Jart: A Little Story About Love
by JartFan-1011
Summary: Hollyoaks Jart story.Its been about a year when Bart sees Jase again. There will be some twists and turns for the happy couple, Can they make it as a couple? please review all review are extremely helpful and appreciated xx  what will happen now?
1. 1 Year Ago Today

**Hollyoaks Jart: a little story about love**

**Chapter one: 1 year ago today**

**Fly thingy isn't strictly mine again the lovely and fantastically talented Cecelia Ahern ( i did change it a bit - soz to those people who thought i actually came up with that idea and wrote it all by myself - and seriously go buy and read her books) xx**

I was watching a fly the other day, it was trying to escape my bedroom and with all its effort to escape it kept hitting its head on the window. Over and over again. It was frustrating and tiring to watch, only because if it had flown just a little higher it would have been free. But no over and over again it kept hitting its little head on the window. Then I began to think if me watching him from my bed across the room, was what it felt like to be god. You sit back and can see the bigger picture, but you can't do anything to help as people always want to do things for themselves. You can see the fly has an escape route but can't see it. I wondered if god to see a way out for me and Bart. I thought if I help this fly god will find a way out for me. It gave me a source of comfort, well it stopped me crying for a while at least until I got distracted and when I came back hours later to find the fly dead on the windowsill. I know it might not have been him, but to show you how vulnerable I am at this moment in my life I started to cry because in my head that dead fly meant Bart and I may never find a way out of this chaos we have found ourselves in.

What is good about sitting back and being able to watch people and their situations when you can't do anything to help those people and you just have to sit and watch them die, knowing you can't do anything to help. I never used to think like this in all these… what's the point I won't ever be able to get away from the past and go back to how it was, before we moved here. Before I met Bart, before life was complicated just before when everyone else was happy even if I wasn't but now I am.

I haven't actually told you anything yet, you must be so confused, that is if you still reading, if you are keep going I promise the story of my life so far will be more interesting than dead bluebottles. My name is Jas, Jasmine Costello but what's interesting about me? A lot is the answer, a lot. You see until I left Chester well go in a cab only to turn around again, you see I said I would never be able to leave. Ok I will start from the beginning.

August 2010 I arrived in Hollyoaks Village, after a summer in America and that was when I meet Bart a few days after came to the Village while I was Jasmine, we had an instant connection, however that was when nobody knew the secret that was tearing me apart inside, I was disgusted by myself. And although Bart and I developed an instant and intimate connection I knew I shouldn't be with him because you see back then I wanted to be a boy or Jason and it wouldn't have been fair to Bart, then again he was so persistent I eventually gave in and we became boyfriend and girlfriend. That was until Fern kept blackmailing me about my secret, back then Bart had no idea what was going on, he was too in love, with me. That all stopped once said stabbed Bart and blamed Jason. That was when I came clean and told Bart everything. His reaction wasn't the best but by far not the worst, he and I eventually became friends and he came with me in December to tell the police about Fern, and tell my family about Jason.

Ok… there you have a background to my story, now present or recently present time. My family are the most broken, possibly ever in history, Dad had an affair with his son Riley's Ex Mercedes McQueen (Bart's Cousin, tragic he is part of that family I know believe me I do), Seth my twin brother has never had a proper girlfriend don't know why he's not too bad looking, but he has dated a few lesbians. And well where do I start with mum and granddad. I will make this short. Granddad killed mum because he thought she was another person (one of the Village sluts actually). And then there's Gem who moved away after dad broke her boyfriends leg. See chaotic family.

So dad and I were supposed to go to America but I couldn't go. And that was 1 year ago today, I have been living near the village while everyone back in the village thinks I am in America.


	2. Welcome Back Jasmine Costello

**Chapter two: Welcome back Jasmine Costello**

"Jasmine, Jasmine wait up come back it been so long wait up I wanna talk to you" Bart called out to me.

"Shit" that was the first word that came into my head. Just over a year I had been living in Chester and nobody had noticed me.

"Oh, hiya Bart, soz I didn't hear you calling" I lied

"Really, I haven't seen you in over a year and all you can say is _hiya_" he seemed pleased I was there but angry at me. "what happened, why are you not Jason any more, it was just an attention thing wasn't it !" he screamed at me. Spitting a little in the process.

No Bart, no I fucking wasn't how could you say that, I just became more comfortable in my body and I found I was booked in for the op and just couldn't do it. I can't explain it, it just kind of happened. I am sorry.

"Sorry, is that really all you can say to me. You dragged me to hell and back wanting to be Jason and just friends. Do you have any idea how hard that was for me?"

You're seriously telling me this Bart, what about me I had to watch your relationship with Sinead. Then with you kissing me all the time but saying it was for Jasmine because you couldn't admit you may have had feelings for a boy!

"A boy" Bart scoffed "a FREAK more like!"

Please let's not start this again. Do you want to go for coffee or something to talk this over it's better than doing it in the pouring rain.

"ok fine whatever"

We walked to Costa and sat down on a sofa together next to the window to watch the rain trickle down the glass window, just sitting there with Bart next to me I felt so happy. I think probably the happiest I had ever been.

So Bart what's up with you these days? I asked praying he would tell me he was as miserable as I was.

"I am great, Sinead and I broke up but yer, I am actually quite happy on my own."

Really, I quizzed him he didn't look happy. Then again neither did I even though I thought I was, although I couldn't help but smile about the fact he wasn't dating anybody.

"No Jas, I am totally fucking depressed, and I am still at Myra's, but I am now happy, seeing you has made my year!" I saw a single tear fall down his cheek and I couldn't help but want to say I LOVE YOU BART MCQUEEN AND I WANTED TO COME AND SEE YOU SO MANY TIMES OVER THE PAST YEAR OR SO BUT I JUST COULDN'T DO IT. I wanted to scream but I resisted and responded by saying oh, I am sorry Bart, if it helps I have missed you.

"I love you Jas" he told me. Well you waited long enough to say that didn't you I love you too Bart McQueen. "Oh thank god Jas I thought you were going to run away like you do every time some tries to get close to you" Bart you know me I love you but when you let people get close to you and open up to them you just end up getting hurt and… "Shut up Jas". And then he kissed me slowly and passionately, like never before it was amazing. The best feeling ever.

"Welcome back Jasmine Costello"

Come on Bart we are going to go and do something romantic.

"But Jas we need to pay for the coffee"

Fuck it Bart, leave it, nothing matters now I have you back as my boyfriend.

"Wow I like this side of Jas, I never got to see it often enough before"

I know Bart I am sorry for the past few years, it's been a very dramatic past few years with everything that's happened between us and our families. "let us leave the past where It is for now, in the past today is about us reconnecting as you have been away for the past year. So how was America?"

Bart I have something I need to tell you. "what, what is it" ok here goes . "sorry Jas I didn't understand a word of that speak slower and clearer"

I never went to America I stayed in Chester but nobody knows not even Riley or Seth, actually Seth does.

"do you know I don't think I really care right know, I just wanna spend the rest of the day with you" ok if that's what you want Bart,

"I know exactly what to do, we are going to go for a picnic in the park ok meet me in the park in half an hour Jas"

So I went home and called Seth and while doing so reapplied make up, curled my hair and put on a dress. Still not things I would usually do as I know I am not a girly girl but for Bart I would make an exception.


	3. Twinkly Lights In The Trees

**Chapter three: twinkly lights in the trees**

You're late. Bart is this how you want to start off our relationship again?

"I am not late, you're just incredibly early, and standing in the wrong place."

What, Bart I am in the park where you told me to meet you, how can I be in the wrong place, when you're here too?

"shhh, just follow me, now I have been hoping you would come back some day Jas. So I have been planning this for a while."

How long is a while?

"364 days, yes the day after you left and yes I counted and I think my idea is now perfect and even better since you're a girl"

I winced at another reference to me being a girl, I am a girl I get it does he have to keep going on about it?

"I mean it would have worked with Jason but probably not as well. Ok right firstly close your eyes, no peeking"

No peeking got it… Bart I promise I am not peeking, "how'd you." I know you Bart, I have known you for years.

"ok, alright shhh now, right open your eyes" oh Bart it's beautiful, it's so… "awesome, amazing or perfect which one Jas" all of them Bart, all of them, I never knew you were such a romantic. "yer well as much as you think you know me, there is a lot still left to learn Jas".

Ok now let explain what Bart had done in the park, right so first off he had found a nice secluded area with lots of trees and flowers and stuff, it was towards the area of the shack but not quite that far away, any way and he'd covered all the trees with coloured fairy light and had a picnic blanket laid out on the ground along with a few cushions and an iPod and its docking station (it was the most romantic thing i have ever seen) then to top it off he had strawberries and champagne for us.

"Jas are you alright" yer course Bart i fine, he'd noticed the small tear falling down my face which then escalated to a waterfall.

I am just so... happy I eventually settled on, this must have taken you forever and cost you so much how did you afford all this. "like i said i have been planning this for over a year, so i have had time to save up." Awww Bart thank you so much it wonder...ful i couldn't speak i was so choked up.

Bart grabbed hand twirled be round and sat me down on the blanket and poured me a glass of champagne, it was only around 7 o'clock in the afternoon so it wasn't too dark but dark enough and there were stars in the sky and the twinkly lights in the trees just made the night so magical.

After a lot of strawberries Bart remembered i like them to be washed so he brought bottled water, he really is thoughtful like that, god i love him so much. And a few glasses of Champagne (the expensive kind). Bart asked me to stand up as he told me he had made his very own Jasmine and Bart playlist or as he liked to call a JART playlist, so cute. And he asked me to dance. He'd never done that before he has gotten much more thoughtful over the past year. So we danced to Kiss Me which was kinda perfect really.

"Jas" Bart says while dancing. Yes Bart, he kind of ruined our lovely romantic moment. "Can i kiss you"? Just do it never ask it ruins the surprise Bart. "Ok so i won't now, but i now know for the future just go for it, got it".

About 5 songs later during this is how it's meant to be another good choice by Bart, he dips me and kisses me, it startled me and i went back to old Jasmine mode, pushing him off of me.

What are doing Bart? I ask "kissing you like you said what's wrong Jas?" sorry nothing it was just a surprise that's all "so you're ok" yer of course do you mind if we sit down for a bit. I sit on the ground with a large thump followed by Bart. "Lie down" excuse me "just lie down Jas please?" ok alright. Bart lies down next to me after taking his shoes off and tells me those stars their pointing at a cluster of stars? Look like a flower. Oh Bart i hate this game i am no good at it, i can barely do it with clouds let alone stars! "Jasmine Ellie Costello, shut the fuck and play the game it is not supposed to be serious just a bit of fun ok!" what the fuck Bartholomew that is not my middle name, i don't have one as my name is so perfect already! "well i like it i think you should change it add a middle name whatever you want i don't mind Ellie, Olivia, Bart, Ceara, Mill..." wow you think highly of yourself trying to get me to put your name into mine i say sitting up pretending to be shocked and angry at him. He realises it's a joke and decides not to play along with it.


	4. I Would Think It Strange If

**Chapter four: I would think it strange if...**

He instead kisses me and pushes me back to the floor. I close my eyes i know i am ready not like when we tried before when i wanted to be Jason i now want to be Jasmine full time forever. I haven't had a boyfriend since Bart i just didn't feel comfortable. I feel the words coming back from all those years ago.

Bart. I say he stops kissing me and looks at me so i have to tell him again, Bart I've never done it before. "Jas you wanted to be a boy i would have thought it strange if you had done it, if you want to take it slow we can but if not, i always carry a little friend with me" he repeats those words again same as a few years ago, they made me want to laugh then and even though i tried not to laugh then and managed it through fear. This time i did just have to laugh out loud, and so did Bart.

No. I tell him, i know and promise this time i am ready. He starts to kiss me again and push me towards the floor and lifts up my dress. Thank god i wore a dress, the time i wear a dress and i am actually happy that i am.

**Next day...**

**Bart's POV - first time it's not Jas wow!**

'Ting Ting' 7.30 am my alarm starts to ring on well fuck it I think to myself as a reach over a peaceful Jas to get my phone. I stop the alarm and lie back down next to Jas, I don't want to get up today, actually I never want to get up I want to lie with Jasmine Costello, my girlfriend forever and always. I love saying those four words, Jasmine Costello, My Girlfriend. My girlfriend, my girlfriend, MY GIRLFRIEND.

"What the fuck"

Oh shit Jas sorry did I wake you? Well duh I woke her up before I shouted in her face she was laying facing towards me, hardly any make up on, she looked amazing, she always has, I love that she isn't like other girls with all the hair and makeup shit. It is just ridiculous. She was only in her underwear covered by my jacket, one shoe off, one on and snoring ever so slightly. It was easily the most beautiful thing I have ever seen in my life time.

"yes Bart you woke me obviously" Jasmine snapped me back to reality and she looked pissed.

"but I don't mind I wanna be awake for as long as possible when I am your girlfriend and you're my boyfriend, because that's what we are aren't we Bart?"

Yes. I smiled, we most certainly are.

"So what happened last night and where are we, it's freezing oh and what's the time?"

Well that's a lot of questions Jas I'm not on question time you know!

"What an earth are you talking about Bartholomew" was there really any need for the full name Miss Costello? Only my dad and auntie Myra call me that when they get annoyed with me for doing something wrong.

"What's so funny Bart" enquired Jasmine.

Oh nothing I was in fact thinking back to the 4th of August 2010 before I met Jas before I was complete. I was thinking back to the day of my step mum's funeral and how I came to live with Myra and the McQueen clan, she told me to come and live with her and I got caught nicking stuff from Drive 'n' buy and that weird policeman dude Dom brought me back and said he would have to call it in and auntie Myra was being all cocky saying that he wouldn't find anything and that's when I told them about my criminal record of petty crime, and burning down the school which was never proven. But the look on her face and the way she shouted Bartholomew, just brought a smile to my face.

"Back to my questions Bart"

Ah yes, the Spanish Inquisition. Right, well where to start. Where we are is what I will begin with. We are in the park near the shack and that's why you're cold, because we are outside, next question please, "the time BART the time" oh yes nearly 8 in the morning. And then that leaves us with what happened last nig… "Did you say 8 shit, I am going to be late for school" Take the day off relax here with me babe. "Urgh don't babe me Bart McQueen!" take it you don't want to know what happened last night then? "Of course I do! Bart don't be so, I'm so late. Meet up later for coffee and a chat about last night, bye BABES" and with a sarcastic "babes" and a wave of her hand she was gone. If only I had noticed the person watching us in the trees that morning and the person following her. Then maybe I could have stopped it!

Ting Ting, my phone bleeped again, this time it was a message.

_**1 new message **_

_**From: Jono **_

_**Hey mate, wher u get 2 last nite, thought me, u and Neil were meetin up and goin for drinks and pick up some chicks. Jono**_

_**Compose new message**_

_**To: Jono **_

_**Yer, soz mate sumfing came up. U and Neil get any girls without me? B**_

_**1 new message**_

_**From: Jono**_

_**Totes dude! Jono **_

_**Compose new message**_

_**To: Jono**_

_**I believe u, nah mate I need evidence. B**_

_**1 new picture message**_

_**From: Jono**_

_**Told u I didn't go to bed alone like somebody, cough cough Bart. Jono**_

_**Compose new message**_

_**To: Jono**_

_**Dude, how did u land that! And I didn't go to bed alone in fact I never went home at all! B**_

_**1 new message**_

_**From: Jono**_

_**Meet me at college coffee now! Jono**_

"Alright" he shouts, Jono is behind the counter at the coffee shop chatting to some girl about how he can get her 50% off a milkshake at college coffee, he has such a way with the ladies. Wow I say could that have gone any worse. "Only if Neil was the one hitting on her" says Jono. Wow you're in good spirits usually you would hit me to the floor for saying that. "Yer well I had a good night last night so I ain't too bothered what you think. So tell me about your night"

No mate soz can't she would kill me!

"At least we know it's a she" exclaimed Neil

What do you MEAN? I say getting defensive, and where did you come from?

"Oh nothing just you know all that business with Jason? And I work here now"

Thought you worked at Mobs and I will tell you too later about me and my girl when she's here to! Laters.


	5. I Bet Your Well Jel!

**Chapter five: I bet your well jel!**

**Sinead POV - new character!**

Me and Bart are like the shop Woolworths everyone expected it to be around forever and always. But the fact is things change, and it's not necessarily a bad thing just not always right. People move on and things change it's a part of life that keeps on going. However in this little situation it's not a case of people moving on it's a case of them not.

She deserved it. She did, she did, she did. She stole him away from me I accept the fact she is no longer Jason, I think, but i can't accept the fact it has been 3 days since we broke up and he has already moved on, and she has already taken my place. I thought we had come to an understanding, when she helped Bart find me in London, I obviously thought wrong. She deserved it.

Right even I am confused now, so you must be, I will start from last night.

**Ok…**

I saw Bart, talking to HER, you know who I mean, that freak JAS COSTELLO! So I followed him to the park. He never did anything like that for me! I watched him stringing lights around the trees checking his pocket for his little friend! Lol that's makes me laugh. Then she came along in a DRESS can you imagine a dress, a less than a year ago she wanted to be a boy now it's all dresses, heels and sex with my boyfriend! What a Bitch. So this morning I followed her and she finally got what was coming to her. I will tell you about that later though. Back to Bart I saw him coming out of college coffee, he looked quite miffed so I sauntered over to him and said you might want to check on your girlfriend! I knew I should never have got involved with a McQueen you lot are all trouble. "And the O'Connor's aren't" he screamed back "stealing babies and getting a girl pregnant aged 12! There's something seriously disturbed with your family Sinead O'Connor." What about yours Mr. know it all, I mean Mercedes and Theresa sleep with Calvin valentine when he was engaged to their sister/cousin Carmel, then Mercedes sleeps with her boyfriend's dad and Myra's first born tries to kill them all in a fire cus he's mentally disturbed, then there's the gay one and Mummy to top it all off, well where do I start? "shut up Sinead" he says walking off, well more running while on his phone probably to his precious girlfriend Jasmine/Jason.

You want to know don't you?

You want to know what I did, well I will tell you.

Well I followed her out of the park early this morning, I knew in my head what I was going to do, I had a knife and anger in my soul. But when it came to it, I couldn't do it. As much as she had hurt me, she hadn't actually psychically hurt me. And I just couldn't do it. well I couldn't do that I could do something else though something I know I am good at and I have a lot a friends so this might just work, I thought to myself.

I waited for her outside her stupid posh school, on my phone so when I saw her with her friends, I did what I did. I knew that nerdy Natalya transferred schools and she owed me a favour so I got her to steal Jasmine's phone, and I copied all her contacts on to my phone and then sent the message, the picture, I updated my status and tweeted.

_**Sinead O'Connor**_

_**Status: Just seen Jason is back in the village, yay party everyone party, as not only is he back he is now a she, that's right folks you have heard it first hear from Sinead O'Connor Jason is Back as Jasmine!**_

_**1,103 commented on this **_

_**Finn: dude sis, r u sure, cus she is fit as I bet your well jel, as she is probs already back with Bart. 10-1 on Sinead losing in a fight between her and Jasmine Costello.**_

_**Sinead: dude shut your fucking mouth!**_

_**Seth: Sinead please stop spreading lies about my family.**_

_**Riley: WHAT THE FUCK, yer Sinead Seth is right stop spreading rumours**_

_**Sinead: It's no joke I saw her and Bart together last night, and Seth cut the crap, that FREAK is your twin you knew, and hid it from Riley its Mercedes and Carl all over again.**_

_**Riley: how dare you mention my family like this! I am going to kill you, you bitch!**_

_**Bart: Sinead I know your upset but really?**_

_**JASMINE COSTELLO: It was me ok, now if everyone could keep calm and stick to the facts if you want to know something ask me!**_

**Jasmine POV - back to the best character ever!**

_**4 new messages**_

_**From. Sandra **_

_**Girl, wot is going on, you wanted to be a boy, that is so messed up you need to go see somebody about that!**_

_**From. Shaun **_

_**Dude, I always knew you were screwed up Costello, but still hot, wanna hook up?**_

_**From. Olivia**_

_**Ok explain, but it's cool I will always be here for you no matter what.**_

_**From. Ellie **_

_**Holy shit big surprise, your one strange, messed up kid, then again I don't blame you were all messed up in one way or another and it's usually our parents faults. Blame them, blame them for everything I do, then you get loads of free stuff. Is your bro Riley seeing anyone at the mo he's hot! Xx**_

Oh my god I can't believe Sinead, her and Bart have been broken up for months, he said so, god can't she get over him. "Jas, wait up Jas" what do you want Shaun I asked placing in my headphones and walking away and crying to Natalie Imbruglia's Torn, "just wanna no if ya got ma text cus you is totes hot" I did and no I do not want to 'hook up' with you as I have a boyfriend, look I say pointing into the distance "don't see anything" right there I say pointing towards Bart walking sexily out of the mist.


	6. My Little Marshmallow

**Chapter six: My little marshmallow**

**Jasmine POV - wooo we love jas/jase no matter boy or girl jase rocks!**

I ran away from Shaun and into the arms of my boyfriend, none other than Mr. Bartholomew McQueen, the love of my life, the apple of my eye, the cherry on top of my cake. Cheesy stuff i know but completely true and when you're in love it just doesn't sound cheesy, well it doesn't to me anyways.

Bart is such a loving, kind, generous and thoughtful person. He also has a slight problem he tends to go a tad overboard or get the wrong end of the stick, take now for example. He starts off all lovely, he pushes my hair out of my eyes, wipes away the tears spilling out of my eyes and down my face then he kisses my head, and he hugs me tight. It felt like nothing could break us at that point. "Oi oi, Jasmine Costello has a Fella, well you dude must be gay wanting to date a girl who wants to be a boy, i only wanted to hook up with her" "what did you say about my girlfriend you jumped up fucking bastard." Bart leave it please. "Jas is this why you're crying cus of this prick" i shake my head as Shaun starts to speak "hey i am Jas's friend i don't wanna make her cry or hurt her." "Hey, i would be careful what you say from now on when you're around me Shaun" Bart taunts him sarcastically.

I can see Bart is beginning to aggravate Shaun so i step in, Bart leave Shaun alone, sure he can be annoying and a bit of a arse sometimes but he's not a bad guy. I am crying cus of what Sinead wrote as hers status. "ahh yes" begins Bart. Wait you knew then why would you think it was Shaun? "because you were with him just now Sinead would have been my second guess, and did you see the comments over a 1,000 and Riley's seen it too." Oh SHIT Riley i forgot to tell him well that was a big mistake, now he will flip out at me especially if he finds out I never left. "Maybe a big Christmas present will fix things" Bart said, I knew he meant well and was trying to help the situation but he wasn't, if anything he was making it worse. Ok now he is pulling silly faces and I can't help but laugh and cry at the same time.

"ok well you two seem happy, this is where Shaun 'the master' Smith bows out and lets the love birds get it on" yer sure that's what we always do when were upset! Goodbye Shaun has a lovely day. "Right marshmallow coffee time" no I don't like coffee Bart, I thought you knew that. I giggled "yes marshmallow of course I did but when I say coffee we don't actually have to have coffee, you can have a hot chocolate" "yes ok with sprinkles and marshmallows and whipped cream" and "a slice of Caramel shortcake, I promise" he remembered what I liked, it was like he read my mind. I love you Bart McQueen. "I love you t…"

What, what Bart what's wrong. "Oh Bart, I am very disappointed in you, I can't believe you told Jas" it is Jas-mine to you, you bitch I can't believe you, you're lucky you're not already lying on the ground unconscious; you should be, for what you did. I yelled at her. Bart, Bart, lovely Bart, control your woman and start telling her the truth! "Sinead please calm down, you don't know what you're saying." "Look Mr. I moved on, so fuck you, I made I have had a drink or two, but now I know how Maddie feels all the time around you". She slurred. She definitely had more than a couple, I whisper to Bart and laughs and pulls me in closer to his side.

"Three days Bart McQueen, three days?" she slurs again. Pointing at Bart then at me wobbling over in her heels towards us, she is so pissed I have to catch her, and hold her up. Once firmly back in her place hits claws at my arm to get off and starts all over again.

"Three days Bart McQueen, three days? We have been broken up three days, even your Mercy waits longer than that, and everyone knows she's the village slut!" get to the point Sinead, I shout at her getting impatient. "I saw you last night at the park with, her, that FREAK over me, you're choosing that freak over me" "Jas Is not a freak OK get that through your thick skull Sinead, I know your brain is the size of a peanut and your IQ is in negative numbers, BUT JAS IS NOT A FREAK OK!" he screams at her spitting a little. Sinead wipes the spit away from her eye and starts to speak again "you make me sick, that's why you broke up with me isn't it, cus you saw her" Sinead snarls. That's not possible Sinead Bart didn't see me until yesterday, did you Bart. Sinead grins at the expression on Bart's face.

His face, filled with regret and his eyes brimming with tears, he puts his hands on my shoulders and says: "I love you Jas, I have never loved anybody as much as I love you right now. And when I saw you on Saturday, I couldn't describe how I felt. I would have felt completely different if I had seen Jase or nobody at all, I had just started to get over losing you and if Jase had come back, we could have been just friends I would still be with Sinead, but when I saw Jasmine, I thought I was dreaming it was the best feeling I have ever had. I knew me planning for your return would be useful." Oh Bart, dear dear sweet little Bart you don't know what this means to me you really don't.

Sinead looking defeated turns to walk away,

"Sinead, wait" she stops and turns "I will be only a minute I promise"

Its fine take as long as you need, I reply.

"Sinead, I am very sorry for all I put you through. I love you I do, I just love Jas more, I shouldn't have tried kidding myself for this long, I also loved Jason more than you too. And I now know I should never have strung you along for so long, keep letting you get hurt over and over again just to help me get over the fact that I loved a dude. However I know realise loving Jason doesn't make me gay, I can't help who I fall in love with, girl or guy, Jasmine or Jason, it was always them and it will never be any different no matter what happens, what obstacles are in our way we will overcome them. What I am trying to say is please Sinead, don't ruin this for me, this is the happiest I have been in a long time."

"Oh, Bart" Sinead exclaims tears cascading down her face. "You really have no faith in me do ya Hun, I love you so much you have been my first and only (so far) true love and all I want is for you to be happy, because seeing you happy, make a little part of me happy and even bigger part sad but that's not the point. All I want is for you to be happy. Your happiness means everything to me Bart McQueen". And with that she turned and started to walk away slowly, Bart ran after her. "thanks Sinead thank you so much, your opinion about me and Jas is the only one that counts and whatever you think about me because of this situation I am so sorry and I really mean it when I say I hope you find happiness as you mean a hell of a lot to me, more than you will probably ever realise. I love you Sinead O'Connor, I am just not in love with you" and he reached over to hug her, afterwards, she slowly turned to me mouthed, sorry and good luck and walked away tears rolling down her face, she had just given up her only love for me Jasmine Costello. I don't deserve to know people like that girl I really don't. So Bart coffee and we can discuss what happened last night and what will happen tonight and tomorrow?

**Bart POV - back to the lovely Bart-throb**

We sat in the same seats as yesterday again watching the rain fall down the glass window, ok so you want to discuss what happened last night because you're such a lightweight who can't remember anything after 2 glasses of champagne. "Yes and it was three glasses" she contested. It doesn't matter what matters is you can't remember what happened last night on our first night back together as an official couple. "I can too, well some of it".

"I remember dancing under the stars and the lights around the trees. It was so beautiful Bart." Thanks I say politely thinking back to my handy work. And I remember repeating what we said a few years back. Then I can't remember anything but flashes of you".

Well you remembered most of it up until I want to say the most important part, but you will think of me as shallow if I say so, "no please, say what you feel, I want you to be able to discuss your feelings with me Bart".

And you think I can't do that why Jas, I mean I think we've established the feelings barrier is pretty far out there by now Jas don't ya think? Ok I will say it you can't remember the most important part for me and possibly for you too, well I expect so at least. Well after we had the reminisce of many moons ago we had sex.

"Bart McQueen, do you think I am stupid, of course I know that I wanna not what it felt like for you, you dozy idiot" and she punches me playfully on the arm. Well Jas If I am being honest I thought that was amazing and so was the rest of the night and I hope we can do it again, but I don't want to rush you into anything and I don't want to be a guy who's interested in his girl for just one thing and one thing only. You are my best friend Jasmine Costello in the entire world and I love you more than anything else and all I want is for us to be happy and together.

"Awww thanks Bart but you can have a voice in the relationship as well, don't think you can't ask for something if you want it. But there is one thing I need your help with, actually 2. Firstly I want to come back to Hollyoaks 6th Form College with you by my side and I need you by my side when I see Riley tomorrow, and we go to school the next day together, because together we can face anything."

Of course I will be with you when you inform Riley and as for school I am surprised you even had to ask, there is no doubt in my mind about that. At all.

And I have a question to ask you?

"Fire away hunny bun, I see the expression on your face, are you the only one who can use pet names?"

I nod that's correct my little marshmallow. Right any way my question to you is what are we doing tonight?

"Well I am glad you asked because it Is my turn to pick and as I can't beat yours last night, I am not sure it will be at all great but I want you to come back to my flat, well penthouse suite?" "How does that sound?"

Amazing, fucking amazing it sounds fucking amazing. You should have seen her home it was amazing she has changed so much since I last saw her, she shares the flat with two friends Olivia and Ellie, they were nice, somewhat intimidating, but they are mega rich so I can't complain. We sat on Jas's couch eating pizza and beer just like good old times while watching spoof movies, tonight's Vampires suck- great as we both hate twilight, and it was just great just because she was like the old Jas with the burping contests, and shit like that, her roommates' faces were gold they wondered what in god's name was going on when she burped, they came out to tell me off and saw it was her and Jas just laughed. Then we went to her room well I carried her into her room and we fell asleep like we used to all cuddled up to each other, romantic but totally innocent.


	7. Neil 'The Doofus' Cooper

**To Ceara, I don't if you're on fanfiction reading yet, but this is for you, Neil and Jono are in the story for you as you love them xx**

**Chapter seven: Neil 'the doofus' Cooper**

**Jasmine POV - woo Jas!**

I woke up a 7 am as usual and padded out to the kitchen carefully so as not to wake Bart, he'd kill me literally if I got him up at this time! So I go into the kitchen where my roommates were sitting eating toast and in deep conversation, I went and got myself a cold slice of pizza, tastes so good cold pizza, I love hot food cold.

"wow, Jas you've changed a lot these past couple of days, you used to be so girly and neat and tidy, now you're a slob, with you weirdo of a boyfriend."

What do you mean? I have always been like this, you just never noticed because you're only interested in yourselves and others like you, rich Bitches. Well I ain't like you and never will be. I am like Bart and he loves me for it. and if you have a problem with that well… I stopped there I couldn't finish off the sentence.

"No Jas your right we don't like it, we've discussed this and think it's about time you moved out and found your own place, you don't pay rent, or bills here so we would like you to go"

"But you don't have to leave right now" Olivia blurted out, trying to make me feel a little better.

"Just be out by the time we come home, and don't come back to school, our school doesn't take FREAKS in, only normal people!" Ellie snarled.

I choked back tears and ran back to my room, instantly forgetting about Bart I jumped into bed and threw the covers over my head, and turning over on my side, knocking Bart out the bed in the process." "WHAT THE FUCK" exclaimed Bart.

Soz dude, I said leaning over the bed, but now that you're up. I said laughing watching him get to his feet while rubbing his neck. "Damn right I am up, what you want?"

Slight probs we have Bart the girls have made me homeless. "What!" Bart screamed, as he began to march out of the room.

Bart wait. I called

"What?" Bart quizzed me looking confused

Clothes would be good, I said through laughter.

"Oh, right yer good idea!" he said pulling on some jeans, he ran out the door closely followed by me "Oi, where are you" Bart shouts

Bart they would have left by now, I say almost in tears.

"Hey, marshmallow, cheer up and calm down we shall sort out arrangements later, first let's get dressed, get your stuff packed and then go get some coffee then see Riley, Ok?"

I nod after wiping my eyes and pushing my hair away from my face.

We stood outside college coffee, it was 8 am not too many people would be in there now, all at college or in a lecture thank god. "Hun, you alright" Bart asks and kisses the top of my head.

Fine, I am just fine. Let's go and get a drink, we make our way up the steps and open the doors. Bart stops right in front of me, turns around pushing me down the steps. "Neil and Jono are in there, I forgot they both have the day off college today!"

Bart we have to face them sometime, good a time as any, is right now when there isn't many people around, correct?

"I suppose, they have never met Jas though only Jason."

So what, new people fresh start.

"No we can't keep it from them we have to tell them, Neil may not be the sharpest tool in the box but Jono will figure it out eventually, and if not he'll just try it on with you. He'll jump anything that moves that one!"

We walk back up the steps and straight to the counter.

"Alright mate" Jono calls out "Neil look who's here, and well what have you brought with you. Is this the girl from the other night then? Finally, nice to meet you."

"Yer, calm down boys this is Jason… I mean Jasmine SHIT"

Smooth Bart, real smooth.

"Did I hear ya right? That's Jason? I thought Jason was a dude, but that's a girl?" Neil queried.

Yer state the obvious Neil, you were always a doofus. I say in my Jason voice.

"Fuck, dude that's Jason alright, Shit dude you look fit as, as a girl I mean, not as a bloke that would be weird!"

I get it Jono. Yer well, now I am back as Jasmine, actually I never left but I am back with Bart, he is so amazing.

"How is it you always get the girl?" both Jono and Neil shout at the time. "You wanna go out some time Costello?" shouts Neil, god he really is so dumb definitely Neil 'the doofus' Cooper, I am with BART MCQUEEN Neil.

And Bart and I walk out of the coffee shop leaving Jono and Neil fighting over some girl's number.

**Riley's POV - another new POV.**

_**1 new message **_

_**From. Seth**_

_**Jas told me to tell you that she is coming over to speak with you and that Bart is with her.**_

_**Compose new message**_

_**To. Seth**_

_**Shit dude, when I am with Mitzeee right now.**_

_**1 new message**_

_**From. Seth**_

_**Now, and wooh too much info bro, I no u and Mitz r 2gether but that dnt mean I wanna hear bout it!**_

_**Compose new message**_

_**To. Seth **_

_**Soz bro, were in love and fanks 4 lettin me no. :) **_

'Knock knock'

"Riley come on open up please, I am sorry" Shit Mitzeee Jasmine is here already, just coming Jas one sec. I open the door to Jas and Bart, who wonder in. sorry I was just with Mitzeee, were going out now Jas.

"Finally, I was wondering when you to were gunna get it on!" she laughs as does Bart, I am trying to be cool about the situation but I have so many burning questions, I am dying to ask them.

What about you 2 talking about finally getting it on!

"I know isn't it amazing?" Bart and Jas say at the same time. Then laugh about it.

Now come here and give your big brother a hug I haven't seen you like this in years. "I know I am so sorry I didn't tell you sooner and I am sorry I made Seth keep it from you" it's fine Jas I don't mind, I am just glad your back and safe and most of all happy, you are happy aren't you?

"Oh Riley, I have never been happier than when Bart found me, I thought it was going to be hard but so far it's all good."

What about you McQueen are you happy?

"Yes of course and I promise I will never hurt Jas ever again"

"You better not or you'll have me to deal with" I see Jas's face and stop, sorry Jas he has to hear the famous Costello, if you hurt my kid I will break your leg speech!" I laugh and so does she, Bart however doesn't seem too impressed.

I have a question Jasmine though. "Sure shoot" can we go and do something as a family well extended family, you can take Bart, and I will take Mitzeee and Seth can take his girlfriend. "Seth has a girlfriend?" oh yer Soz didn't you know? And while this is definitely a day for surprises I will continue with the next surprise on the Costello list of surprises, Mitzeee and I are going to have a baby. I would have told you but I didn't know where you were but we are having a February baby. But we chose not to know whether it would be a boy or a girl.

"we are so happy for you aren't we Bart"

"yer, totes excited for you dude"


	8. I Believe BART MCQUEEN Is

**Chapter eight: I Believe BART MCQUEEN Is An Ok Lad**

**This chapter will be written in a email/letter type format, not strictly my idea got it from a book by Cecelia Ahern OMG i love her books, everybody should read them xx**

**Jas POV - I love JAS so much x**

So i Just got an email Seth, "why you telling me this Jas?" it is from Dad. "Well then i don't want to know"

**_New email_**

**_Hello Jasmine, it is your father here, I do not use email very often but i will have to now since calling is far too overpriced. Well Jasmine i hope all is going well back in Chester, NO DOUBT in my mind you are back with BART MCQUEEN, don't do anything silly as you know my views on boyfriends! _**

**_DAD._**

_Send new email_

_Hey Dad, hope you are well, everything is great here, having never needing to speak to those 'jumped up their own arse' American idiots. I am therefore very glad i only came over for a visit in the summer. And do not worry about me and BM we are not together xx_

_J. _(don't worry Bart and I haven't broken up, it is all very good still, for now)

**_New email_**

**_Jasmine, i am very sorry to hear about you and Bart, although you may think that i did not like him, that was only because your were my baby girl, but as i can see now through the events of the past years, with Jason, the wedding and all the other chaos i feel i can mention i can't physically say the others), i can see how much you have grown up and how when you were with Bart throughout all the pain in your life he made it all much easier for you. So for that i believe that Bart McQueen is an Ok lad and as you two are not dating now i feel that it is alright for me to say this. And if we wish me to i will give my permission for you two to be together. Thank you for staying away from Bart, until now._**

**_Dad._**

_Send new email_

_What i told you last time was a lie and i am sorry. I truly am, BM and i are together and we are very happy and i love him so you are half way around the world and there is not a thing you can do so i do not care what you and like i need your permission to DATE him, if you think that you can tell me what to do after everything that has happened with our family then you are completely out of your mind. And just SILAS he did it he MURDERED our mum, his own daughter and all those other girls just say it. He was a raving lunatic. So FUCK him and FUCK you, it should have been you and not her. We all think it just nobody has ever dared say it. Admit it even you think it would have been better for everyone if it was you and not her?_

_Goodbye _

**_New email _**

**_Jasmine Costello, your no daughter of mine, then again you never did want to be my DAUGHTER did you? How dare you use language like that, i take back what i said about Bart McQueen. He is a very bad influence on you. And for your information i do not think it should have been me, but i don't think it should have been your mother either. That EVIL BASTARD took her from me, from all of us. And no matter how much i regret what i did to you all i can't take it back so we have to deal with it._**

**_Goodbye sweetheart have fun with the McQueen lad until he breaks your heart. That's what they all do, the McQueen's breaking people's hearts and families it is their speciality. REMEMBER THAT, REMEMBER IT WELL. My advice will teach you a valuable lesson someday, someday Jas, mark my words someday._**

**_D. _**

_Send new email_

_Dad i will never remember as Bart is loving, kind and romantic. Deal with it. He loves me and i love him._

_JAS._

**_New email _**

**_I do not doubt it Jasmine, but once he gets what he wants he will leave you straight away._**

**_Trust me. I know Dad._**

_Send new email_

_With the amount of affairs you have had you ought to know but you don't really do you, because he hasn't left yet has he? _

_Told you, i am right and you are wrong J. X_

**_New email_**

**_Jasmine, please tell me you haven't, i cannot believe you, your 17, you are my baby girl what in god's name were you thinking?_**

_Send new email_

_Erm... i so do not want to talk about this with you, though i suppose it is better when your over in America and i am in England as you can't kill poor Bart. If you must know i was l thinking, last time wasn't great he called be a freak and i ended up cutting myself. I now know who i am, he wants to why not? It is no biggy, and i was right. Ok HAPPY now?_

_JASMINE._

_**New email**_

_**HAPPY, no i am very disappointed in you, but if you love him i cannot stop you. However last time, there was a last time. Actually i do not want to know.**_

_**See you/speak later DAD.**_


	9. I Would Like To Name Her Heidi

**The start of a few Christmas chapters i think?**

**Chapter nine: I would really like to name her Heidi**

**Seth POV - don't think i have done a Seth POV before, just to let you know i love him**

Mitzeee what's for lunch? I'm hungry!

"Get it yourself you lazy boy, i am 7 months pregnant you know" Mitzeee fired back at me.

JAS make me some lunch, i called out to her as she was walking past in her pyjamas, she is one lazy fucker!

"Seth it is 11.30 am it isn't lunch time can't you wait, go out with this new girlfriend of yours!"

She ain't my girlfriend and if you ain't noticed Jas, it is Christmas Eve and people are busy.

"Yer with their families, do you remember that tradition with mum, every year since like forever mum would take us to the cinema on Christmas Eve, and let us watch whatever we wanted. Remember a few years ago when you dragged us to see 2, that was one shit film."

Yer i do mum really made Christmas for us didn't she, it was the one day that the whole family would come together and be happy even you and her. We don't even have a tree this year.

"Mum always did that. I think we should go get one"

**Bart POV - just a little bit of Bart makes Christmas even better, don't you just wish you could open him as a prezzie on December the 25th (yer i really love him)**

Myra the baby is crying, i call, deal with it Bart she shouts back it never feels like Christmas in this house.

I pick up the baby and hold it at arm's length away from me and pull faces at it, it only cries harder god i hate babies; i put it back and stop to think. I pull on some jeans and a Christmas jumper, don't judge me, i am feeling festive and i go round to see Jas, she has moved back with her brothers and a very fat Mitzeee. See what i wrote a few years ago on that wall is now correct. That was a great day, mine and Jasmine's first kiss the 10th of August 2010.

I grab my coat and shoes and leave, yes in December no shoes or coat, madness i know i just had to get out of there. I arrive at the pub and Jas is behind the Bar pulling a pint, she has never looked fitter.

**Ting Ting,**

**1 new message**

**From. Jono**

**Hey turn around i c u, y u wearin no shoes? Busy nite? Fought u had a girl? She into that is she, get me involved. J**

**Compose new message**

**To. Jono**

**I am still with J and no we r nt into that, remind me y am i mates wit ya? Bart**

Alright guys, what you doing in here it is not even mid day on a Saturday, i enquire at friends Jono, Neil, Tilly and some other dude who i don't know.

"well hunny, we thought we would catch up with you cus we thought you would totes be with Jas last night, but sadly no, did she not like what she saw last time?"

No. I say getting angry, which isn't usually the case with Tills as she is usually pretty sweet. She just wanted to spend time with her family if that's alright with you lot.

"Hey Bart". Jasmine calls out to me from behind the bar.

Hey how's you babes?

"i'm good do you wanna come over later?"

Yer ok, cya then i think i may hang out with them lot not seen em in a while, bye babes mwah, i give her a quick peck on the lips.

**Jasmine POV - back to the lovely and wonderful Jasmine (yer i also love her too)**

"oh, do we all get a kiss sweetie"

No ya don't now piss off, your barred. Ok so i probably went a tad overboard but am i a little irate at the moment, all thanks to my lovely dad Carl Costello.

His words see you/speak to you later how can he see me he is in America.

Me and Mitzeee are going to pick a tree after the lunch rush has ended, i know it is late but as people always say, better late than never.

**Fast forward until 4pm**

I take back what i said before (**better late than never**), dad showed up, i know i was in shock too.

**Compose new message**

**To. Bartholomew**

**Nt safe 2 come ova CC. Is back, i no, i shocked 2 mayb i culd come ova 2 u insted ? xx**

**1 new message**

**From. Bartholomew**

**Nah not good here lots of screamin (nt from the baby either) meet u at shack 7 xx**

**Compose new message**

**To. Bartholomew**

**C u l8r xx**

What are you doing here dad, it maybe Christmas but your still not welcome what would everyone say?

"well, it is Christmas"

Oh yer time for joy and time for cheer.

"That's the sprit Jas" he says completely oblivious to the sarcasm in my voice.

Riley and Mitzeee walk through the door discussing baby names. "I like Elise, for a girl and Jude for a boy." "Riley why do you hate our child? How about Andrew for a boy and if it is a girl i would really like to name her Heidi, if that's alright with you".

"err, i will have to think about that Mitz-, what about you Jas do you have any su-"

"Hello son" Carl's voice stop him completing the sentence.

"What the hell Jas, i can't believe you let him in this house"

Riley believe me, if I'd have known i would not have done. Trust me i hate him just as much as you do. Well this has been lovely, but i am gonna leave now, dad, Riley, Mitzeee.

"Blondie" somebody calls and i turn around "you hoo Blondie up here" he shouts in an Irish accent, "your Riley's little sister aren't ya, well when you next time you's see him tell him Brendan Brady wants a word, alright sweet heart. Now run along"

I make my way to the shack it may only be 6 o'clock but it is December and it is quite dark, at least i know my way there.


	10. All Your Christmas Wishes

**Firstly hello to the anonymous review sup who wrote:**

Why is Jasmine so pissed off with Carl? She moved to California with him and they got along fine... what's with the sudden change of heart? You need to write them more in character to be honest... because it doesn't make sense. Also Jas isn't a slut.

**And to you i say if you are still reading this and haven't checked my profile recently.**

**Please read or re read the story and you should understand, and i have never ever ever (and i won't ever say) Jas is a slut because she isn't and i am insulted that you would think that i would write that about the best character ever written ( in my personal opinion ) in TV / MOVIE history. And also how do you know that her and Carl are getting along fine in California? Would be interested to know as it has never been mentioned as they have only just left the show, but thank you for the review xx**

**AND THANK YOU TO EVERYBODY ELSE FOR ALL YOUR LOVELY REVIEWS – ANOTHER XMAS CHAPTER AND WITH MORE CARL – JUST FOR YOU GIRLWEDNESDAY AS WE ALL KNOW YOU LOVE A LITTLE BIT OF CC. THEN AGAIN WHO DOESN'T?**

**Chapter ten: All your Christmas wishes will come true**

**We are going to start off back at the flat with Carl, Riley and Mitzeee.**

**Carl's POV - oh he's so hot don't you think?**

I am sorry son for all that i did before i hope you know that, and anyways i came to see Jasmine and Bart McQueen. Not you, but i am sure that you will be pleased to hear that.

"Oh Carl i am so sorry about that" exclaims riley sarcastically. "well as you just witnessed Jas has just left and i don't know when she will be back and you aren't welcome here so please get the FUCK out and merry Christmas!"

"Babes was that really necessary?" Mitzeee asks riley twirling the tie he was wearing around her finger and in the process pulling him closer towards her and giving him a kiss, before leading him into one of the bedrooms.

Goodbye then and merry Christmas to you too. – i stalk out of the flat and sit downstairs at the bar, the pub is empty with it being Christmas eve and all that, Riley had shut up early to spend time with his little precious girlfriend.

My girlfriend Elise is back in America, she is young, pretty, charming and funny too. I am spending out first Christmas as a couple away from her, trying to make amends with my family – if you can call it that now.

**Calling ... Jas**

Fine then don't answer you phone you will see this text though ... eventually.

**Compose new message**

**To. Jas**

**My little baby girl i am so sorry for everything that i did to you and your mum and brothers and especially Gem, that was a low point. I have found a way to make it right, i do hope you can forgive me and remember that no matter what, and i do mean that, despite what you may think that i love you and that i always will. Dad xx**

**Compose new message**

**To. Elise**

**My sweet girl, i love you, i know we haven't been together that long but i just wanted to tell you that i love you so much, but you just cannot compete with her, never nobody can and nobody will have the chance. I will miss you. Carl xx**

**Jasmine's POV - back to the best character ever who is by no means a slut.**

I am sitting in the shack staring at this candle it is nearly burnt out completely, Bart must have been here a lot while i was away, i can't believe i ever left him, why did i do it why. I ask myself that all the time now how could i have left him all broken in tiny pieces having to play the loving boyfriend to Sinead when he clearly only wanted me.

Forgiveness starts to play in the background i sit for a while and listen to it, then i come to my senses and realise it is my ringtone – just the chorus though, it reminds me of mine and Bart's trip to London, the best day of my life... and the worst, it was when i left Bart, alone in a big city not knowing what to do and the day i made him delete those texts i don't know why i did, i thought it might help me to forget but i couldn't, not for a single second. Bart's face, his hands, his chest, his hauntingly beautiful eyes whenever he looked at me, i could see it there always – the i love you, don't ever leave me look, i just choose to ignore it.

So it was my dad on the phone i also choose to ignore that and the text he sent me. It was only 6.40 pm Bart would be ages yet. I lay down and closed my eyes, i dreamt of Jason and of Bart and of mum all together nothing special just there together talking, it was wonderful, it was as though mum was back in my life. Then i awoke to the sound of Bart crashing through the door and realised the harsh reality mum was dead and therefore never coming back, but dad, dad was here and i must make the best of it, but for now Bart was all i needed to think about.

"Oh Jas" Bart mumbled looking confused as to why i was there.

Hi Bart you asked me to meet you here didn't you?

"Yer, of course it was me, who else would it have been? It is only ten to seven i just expected to be the first one here but i don't mind, it just means that i can spend more time with my beautiful girl"

**Bart's POV – love him**

Shit this is not going well i didn't expect Jasmine to be here now what am i gonna do i have her present outside and it is raining, it will get ruined.

Jas, i say becoming all touchy feely and sensitive, with totes ain't Bart McQueen. But Jasmine just brings out that side to me.

Well i was wondering as it is Christmas Eve and all that i thought we could, as we won't see each other tomorrow. Probably, but only if you wanted to.

"Bart, i don't know, now did you bring anything with you?"

Oh no i didn't mean that Jas i am disappointed that you think so little of me, i meant Christmas presents.

"oh right ok you are lucky i brought it with me cus i wasn't sure but Seth thought i should as tomorrow is a day for family and i said you were family but he just kept on and on so i gave in and brought it with me"

Good i am so glad you did, yours is outside. And after the gift exchange we could always you know!"

And for saying that i get a punch in the arm, quite a hard punch i might add for a girl, then again Jasmine Costello, my girlfriend isn't your average, brainless slapper like some girls i know...

**Jasmine's POV - its totes impossible not to love her when she is Jasmine or Jason.**

I had a really hard time trying to find Bart a present, we have only been together again for a few weeks and i wasn't really sure on where he stood on the whole presents giving kind of thing, it had just never seemed like something he would do with people. I seem to recall i never got a Christmas present off him before and the birthday present he got me, well actually thinking about that, it was probably at the time the best present i could have ever wanted - he actually changed my name for me, legally to Jason, mum was furious and well that made Bart all the more happy. So anyways enough about the past let me concentrate on the present and Christmas Eve 2012, so Bart left the shack immediately and came back seconds later only this time with a largish sort of Christmas bag and i produced from behind where i was sitting, a small box.

**Bart's POV - sorry for all the changes it just seems easier this way xx**

I left the shack and brought back seconds later a larger than average Christmas bag with Jas's present inside and then she produced a very tiny little box, i know that you aren't supposed to give to receive and all that shit but i just couldn't help feeling a tad disappointed as i had gone to so much effort and it didn't look like she had, she may have found it hard to buy for me, but i think it was probably increasingly harder for me to buy for her, she wasn't girly and all that so make up, jewellery and clothes were out of the question so it had really stumped be for what to give her as a Christmas present. Our first Christmas as a couple i wanted it to be special, no drama, just a normal Christmas, well as normal as can be with all that has happened to us.

**Jasmine's POV - i don't know what to say now except, i can't believe she/he isn't in the show anymore.**

Right back to the presents. So we switch presents our hands brush slightly as we exchange gifts, i don't think i have ever been happier in my entire life. Which granted probably isn't the hardest to be happy with but still. Ok so me and Bart tossed a coin to see who would open theirs first. Bart took a coin from his pocket and flip it up in the air.

"Tails" Bart shouted

Well i supposed i get heads then i wanted tails, i whined.

"Tough shit girly" Bart laughed with happiness.

"it is tails Jas so i win and i want you to open yours first, as i will be the gentlemen. As the saying goes, lady's first" he said smugly.

Well ok and i carefully pull apart the bag, there are two presents inside and a card, we all go for the card first don't we? We don't care about it, we are just trying to prove we aren't rude. It is a beautiful card, a Christmas tree is on the front with small, fake, diamonds incrusted with the tree and above the tree the gold lettering reads MERRY CHRISTMAS JASMINE. It must have cost him so much and it was wonderful, i could have died right then, he had really gone to so much effort for me and i was dreading this thinking it was gonna be something crap and stupid, like a fez and a bowtie.

I took the smaller present in both of my hands and took a long hard look at it, it was a small box shape and i had no clues as to what it could be, however there was a huge smile on Bart's face so it must be something i like – that is what i thought at the time and i was right. I carefully started to undo the wrapping paper.

"Oh my god jasmine just rip it off"

Fine if that's how you want it. And i started to claw at the paper with my nails, once the paper was off i opened the box and there was another smaller box inside, it was a mobile to be precise a Samsung galaxy mini, a phone i had seen last week in the shop window and said how much i wanted it. I lifted the other present of the bag it was much heavy than the last one, so i ripped of the paper and inside was a beautiful photo frame filled with all different pictures of me and him and some of me and my family too. There was a lovely picture of me, mum and Seth that i had completely forgotten had even existed.

Oh Bart it... they are the best presents i have ever gotten, they are so wonderful. Mwah i gave him a kiss on the lips to show my appreciation for the gifts, it must have taken him so long to find them and prepare them. And i loved them.

Now for your present and card i flung a small envelope at him, he ripped it open and saw a card, just a plain Christmas card nothing special it is only a card after all. But then he opened the box i could see his little face filled with disappointment as he saw there was a piece of card with some words printed on it and a smaller box, he shook the lid off the small box and into his hands fell a set of keys and he gingerly picked up the piece of card and read it out load, _**go to the place of our first kiss, and all your Christmas wishes will come true**. _he stood up slowly and then ran out of the door, i grabbed my wonderful Christmas present and followed behind him.

He ran to the place where he had first kissed me right beside the graffiti **_Mitzeee is fat_**, still there after all these years, ah memories. He saw Jono coming out of the shadows alongside Neil carrying a huge package.

So, I said i was speaking to Jono and Neil the other day and discovered something, and what your ultimate Christmas present was, i asked Myra about it and she said she didn't have enough money, but i said i did and she told me to go for it and gave me all the information i needed. So BART MCQUEEN i JASMINE COSTELLO present to you your 2012 Christmas present. Drum roll please.

And with that Neil started to make a drumming sound on Jono's head.

"Cut it out Neil, we gotta go now and leave the lovebirds to it."

Bye then, thanks for all your help guys.

"No probs Jas, any friend of Bart's is a friend of mine and i think you know what i mean" he laughed.

I am good with just Bart thanks i don't need you as well. I laughed as well that was well... Jono.

So Bart open your present then please i am dying to see your face!

"Ok alright quit nagging me, i am about to"

So Bart opened his present and became speechless, literally no words came out at all, for i had purchased, as his Christmas present something he dearly wanted. I shall give you a clue, he once left one by the side of the road and his way to London. That is correct, i had brought him a brand new scooter for his Christmas and the look on his face when i gave him that small box and the look now, i the main reason why i brought the scooter and why i gave it to him like this.

**Carl's POV - back to this 'lovely' man**

**Carl at this moment in time is walking across a bridge.**

Ok so maybe i did regret all i had done, but was this a good idea. Yes it is, i convinced myself it is best for everybody. After speaking to Jas, Riley and Mitzeee i realised something, something very important. Probably the most important thing i have ever thought.

**Now this next bit is in the form of a letter or a few letters.**

Dear Riley, Gem, Jasmine and Seth.

After speaking to jasmine via email the other day i decided to come back to England for Christmas but it is clear to me now that none of you really want much to do with me anymore, and for that i am deeply sorry. You are all grown up now and do not need me anymore, not that you ever really needed me, i only ever made your lives hell and for that i am also sorry just please remember i did it because i love you and for that reason and that reason only i love you. I just need to spend time with the one person that i love and always have and who loved me no matter what i did, they stuck by me and i think it is about time that i repay that favour. Remember i will always love you your my kids and always will be. Enclosed you will find 4 letters. 1 to each of you. Love you always no matter what.

Dad xx

Riley,

I know that we aren't on the best of terms at the moment and i am sorry as it was completely my fault and i know and can see very clearly that you have moved on with your life, please try and find it in yourself to forgive Mercedes as you do have a child together. And i have to say congrats to you and Mitzeee despite what you may think i always knew you two would end up together and for that i am so happy, you are perfect for each other. Don't lose her Riley she is one amazing woman, after the baby is born, please put your mum's engagement ring to good use. Love you and sorry.

Dad xx

P.S hope the footie pans out the way YOU want, not my dreams they are yours do what you want.

Gem,

I don't really know what to say, just that i am sorry for all i did to try and break you and Liam up. And that i am pleased you have moved on and are married now. I love you and always will.

Dad xx

Seth,

Dear dear Seth, i love you so much and i am desperately sorry for the way i have treated you these past years. You were right, when you were a decent person and i hope to god you always will be. I do hope you can forgive me i love Seth so much.

Dad xx

Jasmine,

My little baby girl, this is the hardest of all the letters to write, as i have said to you before i am very sorry about the whole Jason thing. I should have tried harder and accepted you sooner. I love you remember that, and i hope you can find it, in that huge heart of yours to forgive me. And i hope that you and Bart have a wonderful life together.** _(Pass the letter enclosed to Bart) _**i love you so much forgive me, all i want is for you to be happy.

Dad xx

**_Bart McQueen, _**

**_What i am about to say will not shock you, look after my baby girl and remind her often how much i love her, because what i am about to do should fix everything. I don't know what you thought of me a few years back, but here is what i thought of you. You were a criminal and were not good enough for my daughter. But now i can see clearly how happy you make her, so welcome to the family and treat her well. _**

**_Carl Costello._**

I am ready. I think. No i know i am, i am ready to be with my wife now. I miss her so much, more than i ever thought imaginable and i can't live without her, goodbye.

And with those last thoughts Carl lets go of the bridge and plunges into the cold waters below and sinks down and all the pain is gone, he can now finally be at peace with himself and all he has done in his life, good and bad. Him and his wife are together now forever.


	11. But Life Is Never That Simple

**The last Xmas chapter i think – there may possibly be one more xx little thing to say though i like the character of Ethan so in my story he never handed himself in.**

**Chapter eleven: But Life Is Never That Simple In Hollyoaks.**

**Jas POV - we shall start off with the main characters POV**

It was cold and raining as Bart and i walked back to the McQueen's we were going to drop off Bart's scooter before heading back to the shack - neither of us wanted to particularly go back home just yet. We walked hand in hand, back through the village Bart and i had driven back to his on his new scooter to show the McQueen's - who as usual weren't in so Bart put the scooter away and we started the walk back, which is when it started to drizzle.

"Oh it's only drizzling, don't worry Jas" Bart said.

Oh Bart i am not worried it's only a bit of water, oh no wait my hair will get all messed up i can't go out in the rain. I said confused and sarcastically. For once Bart actually understood that it was sarcasm and grabbed my hand pulled me into the rain. He got out his iPod and stuck a headphone in his ear and in mine and played the song pretending - the GLEE version, i didn't know he liked GLEE, when i quizzed him on this he said:

"Oh no i don't but i thought that this song had quite a meaning to us as a couple and i like the GLEE version better than the original."

Ok Bartholomew i believe you, i teased him. Anyway so we were listening to the song and in the rain, he pulled me closer and we started dancing, in the rain. It was great he can be so romantic when he wants to be, i never knew he had it in him, to behave this way, but i was starting to like it. A lot.

While we were in the middle of dancing the rain stopped drizzling and became a massive downpour, still we were in such a trance we completely forgot about the rain and kept dancing. And we only stopped when i heard my name being called, well more liked shouted and a tap on my back.

"Jasmine, Jas where the hell are you" Riley shouted. Then he saw here outside the shops in the village dancing with Bart McQueen, he ran over and began tapping her shoulder repeatedly.

"Jas" he repeated as well

What

It is about dad; Seth came running from the other direction.

"Oh you found her then Riley"

Would someone like to tell what's going on, i told you i was spending tonight with Bart, Jasmine looked at her brothers she could see in their faces that something wasn't right, it was her who was always concerned about dad, not them.

"There is no easy way to say this Jas, Ethan came over earlier and well..." Riley began, he couldn't continue so Seth took over. "He said the police found a body by the river and that they believe, well they know that it was dad. I'm sorry Jas"

I fell into Bart's arms and cried, Bart held me and kissed the top of my head and said "everything is going to be ok" how do you know that Bart, it's not Ok this day probably couldn't get any worse.

"Actually" Riley began, again Seth finished "the police said there was a strong possibility that it was suicide as they found a letter on the body addressed to us three and Gem, we've called her and she will be here soon, she was already on her way to Manchester for fashion show"

Ok, we will open it together the six of us.

"Six?" Seth queried looking confused.

Yer: you, me, Riley, Gem, Mitzeee and Bart.

"I think it should just be us four Jas" Seth said gently.

No i want Bart there and i am pretty sure that Riley wants Mitzeee there. I shot back

"She is right Seth we all need support Seth and Bart and Mitzeee can provide us with that support, if that's alright with you Bart?"

"Of course, i want to be there for Jas as much as i can and as much as she will let me"

**Gem's POV - awww, i loved Gem and this was a great opportunity to bring her back.**

I walked into the village to find what is left of my broken family standing by the fountain.

Jas? I asked completely baffled by her being here.

"OMG, did nobody think to mention to her i was a girl again, she has enough drama to deal with today as it is?" Jasmine hissed at her brothers. Before nestling back into Bart's chest, and he wrapped her arms around her and held her tightly.

I am so happy for you Jas. She started to say something about Jason; save it Jas i think there are more important things to deal with right now don't you. She nodded. I don't care what gender you are boy, girl as long as you're happy i am happy. I finished, i thought it was best to leave it there, for now anyways.

From my pocket i pulled out a large envelope, i got this from the station on my way here, to save you the trouble Riley, it's the letter. You read it Riley.

**Riley's POV – Probably the best POV if he's reading it?**

_Dear Riley, Gem, Jasmine and Seth._

_After speaking to jasmine via email the other day i decided to come back to England for Christmas but it is clear to me now that none of you really want much to do with me anymore, and for that i am deeply sorry. You are all grown up now and do not need me anymore, not that you ever really needed me, i only ever made your lives hell and for that i am also sorry just please remember i did it because i love you and for that reason and that reason only i love you. I just need to spend time with the one person that i love and always have and who loved me no matter what i did, they stuck by me and i think it is about time that i repay that favour. Remember i will always love you your my kids and always will be. Enclosed you will find 4 letters. 1 to each of you. Love you always no matter what._

_Dad xx_

Jas, here's yours, Seth yours and Gem yours. And mine is last.

We all spilt off to read our letters.

**Bart's POV - i am only gonna do his and Jas's letter as you have read the others and it is a JART story.**

Jasmine,

My little baby girl, this is the hardest of all the letters to write, as i have said to you before i am very sorry about the whole Jason thing. I should have tried harder and accepted you sooner. I love you remember that, and i hope you can find it, in that huge heart of yours to forgive me. And i hope that you and Bart have a wonderful life together. **_(Pass the letter enclosed to Bart) _**i love you so much forgive me, all i want is for you to be happy.

Dad xx

"Here Bart my dad wrote you a letter as well" i think is what she said it was quite muffled and through all the crying i couldn't really hear her properly. Thanks Jas. I say just to be nice and polite.

**_Bart McQueen, _**

**_What i am about to say will not shock you, look after my baby girl and remind her often how much i love her, because what i am about to do should fix everything. I don't know what you thought of me a few years back, but here is what i thought of you. You were a criminal and were not good enough for my daughter. But now i can see clearly how happy you make her, so welcome to the family and treat her well. _**

**_Carl Costello._**

"What did he say? Bart"

He said that he didn't think very highly of me a few years ago but he now knows how happy i make you and he is glad you have found happiness after all you have been through and he also told me that i should be welcomed into the family with open arms, see, i say just in case she didn't believe me.

"I love you Bart"

I love you too Jas more than words can describe, and we will be together forever, do you want to go and see Riley and everyone?

"No, i can't face them right now; can we just stay here tonight?"

Of course we can. I reply as she snuggles into me and fall asleep, snoring very quietly. She is so beautiful; i think to myself don't ever let her go again. And as i look at her i know we won't ever part, because we love each other and with love we can get through this. And i pull her closer into me and kiss her gently on the tip of her nose and drift off to sleep.

I slowly open my eyes, it is dark, the candles have burnt out and Jasmine has gone. I reach for my phone and look at the time 1.13 am, where could she have gone at this time of the night? I grab my jacket and i pull on my boots, boots i know Christmas present from Jacqui, i opened it early as she had gone off to Spain with Rhys for Christmas, thought i should wear them just once to make her happy. I yank open the door of the shack and i walk out into the snow, looks like people will get a white Christmas they were wishing for.

I run around the woods so many times i get dizzy, calling Jasmine's name over and over again. I knew i would lose her, she is way too good for me and she knows it as well as i do. I circle the trees once more, this could have been so romantic on Christmas morning in the snow, if your girlfriend hadn't just found out her dad had committed suicide. He could have waited until after Christmas, given his family at least one nice Christmas in hollyoaks. I sink into the snow and begin to cry, which i when i hear it, the hushed sounds of somebody else's tears not my own. Jasmine's tears to be exact.

I follow the sounds and find Jas sitting on top of a 'hill' covered in a duvet and sobbing staring out over the town watching the snow fall delicately on tops of houses.

Jas, i say, are you ok. Stupid question Bart, stupid question how do you think she is feeling? I shuffle over to her and peel away the duvet and sit down next to her, i wrap my arms around her shoulders and she places her head on to my shoulder and lets the tears spill down her face, seeing her makes me cry. So we sit there together looking out at the snow on the 25th of December 2012 at 2 am crying when we should be happy and asleep together. But life is never that simple in Hollyoaks.


	12. Slightly Less Than Peaceful

**This is going to be a really short chapter xx**

**Chapter twelve: Slightly Less Than Peaceful**

**Bart POV - i really like writing from Bart's POV**

I managed to get Jas back to the shack that morning i can't imagine how she must be feeling, her life is so difficult and i just feel as though it is my fault. But i know that she would say it wasn't and that she would just completely break down, and vanish into thin air. I think deep down ... i sat watching her sleep for hours and i didn't go to bed myself just in case she started to wonder off again, i promised myself i wouldn't let anything bad happen to her. Not when i have only just got her back into my life. And i know that we shouldn't mention too much of the past as that would be too hard for her because then she would have to come back to the present where everything has changed. We will live from now on. Like the past years never happened i think that is best.

Jasmine awoke from a slightly less than peaceful sleep at 5.27 am; we said merry Christmas and then sat together for ages, saying nothing just staring at a newly lit candle underneath a blanket on the floor snuggled together. It felt as though nothing could ever break us and yesterday had never happened well the middle of yesterday, because some of yesterday was amazing but memories of that day will always be tainted with the memories of Seth informing Jasmine and i of Carl's suicide.

Jas and i decided that we would spend Christmas together instead of facing our families; i got Theresa to bring us some breakfast because i knew i could trust her, and i have to say Jas and i had a lovely day for all the events that have been thrown at us over the past years. We stayed in the shack all day together we watched a Christmas movie on Jas's new phone, i think it was called _the greatest store in the world _i used to love the film as a kid, it features S Club. And then we listened to Christmas songs and had a lovely Christmas lunch again courtesy of the divine Theresa. It was quite romantic for her dad dying and all that. And then we both went our separate ways, i think the next few days will be hard for her with me away with the McQueen's and all that.

**Soz i said it would be short and i wasn't sure what to write for xmas day as so much drama had already happened and i doubt that Jasmine would be up for doing much!**


	13. Isn't It A Bit Early?

**I know the last chapter was a bit shit, but i couldn't really do much it will get better from now on.**

**Chapter thirteen: Isn't It A Bit Early?**

**Ok so we have skipped a few days what with Bart being 'away' and all that so it is now New Years Eve.**

**Jasmine POV - don't judge her OK!**

I know that it has only been a week since Carl's death, but i am kind of over it, don't judge me, i hadn't seen the man in over a year and i hadn't properly spent time with him in about two so it just feels like he is still in America we are having a funeral for him on the 2nd of January so really until then i should be alright, but i do not know about afterwards.

**Knock knock.**

I open the door and there is Bart looking as sexy as ever and me in my PJ's, well i say PJ's i mean huge tee-shirt and boys underwear. Bart is probably gonna kill me for still wearing dude's underwear!

"Hey hot stuff, i love the PJ's even the underwear!"

Or not then. That is always good.

Come in and come through i was just about to grab a shower but you can stay if you want?

"Sure i do, and maybe i could join you?"

No i am good Bart, call me crazy but i actually wanna wash when i am in the shower!

"Fine, maybe next time. So how have you been?"

Actually i am doing well, Carl's funeral is on Monday and yer, that's about it. What about you? I call out to him as i get undressed and turn on the shower. I can guarantee he was peeking at me through the slit in the door.

"I am good, it was nice to John-Paul, he informed us of how he and Craig got a divorce."

What i said running to the door, then i heard him laughing and so i stopped, grabbed a towel a pushed the door open, what they got a divorce. I asked putting on my concerned voice.

"Oh" was the reply i got, and my answer, tell me the truth Bart McQueen and i might... i said loosening my grip on the towel.

Bart's eyes widen, and he says "ok, Jas you got me, i lied; John-Paul and Craig are great and are adopting a kid together.

I began to drop the towel Bart looked hilarious so i had to. That was to tighten the towel and run back into the bathroom, lock the door and get in the shower. I got out the shower after about ten minutes, i dried myself wrapped myself back up in the towel and walked towards the door. I pushed it lightly and i saw Bart sitting there next to my desk, where my laptop and mirror sat, he looked very depressed.

What is wrong Bart i asked sounding concerned.

"You lied to me Jas; you used your assets to trick me."

I could see he wasn't trying to be funny or clever here and was genuinely hurt at what i had done, he had only wanted a bit of fun with his girlfriend, he was entitled to that wasn't he. I knew how to make it up to him.

Come here Bart i said walking towards him, and i dropped the towel to my feet as he walked into my arms and placed his hands on my waist. I sunk into him moving my hands round his back and placing them on his shoulders, we stayed like that for a few minutes. Then we broke apart so i took his hand and led him over to the bed, falling onto the bed and pulling him on top of me, i slowly removed his shirt as he was kissing my neck.

Bart flops onto the bed beside me, "wow" he says "what is the time" erm... 8.15 pm i reply we have been in here for a while i know. But it was fun wasn't it? "Fun, no Jas it was amazing, fucking amazing."

**ARHHHHHH**

That was the next thing i heard. "Jas, was that you" Bart asked sounding scared, very scared indeed. No, No it wasn't me. "Well who else is here Jas?" Bart quizzed. Oh my god Mitzeee. Mitzeee is here. I completely forgot Bart.

"JAS" Mitzeee screamed in pain "Jas, i need you" she hobbled towards the door and opened it, "Jasmine i need your help, Oh hello, Bartholomew. Sorry i have always wanted to say that. Well if you two would kindly finish now i need to go to hospital"

"Jas can you drive me?" ERM... yer, yer i can forgetting that i had a license for a moment.

Call Riley Bart, now please.

"Sure thing, i have a question, just a quick one?"

Hurry Bart please hurry.

"Yes, Ok, isn't it a bit early?"

He's right Mitz two months or there about.

"Don't you think i know that, i am just trying not to panic, keep calm is what i have been told, to stay calm, that is the key!"

**Calling ... Riley **

_**Oh Riley please pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up. Riley oh thank god, drop the footie with Ethan, Mitzeee has gone into labour!**_

_**From Riley's POV (just the phone call)**_

_**Incoming call ... Bart**_

_**Hello**_

_**Bart, what do you want?**_

_**Why, why should i just drop footie with Ethan, the baby Oh My God, it is too early, i will be there soon as.**_

**Mitzeee's POV - probably the best choice as it is her in labour **

**Oooo Ouch Ouch Ouch Ouch Ouch Ouch** this hurts, nobody said it would be this painful.

"Really did your mum never tell you, she told me plenty of times?"

Yer well my mum was never very hands on, even you know that much Jas.

"Yer well, at least you still have yours"

Look Jas i am sorry and i want you in there with me, please?

"Ok" – After i (Jas) saw the look on Mitzeee's face i knew i would have to say yes, but i ain't exactly thrilled about the idea.

"Hello, Mitzeee my name is Carl Johnson and i am going to be delivering your ba-"

Is there anybody else, it is just you have the same name and look sort of like my cousin's late husband.

"Oh well, there is doctor. Katie Bishop and Nurse Lynsey Nolan to help if you would feel more-" That would be great, thanks for being so understanding.

"Mitzeee i am afraid you won't be able to give birth naturally, we feel it is too dangerous for you, we are going to have to perform a caesarean instead"


	14. Bart Is A Part Of Our Family Too Now

**RIP CARL or alternatively RIH (rot in hell) xx**

**Chapter fourteen: Bart Is A Part Of Our Family Too Now**

**Riley POV - hurry up Riley!**

Can't you put the blue lights and sound on Ethan, this baby is two whole fucking months early, he/she could die!

"I am sorry Riley, you know i can't" - then i (Ethan) saw the face of my best friend, worried, anxious and distressed. "Fine, just this once" Ethan sighed.

Lucky for them nobody saw and they got to the hospital twice as fast as they would have done, driving the normal speed limit. ANNE MINNIVER i screamed at the woman. "Ok sir, if you would please calm down" was the response i got, calm down. Calm down my baby was going to be born two whole fucking months earlier than expected. That isn't normal.

"I'm sorry sir there is no one here under that name" that was her second response.

Try Mitzeee then, with three e's. I snapped back wondering why the woman didn't know this already. I cursed myself for saying ANNE why should i be so stupid, wasting precious time.

"Ah yes sir if you go down the hall and take a left and then a right" thanks i mumbled trying to be polite.

"If it's alright with you dude i think i am gonna bop off now?"

No, i mean please stay, you're my best friend i need you, you can help me stay calm and all that shit.

"Totes dude, if you need me i am here for you"

**Incoming call ... Doug**

**You take it Ethan i can't talk right now.**

**Doug it is Ethan, shut up and listen not now Doug Riley is at the hospital trying to find Mitzeee, she's having the baby, yes now you idiot. Bye.**

Jasmine, Bart where is Mitzeee?

"The doctor took her off to have a caesarean"

**3 hours later**

Guys you can come in now.

In came Jasmine, Ethan, Bart and Seth who had rushed to the hospital as soon as he found out.

Meet your little niece, Heidi.

**Jasmine POV - love her!**

There she was, so small and tiny all hooked up to machinery struggling to breathe on her own. But still, she was perfect in every way. She had Mitzeee's eyes and riley's nose and ears. Poor child, she will have a pea head, just like her dad.

"Jasmine" Mitzeee called out to me

Yer i called back, "Can you grab Bart and Ethan and get over here please. Oh and get Nancy on the phone!"

Of course i can. That was my reply. Bart, Ethan. Mitzeee wants to see us. Just then Nancy and Darren burst in carrying flowers and balloons.

"Ah Nancy you are here finally come here and give us a hug" Mitzeee sat up slowly and reached out to Nancy.

"RIGHT, now you four are all here could the rest of you leave please? Riley and I have something we would like to ask you all. Babes you wanna tell em or should i ?"

"You can do it babe."

"Well the thing is" Mitzeee began, she began to tear up so Riley carried on instead, "We would like you four to be Heidi's godparents, if you would. Obviously we feel bad about not asking Seth, but Bart is a part of our family too now and well we personally think Jasmine will be a great role model for Heidi and you 2 are our best friends and we want you to be a part of our lives more than ever now, plus it means you get to help out more!"

Riley. I exclaimed, i am totally choked up and don't know what to say except yes and thank you so much.

After the news, Bart and i made the decision to go back to the pub and think about what Mitzeee and Riley had asked us. And to have some alone time together, what it is New Years Day after all and we missed midnight and welcoming in the New Year, so we would just have to make do with 2am instead. Bart and i arrived back from the hospital and sprinted up the stairs. Bart went and sat down on the sofa, as usual, while i got us some drinks, champagne as it was News Years. As soon as i had rested the glasses down on to the table Bart pull me down on the sofa next to him and began to unbutton my jeans. When the door bell went.

**Ding dong**

"Ignore it" Bart whispered "For now it's just me and you." He was so close to my ear it tickled and i began to laugh, as did he. He carried on through the laughter lift my top over my head and throwing it across the room.

**Knock Knock**

The person was really hammering at the door now and shouting at us. "Open this door or i swear to god i will break it down myself, i know you're in there with some girl!"

The cheek of it – some girl, i was his girlfriend!

"You go Jas" Bart called out quietly as he ran to hide behind the door. What a coward, i thought to myself.

Alright, Alright i am coming i said as i unlocked the door. It swung up and in front of me stood a girl, about my age with long dark brown hair and green eyes.

"Oh, so who are you then?" she asked me, there was a look of utter disgust on her face. "His little bit on the side? I want to see him, where is he?"

Bart is over there, i sighed pointing at the door. I was hurt, no completely devastated that Bart had been cheating on me, i would get the details from him later.

"What are you talking about, who is Bart?" that was the girl's reply. I breathed a deep sigh of relief; i can't believe i had thought Bart would have cheated on me. My happiness was short lived though. "Carl, is who i came to see, where is he?"

Who are you? I asked the girl, i had these conversations with so many women over the past years we all had, all Carl's affairs came knocking sooner or later. Demanding something or other. "i'm his girlfriend, Elise, who are you?"

I can't describe the look that came over my face, shock, disgust, concern and anger, maybe a mixture of all three. Dad moaned about me dating Bart, somebody my own age, when he was now dating somebody the same age as he puts it, his little baby girl!

His daughter Jasmine, and i am afraid i has some terrible news, you may want to sit down, i informed her slowly moving her towards the sofa and placing her on it. You obviously haven't heard and i am sorry to have to tell you this but Carl is dead. He committed suicide on Christmas Eve.

Her face went white and as she stood up, she collapsed. Once she came back around, she said "I got a text him but i thought that it meant he was seeing another woman. So i came over to look for him."

Well sorry, he's dead, the funeral is on Monday. If you want to come, be back here Monday at 9 am.

"You don't seem very sad" was her next response, this came with a puzzled look on her face. My reply was this.

Yer well the bastard deserved it, if you knew what he was like, i am sure you will feel the same way i do. Remember 9am Monday the 2nd, now if you would be as kind as to... i gestured towards the door.

Where were we, i walked over to Bart and wrapped my legs around his waist, he moved his arm across the table, knocking its contents to the floor in the process and he then laid me on the top of the table.


	15. We Forget All The Good Memories

**Sup - seriously explain in more detail, when you review otherwise i can't help x**

**Ok, so you guys probably won't read this chapter for a while, but i got bored so i wrote it and uploaded it now anyway xx**

**Chapter fifteen: We Forget All The Good Memories And Only The Bad Remain With Us.**

Monday the 2nd of January 2013, is a day i will always remember, it will always be remembered as a good and bad day within my mind. Bad, because i buried my father, the second of my two parents, my mum Heidi as you know by now was murdered by her father in October 2011. Her death hit me way harder than my father's he didn't matter to me as much as mum. Although we didn't get on most of the time, she was my mother the second most important person in my life and that won't ever change. It will also be known as a good day because it was the day when all of my family, what's left of it anyways heartache can finally stop and our hearts can at long last start to mend. As without Carl Costello in our lives we can't be broken, he has and always be the cause of the heartache of the Costello's throughout our entire lives. But now it's over and we can move on and begin all over again. Like none of it ever happened, it may take time but slowly we may be able to get through it, together. I will start at the beginning.

"Jas, come on we got to start getting ready soon." Riley called out to me.

Bart gave me a small poke in the shoulder and spoke softly. "Come on Jas, he's right you got to get up soon. So why not now?"

Tired, sleepy. Good night and goodbye. I believe that is what i said; i mean i was tired i don't remember much at all from that day.

I got up and was in the bathroom, applying a smidge of make up by 8 am, pretty good going for me! Bart surprisingly was already washed and dressed. And was helping so much, by sitting in front of the TV watching a bit of TOWIE. God i hate that show i much prefer MIC - made in Chelsea, for those of you who dunno what that means! We always get into arguments over which is better. I usually win! I choose to go for lots of kohl eyeliner today as it was a funeral and just a bit of gloss, simple yet somehow according to Bart sexy.

I went into my bedroom and pulled open the doors of my wardrobe, and wondered what to wear, Bart walked in and suggested i go in what i was wearing. As according to him i looked 'reem' whatever that means?

I can't go in what i am wearing Bart you thicko, it's a funeral not a strip club and i said this because, my hair was wrapped up tight in a towel and i was in my underwear, plain black as usual. Then again i suppose it was appropriate - black that is and it would certainly annoy my dad one last time! But sadly no, i wore i knee length black dress with black opaque tights and boots, suede as it was still winter and very cold. I grabbed my coat and removed the towel from my head.

READY. I call out to Riley, Seth and Mitzeee.

"Oh Jas they left ages ago we are really quite late, you spent ages picking out what to wear which is most unlike you."

Ok, do i take it Elise never showed up?

"Did you really expect her too?"

Yer kinda she came from America to see him, she really could have come to his funeral.

"Come on we should get going, we can take my scooter, give it a good run?"

Fine, if you want. I replied a little less than happy tone to my voice.

We arrived at the church; the ceremony itself was quite emotional, quite a bit of crying actually even from Riley. And the actual burial itself was really distressing; i didn't expect to cry as much as i did, my tears spilled over my face and splashed on the coffin as threw dirt over it, as well as the hat i had worn as Jason. I'd kept it as a reminder of a part of my life, but i didn't need it anymore and it symbolised a bond between dad and I. It was time, time to let go of the past and move on through to the future and that was without Jason, mum or dad, but with Bart. So in this respect the day itself couldn't have made me happier. But saying goodbye was one of the hardest and saddest things I've ever had to do.

We had a memorial thingy after the service, which despite the circumstances was quite joyful, it was a celebration of Carl, which seems odd as we - the Costello's only remember the bad things about dad. There were many good things as well which we can tend to forget so easily. It is wrong, completely and utterly wrong we forget all the good memories and only the bad remain with us.

Within the memorial we had a montage of Costello family photos, which Gem and I had put together, everybody cried, it was extremely touching. The whole day was emotionally draining for me. Then Riley and Seth gave speeches about dad, which everybody laughed at and cried about. Then we had a special playlist of some of dad's favourite songs and songs that fitted the situation too. **Some included songs were:**

**No one's gonna love you – Band of Horses**

**Make you feel my love – Adele**

**Forgiveness – Wretch 32**

**Sweet disposition – The Temper Trap**

**This is how it's meant to be – Emily Barker and The Red Clay Halo**

After everyone had gone home to bed. Riley, Seth, Mitzeee, Gem and I sat in the pub and watched old family home movies. We didn't go upstairs until about 5 am and by that time i was so tired i just about managed to remove my dress before collapsing onto the sofa and falling asleep.

**2 pm the next day**

I get awoken from my deep sleep by Mitzeee throwing a pillow at my face. "We know you have a great figure Jas, unlike some of us, but there is no need to show off!" i knew what she meant, me in the living area, underwear and long black boots. Not to mention the massive panda eyes from all the rubbing my eyes and crying i did last night. I snap back to reality, grab my dress and the boot that had fallen off during the night, probably from all my tossing and turning. And scarped quickly into my bedroom. Where i locked the door, walked into the bathroom tore of the rest of my clothes and climbed into the steaming hot shower.

I emerged about an hour later feeling completely refreshed and ready to do something active today. "You took your time" Seth turned around in the spinney chair. "You wanna go do something?"

Like what? I asked, it was as though he read my mind. "I have an idea, but i want it to be a surprise. Ok?"

Sure, do you wanna ask Riley and everyone? I enquire, please say no, i was only asking to be polite – that is what i was thinking and it was as though Seth read my mind again.

"Nah, we haven't had any twin time in ages, so let's go just us, and i think Riley has some plans to sort out anyway." He smiled, i smiled back i love our twin time; we always go and do something really fun. I've been away so we haven't done it in so long, so it will be good to do something with Seth again.

**Seth POV - not sure if i have done one yet, if i haven't i will regret it as i should have done, love him, he's amazing.**

Right well, were here.

"Where are we?" Jasmine asks looking completely baffled; it was the most hilarious look ever.

Well, Jas we have gone to the outdoor activities centre, to go rock climbing.

"Really? Yay i love rock climbing, and i haven't done it in such a long time, and i have no idea why not"

Wow she seemed really happy about that, i expected her to be happy but not this happy. I am so pleased, she needs cheering up, yesterday was really difficult for her, and she won't ever actually admit how hard it actually was.

We climbed for what felt like days, ok it was only a few hours, but i was absolutely shit at it, Jas was amazing at it. She always has been, she would have made a great lad, and well she did until whatever happened. She won't say which is odd as she tells me everything, literally everything. It gets really annoying sometimes. Anyway back to the rock climbing. I don't know how many times i hit my head on that first wall, i was still on the first and Jas was already on her fourth. I just kept smashing my face into the wall and i turned upside down as well. Still it was an interesting activity, i mean we always do interesting activities on our little twin trip outings, we've been: canoeing, abseiling, raft building, trampolining and bungee jumping. Next i think we will try sky diving, Jasmine has been wanting to do it for years. Me not so keen, but i will give anything ago once, so we'll see.


	16. Men Are So Predictable

Chapter sixteen: Men Are So Predictable

So it is now mid January with just over a month until me and Seth turn 18. I don't know about Seth but I am so excited. It will be my first birthday when actually wanting to be a girl. As long as i don't get stupid girly presents (except i won't mind if they are from Bart) i should be fine. But more important than me turning 18 at the moment is the romantic trip to Venice Riley has planned for Mitzeee. I know what's gonna happen, Riley is a man they are so predictable. It sounds and feels so weird and strange saying that but it is true.

Over the weekend, so me and Seth have the place to ourselves and we are throwing a party. I will finally get to meet his first girlfriend! I am actually more excited about that to my birthday!

I have been trying to get some information on her out of him, but he is really defensive whenever i bring it up. He said he will introduce us this weekend, and that he thinks i am able to 'handle' it now. And he also said he only hasn't said anything before now because he was trying to protect me from harm. He makes me assume the worst about a situation, i suppose then i am always pleasantly surprised with what i find.

**Friday the 18****th**** of January**

Ok so the party or as me and Seth have said to the 'grown ups' if you can call Riley and Mitzeee grownups. They are bigger kids than me and Seth, and that's saying a lot! Well any way we told them it was a social drinking session with a few close friends, meaning Bart, me, Seth and Seth's new girlfriend (whoever she was, if she even existed) obviously we didn't tell Riley or Mitzeee about the other 50 or so guests arriving at the pubs after hours.

I went to see on the Friday as well we had decided to have a quite night in before a 'social drinking session' the next night. We ordered a pizza and watched a movie. I got to choose which is fine, as i am not the one who goes for the sad rom com's in blockbusters. Not me that's Bart, he loves a good chick flick – The Holiday or P.S. I Love You is his favourite! Me? Well i am more of an action type a girl. I am more A-Team than He's Just Not That Into You. I choose midnight meat train. (another Bradley Cooper film). Bart for being a 'man' – his words not mine. Doesn't have a manly scream, it is more of a shrill. He hid behind his sofa the entire time! I couldn't get enough of the pulling out of teeth and finger nails. Not to mention all the bodies strung up like meat. It was so brilliant. I love that kinda shit.

I swear to god when they pulled out Leon's (Bradley Coopers) tongue at the end, Bart actually threw up, i know it was mean but i couldn't help myself i had to laugh at him for being such a girl and hit the rewind button! It is safe to say that Bart didn't eat much of the pizza during the film. He stood there looking at me; i was on my fourth slice of margarita. He couldn't understand how i could eat while watching some guy scoping out a dead persons eye balls. I can eat through anything, and by anything, i do mean anything. After Pizza we moved onto ice cream. I reminded me of the time me and Bart skipped school and ate Myra's ice cream on his sofa.

**Flashback**

"Who needs chocolate fudge Sunday?" Bart said strolling cockily over to the McQueen freezer and retrieving his auntie Myra's rum and raisin ice cream.

"when you can have auntie Myra's rum and raisin" he says chucking the tub at me, i laugh half heartedly to be nice; i don't really like rum and raisin ice cream.

"yer pistachio, that's my favourite" i tell him as i scrape the bowl clean of ice cream and wait from him to finish his.

**Present day **

the film had just finished and Bart went to the freezer to grab the ice cream, "how much you want Jas?" Bart calls out. Erm dunno same as you babe. "Right then 2 massive tablespoons each it is then!"

He brings the bowl over to me. What flavour is this? I ask. "Erm what's your favourite Jas?" pistachio. I say nodding. "Good i remember correctly then" Oh Bart it has been over 2 years since i said that and you remembered, awww that's why i love you. "Awww thanks Jas, i love you too" and he kisses the top of my head and tells me. "your taste in ice cream fantastic. Your taste in movies... well that isn't so good" we put on another movie but fall asleep together on the sofa, before anything good actually happens.

**Saturday the 19****th**** of January**

Mitzeee and Riley are leaving at 4pm to catch their flight, well Mitz thinks that they are going for a early meal so that will be a surprise i hope Riley catches it on tape. And after that there is gonna be a lot to do, so will you help us? Bart is too busy watching some crappy that programme grand designs to be interested in me. And he moans about my choice in TV and Films. He's 17 not 70. But i love him anyway. BART are you listening to me? "Yer, yer sure catch it on tape, lots of work, can i help. It is not only girls who can multitask you know Jas, i can listen to you babble and watch TV too"

Oh i babble on too much for you do i? Well then don't bother helping, in fact don't even bother coming tonight. I am officially uninviting you! I shout and storm out of the house. I turn around and ring the doorbell. "Yes?" Bart asks. And i also want to add you scream like a girl. I slap him hard across the face and storm off in a huff.

Why? Why is it like this with me and Bart? One minute were all good and the next were shouting insults at each other. Are we destined to be like this forever?


	17. A Brave, Kind, Thoughtful Person

**Chapter seventeen: A Brave, Kind, Thoughtful Person.**

**Bart's POV**

I had to do something to show to her i was serious about, more serious than i have ever been about anybody in my entire life i took out my phone, it was so old and scratched now but i couldn't bear to part with it or change my number, just in case. In case she had called, texted or emailed me. Just in case. I scrolled through my messages and there was that text from Jasmine Costello on the 29th of October 2010 and 1.31 pm: I'll always be here Bart, love you x. But she wasn't always here for me she left me and i wasn't gonna let her leave again.

**9.50pm**

The party would be massive by now but i had no choice i wanted Jas back, so bad i would do anything for her and i hoped this would say and show her that. I walked to the pub, i nearly turned away the nerves were terrible but as soon as i saw that beautiful face at the window i couldn't turn back and i know i had done this before, but i didn't mean it then. This time was different, this time with Jas i truly meant it. I began to sing. No backing just me, solo.

**I can make you happy**

**Make your dreams come true**

**Nothing that i wouldn't do**

**Go to the ends of the earth for you**

**To make you feel my love **

**To make you feel my love **

**Jasmine POV**

Oh BART you cheesy bastard, do u think that, this second hand crap is gonna work on me, i am not Sinead just because you sing to me doesn't mean i am just gonna forgive you, i should never have just jumped back into your arms last year. Because of all the shit you do, you make me feel like crap half the time and you don't listen to me. You only take notice of me when it suits you and i am sick of it! Do you hear me i don't want to be with you at the moment. Understand no jasmine and Bart it is now JASMINE and BART we are separate people 2 individuals who can't work together as a couple no matter how hard they try, but are good as friends.

"Yer, Jas friends – with benefits!"

"good one" shouts Jono, Jono i punch him hard in the arm.

"Jas?" Sinead calls me, i will be back hold on. What Sinead? What did someone break? Nobody broke anything, except your heart, i can see that. He did it to me to. She pulled me into Seth's bedroom." You two go together Jas, but you can't function together, separately or as friends. What did he do this time?" He told me that i babbled and talked too much. "really! That it?" yes that's it. I say confused. "Ok, Jas listen to me and listen carefully. You love him, that's clear and he loves you so much, everyone can see it. I got it before when you were Jason and he kept going on and on about Jasmine, but things have changed, he says u babble, he's right you do. A lot! That's no reason to break up with him. You are the love of his life; he would literally do anything for you. Sure he has used the singing gag before, but it was still beautiful and romantic and i am sure he has something else planned as well." She gave me a quick kiss and moved for the door, she was still holding my hand i let her drag me towards the door even though i would have much rather stayed away from the crowds. I didn't know any of the people and i have never felt so lonely than i have done tonight in a crowded room.

She stopped just at the door turned around to face me and pulled me closer. She placed her hand on my head and reached up kissing me on the lips, i kissed her back for a brief moment before snapping back to reality and realised what i was doing i pushed her away and wiped my mouth.

What the fuck are you doing Sinead your with Jono?"

"It is you Jas, you have this affect on people. You can turn the straightest of guys gay with just one look. I love you, ever since the moment i first laid eyes on you, i thought she is such a brave, kind, thoughtful person. That's why i was so mean to you because i couldn't take it that you didn't want to be with me and you didn't know how i felt. I never hurt you because i hated you. I did it because i loved you!" she tried to kiss me again. I pushed her away, and walked out the door, straightened my top and removed the heels i was wearing, holding them by the straps in my hands i ran down stairs.

Sinead had done me a favour and put everything into perspective for me. I love Bart and was never going to change, i ran down the stairs through the pub, unlocked the door. And i ran at Bart and jumped he caught me. With me around his waist he was about to kiss me, under a full moon and no stars how romantic. Ok so i probably shouldn't have jumped on him as he staggered backwards and we both fell in into the water. But i was so happy; nothing was going to change that. Bart pulled me in close and kissed me softly on the lips, it was the best kiss i had ever had until...

"Bart, long time no see. Who's the girl?"

I recognised the voice, the girl's voice.

Bart kept his expression neutral as he turned me around and told the girl: "You remember Jas right?"

**please review and have a guess at who the girl is, if you have a better idea than me i may use your idea. Although mine is quite interesting and i think very unexpected xx **


	18. You Have To Suffer To Look Beautiful

**I have decided to do a long chapter on getting ready for the party and Mitzeee and Riley too.**

**Oh and check out my new story BARRIERS OF HATRED co-written by GirlWednesday it is... different than others about JART to say the least and i am enjoying writing so please read, enjoy and remember to review xx**

**And just for your information, to make the story realistic I looked up flight times from London to Venice xx**

**Chapter eighteen: Sometimes You Have To Suffer To Look Beautiful**

**Jas's POV**

**Saturday the 19****th**** of January - 3.58pm**

"Come on Mitz the taxi will be here in a minute!"

"We're only going for dinner i don't know why you're so worried, and couldn't we have gone later?"

"No we can't Mitzeee, it is a really expensive place and this was the only time they had, i have spent a fortune on this Mitzeee, i may be a footie player but i don't wanna be broke before i even get started!"

"Can you please tell me where were going?"

"Nope"

"One clue?"

"Fine we have to travel to London that's why we're leaving at four because this is the only place that was doing this deal, ok?"

"Yup I'm good we're off to London Jas!"

Good for you. I say walking past them looking less than impressed; i pull Riley to one side. Riley can i speak to you for one moment please?

"Sure thing Kiddo"

What are you gunna do about her clothes, she will go mental when she gets to the airport and-

"Yer that's what i was about to ask ya, can you pack at suitcase for Mitz, mine is done and underneath the bed"

But i don't know anything about clothes!

"another Taxi will be hear in half an hour tell the driver to take the bags to Heathrow terminal 5 and that i will be waiting and i will pay him! Thanks Jas mwah"

He gives me a kiss on the cheek and so does Mitzeee. Then they close the door behind them. And i Jasmine Costello am left in the middle of the living room alone, for the first time in a while wondering what fuck i am supposed to do, i know nothing about clothes, well not ones Mitzeee would wear. If only mum was here, she would be able to help me.

I collapse onto the sofa and grab my phone, my lovely new shinny galaxy mini. I love this phone, i start to wonder whether or not i had done the right thing this morning, going all mad at Bart. I mean it wasn't anything like the arguments we had when we were together before. This was nothing compared to them. No i am gunna stick with my decision i was sick of being messed around. Well no more. Though he hadn't come round to the pub to see me yet i had expected him to. Then i snapped back to reality the suitcase shit i have 20 minutes until the taxi arrives. I dial the only number i can think of to help me at a time like this.

**Calling ... Sinead**

I know Sinead, not the wisest decision but the only one i could think of.

**Sinead hi, don't hang up, i need your help, Riley has taken Mitzeee to Venice as a surprise. Yer it is lovely. Yer, Yer. I wish i was there too. Anyways i have to pack Mitzeee's suitcase now in 20 minutes the taxi will arrive and i have no idea what to pack i don't know clothes, and well i was thinking who knows clothes? You were the only person i could think of. Yer sweet i know, thanks. So will you help? Ok 5 minutes thank you Sinead. Bye.**

**Sinead POV**

**Calling ... Mads**

**Hey babe, it's Sinead, i need your help be at the dog in 5. Explain later. Love you too, mwah.**

**Calling ... Tills**

**Hey hunny, yer good you? Oh that is great news. Talk later right now i need your fashion skills meet me at the dog in 5. Bye.**

**Jasmine POV**

I open the door and there are four smiling faces staring at me. Sinead, Maddie, Tilly and ... George?

George what are you doing here? I asked very confused, i mean i understood Maddie and Tilly but George really. Mitzeee is probably now gonna hate these outfits.

"Yer i was with Tills and wanted to tag along, is that ok?"

Fine i need all the help i can get.

We wandered upstairs into Riley's room. Sinead and Maddie went straight over to Riley's bed and flopped down onto it. (i didn't expect anything less from them) they started nattering about Riley, showers and whether he slept in Pyjamas or not.

I dragged Riley and Mitzeee's suitcases from underneath the bed. Riley's plain black and Mitzeee's well i dunno where to start. Probably in the middle, there was a massive picture of her face printed on the suitcase!

Ok let's get started we have about 10 minutes.

"ok well i think this goes nice with that and OH with these shoes" Maddie beginnings "Are you mad girl those shoes are strictly summer only" Sinead chimes in. "Mitzeee won't care. She just wants to look good. And she knows as well as us sometimes you have to suffer to look beautiful" Tilly states, as though the others should totally know this information.

Me. I just sit there bored out of my skull, the worst ten minutes of my life. And probably the best of George's he loved all of Mitzeee's hats and scarves. The doorbell rings. I run to answer it and as i leave i remember to shout. Don't forget the makeup!

"THE MAKEUP" they all shout simultaneously and rush to fit it inside the already bulging suitcase. Tilly kindly drags the suitcases to the door and we help the man carry them to the taxi i tell the man take the bags to Heathrow terminal 5 and that a man and a woman will be waiting and that they will pay him.

Well, i turned to the little group of people staring at me. Thanks for all you help. "You're welcome" Sinead told me and with that she gave me a light hug and walked away. Are you guys not gunna follow her? I ask politely wishing they wouldn't leave. I didn't want to be on my own. "Oh no we aren't leaving yet" Tilly said in an informative way, sensing i didn't want them to really leave yet. She seems to realise everything "we're not?" Maddie questions Tilly. "Nope Tills is right we have a more important matter to deal with now" George began "we know what happened with Bart this morning, he told Mads, who told Tills who told me, who is now informing you that our group is rubbish at keeping secrets" he finished. Dragging me inside the pub.

**Mitzeee POV**

Riley tell me what is going on. Why are we at Heathrow Airport? I calmly ask him, even though i am quite angry but also excited. Looking back i dunno why i was angry, why else would i be at an airport i was obviously there to do one thing which is definitely better than a fancy meal.

"Mitz, I hate to have to say this but we're not going for a fancy meal. Instead i am taking you on a first class flight for the weekend well Sunday and Monday, travelling back on Tuesday to ... Venice!"

YIPEEEEEEEEEEEEE

"I take it your pleased?"Riley asks shaking his head.

I am definitely. Wait what am i-

"Uh Shh, it is sorted, everything done" Riley tells me stepping out of the taxi and paying the driver. I grab my bag and follow him. What do you mean i have no luggage! I scream at him, i mean was he not thinking straight - Venice with no clothes!

Then as if on cue, a taxi pulls up asking for a Mr. Costello. Riley wanders over gives the driver a wad of cash and pulls 2 suitcases out of the back and with that the taxi drives away. I make my way over to the doors when Riley says "Where are you going, get in here" pointing towards a limo. We then make our way to our own private plane!

... I want to say something but no words are coming out of my mouth. "Are you a little bit shocked?" That is a huge understatement babe! "Well, here drink this" he says passing me a glass of champagne.

By the time we arrive in Venice at 10 o'clock at night or there about. And it was more beautiful than i could have ever imagined!

**Jasmine POV**

No there is no way i am wearing that! And stop putting stuff on my face Tilly. Just stop it! Bart and I are over, except that fact and he isn't even coming tonight! So i don't know why your bothering.

"That's where your wrong Jas, i spoke to Callum, who spoke (yes spoke) to Neil, who then told Jono to tell Bart that he should come tonight!" Maddie explained to me.

Fine alright but i am not wearing a pink, tight fitting dress. I will wear jeans. And you are not to cake my face with makeup. Those are my terms. Are you able to follow them?

"YES" shouted Tilly

"Certainly" Maddie claimed smiling, showing off her perfect and pearly white teeth.

"Eh..." Tilly looked at George "but" Tilly gave George one of her famous stares "Ok, i will try" George said finally defeated. Tilly jumped up and pounded the air with her fist, signalling her triumph over George.

"Ok, so how about this top? With jeans of course" Maddie asks

It is a bit short isn't it? I ask her. Well actually i tell her, the top doesn't cover my belly button, i am no Tilly i can't pull that off and i ain't comfortable in it either, i don't wanna look slutty either. Not that Tills ever looks slutty!

"Fine" Maddie moans pissed off that i don't want to wear he top.

"How about this?" Tilly asks. Tilly i am not a slut but i am not i nun either! Seriously guys is something that covers my stomach but doesn't down to my knees too much to ask for?

"Ok neither of them were you, this isn't either but it is better than the others. Try it on before you say anything"

Ok i walk towards the bathroom to get changed. "Where you going?" Tilly asks me. To get changed, i say pointing at the door. "Oh My God, just do it here, we don't care" Maddie says and by the tone of her voice i can tell she is getting pissed off with me.

Fine. I pull my top off to reveal a plain sports bra. "Ok, that's it!" Maddie shouts, storming out of my bedroom as i pull the top over my head Tilly follows her out. Was it something i said? I ask George as he straightens the top. "Nah, she will get over it. Take a look in the mirror, don't i have great taste?" i have to admit the top looked great i was black, lacy and covered my stomach. "Oh and put these on. They tie the whole outfit together" he said passing me a pair of black heels.

**Meanwhile outside...**

**Maddie's POV**

"Mads wait up" Tilly shouts "what's wrong?" she asks concerned as she catches up to crying Maddie. "Look Hun, your mascara is gonna run if you're not careful!" Maddie manages a small laugh in amongst the sobs.

How he fancies her, and not me or Sinead, who actually look good and are girly and stuff- she trails off. "Oh Mads, loved you, you know that, you just stop wanting the same things and Sinead. Sinead was just a rebound fling. He loves Jas because of her personality. He doesn't care about dress sense, he is a boy none of them do... except George" and they both laugh. "Boys only care about what is underneath the clothes, you know that better than anyone" yer and that's not great either, she is gonna be 18 in a month and she wears plain, boring, not at all sexy underwear like that? "well then give her advice, don't storm out" i know, i know Maddie says through the sobs. Thanks Tills you always know what to say Maddie exclaims quickly hugging Tilly and running back upstairs.

**Back inside**

Wiping her eyes she enters Jasmine's room, you look great by the way, Maddie tells Jas while rifling through her underwear. But we need to do something about the underwear hunny, George leave us alone for a bit will you? Come on get it off and put this on chucking matching underwear set at her, Jas had completely forgotten she had. See much better Mads said pulling Jasmine towards the mirror now get dressed and we will begin on the hair and makeup!

**Riley POV**

**I have kinda skipped to Sunday for these two now! Jas and Bart and friends are still in Saturday.**

**Sunday the 20****th**** of January – 6 ish (in the evening)**

**Phone conversation between Riley and Trish **

So i have made a plan, we are going on a Gondola and we are going to pass under the Ponte di Rialto and that is when i am gonna ask her. So what do you think? Auntie Trish? Are you there?

_Oh Riley, it sounds... perfect, wonderful, and amazing. I just wish i could see her face when you ask her!_

I am glad you like it i have been planning this for months. And i am giving her mum's ring.

_Seriously oh Riley, that will mean so much and don't worry about Heidi, she is fine back home with me. Do you want me to check in on the twins?_

Nah, they are having a few friends over and you'll just-

_Yer alright i get it. Bye Hun i hope she says yes!_

Bye Trish, bye bye Heidi.

_She says bye bye back._

Mitz, hunny get ready we gotta go soon, we are going for dinner then a surprise. And by dinner i mean dinner.

"Ok, be out in a minute" she shouts adding a coat of mascara to her already heavily coated eyelashes. She stands up smoothes down her dress (there was a note attached saying to wear this one?)And walks towards the door. "Ready" she calls out to me. You look- wow i am speechless.

We walk out of the hotel suite and down to the restaurant. We eat and chat a little and as she is about to walk back to the room, i grab her hand. You haven't forgotten about the surprise have you? I say as i pull her to the exit. Come on otherwise we will be late.

We walk a little way down the 'road' and Mitzeee stops looking in all the shops windows and 5 minutes later coming out with 10 bags. "Alright, i done" she says holding her hands up looking at my expression. I walk her down some little steps and place her on a Gondola. "Oooo Riley this is so romantic. I love it. Oh wow is that the Ponte di Rialto? It looks even better than the pictures." I sit there staring at her "What?" she asks confused by the appearance of my face. "I know Venice i have wanted to come here since i was 15!" right now i understand, and i say pulling out my mum's ring as we are about to pass underneath the bridge. Mitzeee look at me. I laugh. Will you marry me? I begin in a more serious tone. I love you so much i know that i want to spend the rest of my life with you, and i hope you want to spend yours with me. I finish, almost out of breath.

"YES, of course i will" she smiles as she leans forward to kiss me. I move next to her on the Gondola and put my arms around her waist, kissing the top of her head as shuffles closer to me.

**Jasmine POV**

"Come of Jas you need eyeliner"

"Maddie's right" Tilly and George agree.

"It will make you eyes, just amazing" George adds.

Fine, alright, i trust you, just remember don't make it all cakey.

"When Tills does my face ever look cakey?"

"Never" Tilly states.

"What are we gunna do about this?" George asks lifting up my hair and tossing it round my head.

"Well, i think we should keep it straight" Tills says. I agree, i chime in.

"Jas shh, you have no say in your hair, it wasn't in your terms and conditions. No, curls it is different like she has made an effort."

"YER, i see what you mean" Tilly says applying lip gloss to me. And George begins to part my hair into sections as Maddie lifts up the tongs and moves the closer to my hair.

"Ok, go and look at yourself in the mirror" Maddie instructs, Tilly shuffles behind me spraying my hair. My hair is curled but not poufy curls, more Maddie curls. So flatter, i like it. And my face doesn't look cakey at all, considering how much crap they put on my face, they had gone for subtle lips and cheek and then just black eyeliner and mascara round the eyes to really make the 'pop' according to George. I had to admit i felt great!

Well it is nearly time people will be arriving soon...

It has just gone half nine, everyone is here and i am bored, people keep coming up to me saying how great i look, the one person i want to be here isn't.

"JAS" the voice, i recognise it. It's Bart i whisper to Tilly. Maddie is nowhere to be found, probably off with some guy. Tilly and me went to the window and were immediately joined by a curious Jono and a angry Sinead (nothing new there, always angry where Bart and I are concerned).

"JAS, there you are. WOW, you look amazing and different. If this new look is for me you don't have to do it, i like you just the way you are" BART what do you want, i am jumping around going Yay Yay Yay he came to the party Yay Yay Yay and i love Bart McQueen well that's inside but i regain my composure, so it looks like i don't care, so as not to look like a complete nutter in front of everyone.

**Sorry, this chapter is quite long i got carried away with Jasmine; she was only supposed to pack the suitcase and then go. Oh well i like her too much for her not to be in the chapter xx Please Review xx and don't forget to read and review BARRIERS OF HATRED co-written by GirlWednesday xx**


	19. Sometimes The Truth Is

**Ok so i am back to the end of chapter 17.I kinda back tracked a bit to show Mitzeee and Riley's days but then got carried away with Jas. Quick recap below:**

**Bart comes to the dog, Jasmine doesn't look pleased to see him, however she is she just doesn't want him to know that, because she needs him to know he can't treat her the way he does. Bart sings 'make you feel my love' to Jas. She runs off, Sinead runs after her and convinces her Bart is being romantic and he loves her etc. Sinead reveals her true feelings for Jasmine, they kiss but Jas ends it and goes down to Bart outside the pub and they fall in the water together. They are kissing when a surprising and 'uninvited' guest shows up. In this chapter you will find out who they are. The last few lines are added into this chapter.**

**Sorry that was so long xx**

**Chapter nineteen: Sometimes The Truth Is Stranger Than Fiction**

**Jasmine POV**

Bart pulled me in close and kissed me softly on the lips, it was the best kiss i had ever had until...

"Bart, long time no see. Who's the girl?"

I recognised the voice, the girl's voice.

Bart kept his expression neutral as he turned me around and told the girl: "You remember Jas right?"

"Jas?" the girl replied confused. "As in JASMINE COSTELLO?"

"Yes, well done you remember!"

"Well of course how could i forget" came the sarcastic reply.

And a hello to you to Fern. I can hear you, you know. I am right here. I tell her pointing at myself.

Her lips are pulled back in a diabolical grin, Jasmine long time no see. And my haven't you changed since the last time i saw you. Weren't you a boy at my trial? What happened to poor Jason, i like him. she tells me her face pointing slightly upwards, her tongue poking out of her teeth ever so slightly. I may have changed but she certainly hadn't, she still had frizzy orange hair, a massive chest and she still wore clothes that were about two sizes too small for her. In fact when inspecting her outfit closely, i could see it was the same outfit she wore when she stabbed Bart. And i know i am not interested in fashion but even i know that more than one piece of denim in an outfit just looks stupid!

Shut up Fern, i resort to that phrase again. I don't know how many times i had said that to her during the course of our 'friendship'.

"Hold on" Bart chimes in. "Didn't Seth say his girlfriend was coming tonight?"

Oh shit, no please no, is this what he meant by protecting me. from FERN!

"Wait, that's not possible she's a lesbian, forget what i just said" Bart laughs.

No, Bart she could be, remember that school disco with the foam she was Seth's date.

**Flashback**

I am dancing along to the music with a glow stick and a drink, it isn't what i wanna be doing but it isn't too bad. I am thinking it would be so much better if i was Jason, and with Bart.

Bart walks past, he isn't gunna speak to me i have to make the first move.

"You having a good time" i ask in a friendly manner, i am dying inside for him to say no it is shit i wanna be with you Jason. He doesn't, he stands there hands in his pockets like he is talking to Ricky or Taylor.

"Ah, i will be" he turns and faces me; a smile appears across his face.

"You with anyone?" i ask struggling to contain myself and make small talk with the guy that broke my heart.

"I beat them off with a stick, you know me" he basically means NO, but that he doesn't want to associate himself with me. Even still i can't help but feel a little elated that he hasn't yet found someone new. My face clouds again when he walks away without saying another word.

Seth walks towards me.

"What you smiling at?" he asks, my face returned to a smile when i saw him. Alone.

"The fact that your date didn't show gut-ted" i tell him truthfully.

He leans in to my face smiling "she's right behind ya" i turn around quickly to see who my brother's date to the disco was. I stop dead, Fern.

"Surprise" I turn around and look at Bart, he is getting a drink, and he looks as worried as I do.

"What are you playing at Fern?" i ask her calmly.

"I'm on a date" she looks at me with a kinda duh what does it looks like expression on her face.

"With my brother, you're a lesbian" i say really getting angry now.

**Present day**

After that i say to Bart, she told me she'll date anything. So she could be Seth's girlfriend!

"Well there is one way to find out." Bart says pointing at Seth as he walks out of the pub. Firstly though we should get out of here. And we laugh, we climb of the water dripping wet, we walk over to Seth.

"What have you two been doing?" he asks us confused. "A late night swim?"

Long story, what is Fern doing here? I thought she got put away? Is she your girlfriend? I bombard Seth with all these questions.

Erm... i dunno what she is doing here, she got put away but now she has been let out good behaviour. He leans in closer and lowers his voice, good behaviour, doubt that, i heard she shagged one of the prison guards. And as for her being my girlfriend, i wouldn't do that to you not after the history you two have and there is fact of her being a lesbian and not liking guys!

"Ok, so if she isn't your girlfriend mate, who is?" Bart pipes up, i think him and Seth have become matier recently with us being together and all the Christmas drama we've had to deal with.

Fern waltzes over to us, and Seth walks away and calls out "She isn't here yet, when she gets here i will tell you"

"what is so strange is that your back to being Jasmine after all you said and did as Jason, that's what i don't get" i can't hold it in any longer. My fist clenched, finds its way to her face. That isn't a new experience but at least this time nobody thought i was a psycho, who went around hitting girls. I bend down over her face, push the frizzy red hair out of her eyes and tell her.

Sometimes the truth is stranger than fiction. Especially here in Hollyoaks. I kiss her head. I don't want to see you again, ever. Now leave! She scrambles to her feet and runs off round the corner.

I reached for Bart's hand and we entwined his fingers around mine, as we walked back into the pub. Never looking back and never seeing what was happening behind us.

**Any other guesses as to who Seth's secret girlfriend is? xx**


	20. Heartless

**Chapter twenty: Heartless**

**Jas POV**

We entered the pub fingers entwined blissfully unaware of the happenings around the corner. We dodge round all the people in the pub, Sinead is behind the bar with Jono pouring drinks for everyone. We slide past a couple on the stairs and push through the crowded living room towards my bedroom. Once inside i slide the bolt across the door and play my IPOD, the music outside is terrible.

Bart stands still for a minute staring out the window i slowly proceed to join him, leaning next to him with my arms on the window sill and my head on his shoulder. "Isn't it beautiful?" Bart sighed. The evening was misty and moonless. No not really. I reply, walking away from him. I hate it when he gets all soppy and mushy, it was cute at first: the lights in the trees, the dancing in the rain but it is never ending. It is like the Bart i knew a few years previously doesn't exist anymore and i miss him. "What's up Jas?" Bart turns and grabs my arm "Is it Fern?" I jerk away from him and begin to peel off my soaking wet clothes. That bitch? No, i inform him firmly pulling clothes out of my wardrobe, there isn't much in there, i take out some jeans i used to wear as Jason, i liked them too much to discard them and then threw a plain black T-shirt over my head, i almost looked like Jason again.

I flopped down on the bed beside Bart. Hey get off my bed in those wet clothes! I say shoving him to the floor laughing.

"Fine then" he takes off the mustard yellow jumper, the same one he wore when he ran away with Sinead and told me: **I STILL LOVE YOU, AND I DON'T KNOW HOW TO STOP** - they were some of the best words he has ever spoken to me. I really hate that yellow jumper it has always been about two sizes too big for him and the colour, don't get me started on the colour. He shakes off his jeans and climbs under the covers pulling me under with him. I start laughing as he kisses me and i can't stop, Bart pulls away "Seriously though Jas, is it Fern?" I stop laughing. What doesn't he get about NO? What doesn't he understand? I sit up and turn to face him. "Call me Heartless, but it's about time someone shut that bitch up for good. After all nobody likes her... least of all me!"

"ALRIGHT, alright granted she hasn't made the best choices, don't you think we should put our past behind us?" No, i don't. I scream at him pushing back the covers and sliding on my shoes. I pull on a jacket and tug fiercely at the sleeves. She blackmailed me Bart and stabbed you. It is about some time someone did something" I yell at him yanking the hood over my head and stomp towards the door, i tear back the bolt and pound down the stairs, wrenching open the pub door. Bart follows me "Please Jasmine, don't do nothing stupid, JAS!"

I run towards the skate park, there is no one there i can see that clearly, but i continue to wander around looking for her anyway. "Jason" a voice says behind me. "IT'S JASMINE!" I shout back turning around angrily steaming over there to give them a piece of my mind; it is only when i reach the person that i realise it isn't Fern. I stop dead still just in front of her face.

"Babe, why did you walk off?" I hear Seth say from behind me, he walks past to and kisses the girl. "Who's your friend?" she just points towards me. I pull my hood down and taking out my hair. "Jas don't do nothing stupid" Bart calls to me running over. He skids to a halt when he sees my face.

"I'm so sorry Jas, i didn't mean for either of you to find out like this" "Anita?" Bart queries "Your Seth's girlfriend?" "Bartholomew, no track suits i see, good choice. And you two finally got together properly" she says jumping up and down clapping "I always knew you would" she exclaims with a smile and another clap. "Hey!" Bart jumps in "What was wrong with the track suit bottoms?"

"They made you look terribly chavy" She laughs. She points at me "I will see you tomorrow we have a lot of catching up to do" she smiles again and walks off. "Sorry" Seth says chasing after her. It's cool. I shout back."That was a shock" Your telling me "Come on babe lets go back to yours everyone will have gone by now, it's late" Well i do need some sleep, it has been an eventful day! "Awww, i thought we could do something a bit more fun!" Bart whines at me, chucking his arm around me and kissing my cheek. As we walk back towards the pub.


	21. If You Could See Me Now

**Hey guys just some little updates xx**

**Chapter 20: was really short i am sorry, i was gunna write more but i did it at school and i kinda got really cold so instead of writing i just snuggled up with Hollyoaks August 2011 – the Jart cellar episodes of course xx **

**If anyone has ideas, queries anything just message me or review i will find a way of getting back to you. Let me know what you think of Seth and Anita i would like to know what you really think and whether Jasmine and Anita should go back to being friends or not xx**

**And to Emma 3 : there isn't bad blood, he was just worried about his sister as she has been through a lot and Anita left Jas during the middle of the hardest part of her life, so there is bound to be some tension between the two of them. And since Anita is like a really close friend she might find it hard to accept, Seth basically just wanted to wait until the time was right as he knows Jasmine should be happy with her own love life before he drags her into his. Sorry that was a long explanation, i hope your enjoying the story so far xx**

**And to everyone please read my other story barriers of hatred – the first few chapters are of Bart but it is really fun to co write it with GirlWednesday xx**

**And please review obviously not this 'chapter' but the rest, i love reading your reviews and replying back, if i can xxx**

**The title of this chapter and the last were those of really great books, read them! xx**

**Chapter twenty one: If You Could See Me Now**

**Anita POV – new person, new chapter, new POV**

Seth woke up at around 10 i had already been up for hours; planning what i would say to Jasmine last time i saw her she was a very unhappy girl who was convinced she was a boy and now a couple of years on she is back with Bart and very happy, i just don't know what to say to her. I mean where do i start that conversation? Maybe i should let her speak first, yes that's what i will do, i am sure she has had to do it countless times before so once more can't hurt. Can it?

I am now sitting in college coffee with Seth, it is 11 o'clock and Jas should be hear any minute, this is my third latte Oh My God, i am sitting her nervous about meeting one of my best friends, why am i nervous she is just a regular person right? Seth kisses me goodbye and goes to Jono at the counter, Seth is taunting him about his secret smooch with Ruby last night, and it was so cute. I mean it would have been if it weren't for Sinead, you know Jono's girlfriend, catching them, apparently i heard she slapped him because his hands were a little to south for her liking, so she dumped him. She was used to Jono's antics as he was as Neil puts it "a babe magnet." And now she was tired of him game so she chucked him. Although the other story is she has found some else and has been cheating on Jono for much longer. I doubt if any of this is actually true but still gossip is gossip. Jas arrived minutes later and looked as what i can only describe as windswept her hair was all over the place and she still looked amazing! This may sound a tad...Lesbian ish but she looked hot, she was wearing jean shorts knee high socks, boots and Bart's mustard yellow jumper, yes the same one he was wearing last night, she can't have been at her own home!

**Jas POV – to explain her unusual outfit **

Ok so we arrived back to mine last night at about 2 am and the pub was still crowded we asked a very giddy Tilly to close up soon and went back to Bart's and well... you get the idea. I wake up at like 10.30 way too late to go back home so i borrowed some of Theresa's clothes, couldn't for the laugh of me pick out one of her tops so i picked up Bart's and i left the house after kissing Bart bye and him telling me i had always looked 'REEM' in boys clothes, i took this a compliment even though i was sure what he meant. And well i literally ran all the way to college coffee.

**Anita POV **

Hi, i say shyly as Jasmine takes a seat opposite me, you look great.

"Really i haven't been home yet i stayed at Bart's the night and well you know the McQueen girls all their clothes are too revealing. So i opted for Bart's instead, though i have always hated this jumper!"

Nah, you look fucking great, but i really think we need to discuss a few things, don't you?

"Ok, right after i get a drink" she says and jumps up making her way through the tables towards Jono. She returns moments later with a hot chocolate and a chocolate muffin. "This muffin free from Jono, because i look totes hot today, i could get used to this" i laugh this isn't the Jasmine i remember flirting the boys, staying the night with the boyfriend, wearing tight and extremely revealing shorts. I remember the scared fifteen year old boy trapped in girl's body who spent their time binding their chest and cutting their arms with a compass.

Please will you now tell me what has happen since i left, with you i mean?

"Well that's a massive, huge in fact category. Ok well you remember Riley was with Mercedes right?" i nod they were not right from the beginning they were just kidding themselves thinking that it would work. But Jasmine wait. "What?" I know all of this the baby, your mum, your dad. What i need to know is you!

"Ok, well after mum... you know... i told everyone here i was going to America with dad, but at the last minute i jumped out and stayed in Chester. But not Hollyoaks, and the only person that knew was Seth, then Bart saw me in town and well i came back and we got together. Then on Christmas dad committed suicide and we found out he had been seeing this girl Elise, back in America. She was like my age, it was so weird and then Fern came back last night and we told her to get lost and now you, oh and Mitzeee and Riley got together, had a baby and Riley is gonna propose to her in Venice today"

Awww how romantic, i didn't know about the baby Seth never said, what are they called.

"Well it is a girl and her name is Heidi and me, Nancy, Doug and Bart are the godparents. She wasn't supposed to be born until February but you know us Costello's drama before we are even born!"

So what happened to Jason? I had tried to lead up to it gently but i couldn't hold onto it any longer, it was eating me up inside.

"No no, you and Seth first"

Well, i came back from Middlesbrough, to Manchester to see Eva and then this must have been when you were away, because i came back and spoke to Seth asking to see you and-

"You came back here looking for me?"

Erm.. Yer you were like my best friend, i mean we were so close; i haven't ever kissed any of my other friends before, apart from Newt. But he was actually a boy and whatever yes i came back to see you. And that is when Seth said you weren't here so i said i would wait, and then he told me i wasn't allowed to see you hoping i would just leave, but i didn't i then i said Heidi may be your mum but she can't keep you locked up forever.

"Oh dear"

Oh dear, is right, he broke down in tears and told me everything except, he told me you had moved to America to progress with treatment, not exactly the truth, and then before i knew it we were kissing and then we went up stairs. I thought it was just gonna be a one night thing, and then he called and i texted and wham, here we are 5 months later.

"5 months!"

Yer, he told me in December after your dad's funeral, that you were back and he said i couldn't come over anymore because he wanted to tell you when the time was right, because of all you had been through and that, and i agreed. That was until i saw you yesterday that is why i was so shocked i was expecting Jason, a real man not Jasmine and Bart! I mean you and Bart, it is amazing i always knew someday, somehow, somewhere. But before i saw you two together, it's just so... romantic! Cus last i heard he was dating that slutty bitch Sinead, who went out with Gaz! I still can't believe that.

"5 months, he kept it a secret for 5 months; i mean we texted everyday and talked on the phone for ages. He had been keeping it from me since like September!"

28th of August actually. I came down during my summer holidays and have stayed put ever since. I corrected her, i know that doesn't help things but dates and times are always important.

"Well, if you two are serious about each other then, i can't do anything to stop it can i. I am happy for you Anita, you can't find a better bloke then Seth, he is great so kind and generous. He always puts other people's feelings ahead of his own. Look at me going on and on. Feel free to shut me up any time soon. "

Can i? Sorry it's just i am sure Seth wants to say something as well. I point behind her at Seth, i will leave you two alone then, i am so glad i caught up with up Jas, meet up soon i want the full download on Jason and Bart.

"Wait" she says running after me. "Can we just do it now, before i totally bottle it?"

What about Seth?

"I am sure i will see him tonight to discuss things"

Ok sure then, i say linking arms with her and walking to one of the ramps in the skate park.

"Ok, right let me completely finish before you say a word. You got it?" Yup i got it. I confirm. "Well, i never really went to America and i so badly wanted to go and see Bart and confess everything to him, but i just couldn't bring myself to do it. I just couldn't. I don't know why i stopped being Jason, for a while i didn't wanna be anyone, i just stayed inside speaking to nobody. Then i was in the shower a few days before i saw Bart again and i realised that i was actually comfortable in my body for once, i don't know exactly what happened and despite what mum used to say, it wasn't a phase. But i don't think i ever knew what i truly wanted. I thought JASON was who i really was but then i just didn't know. But when i saw Bart again all these feelings came rushing towards me and i discovered who i truly was, Jasmine. And not matter what that won't ever change, and i think Bart does love me for who i am boy or girl. Jasmine or Jason. He loves me either way he just may not admit it. But i have decided that i am well and truly Jasmine Costello."

That is wonderful Jas, i am glad you thought about my advice, even if not on a subconscious level.

"What advice was that? i seem to remember getting lots of 'advice' from lots of people"

Well i believe i said:

**BE WHOEVER YOU NEED TO BE BOY OR GIRL. **

And i will always stick by that Jasmine, if you ever need anybody i am here for you, always! I hugged her and walked off hand in hand with my boyfriend Seth Costello, the most wonderful man on the planet and the second best and most inspirational person, he comes right after Jasmine, i don't think anybody will beat her, she is truly one amazing human being.


	22. Eating Chunky Monkey Ice Cream

**Sorry this is a bit of a in-between chapter which i could really do much with xx **

**Chapter twenty two: Eating Chunky Monkey Ice Cream**

**Jasmine POV**

I had been a few days since my coffee with Anita and Bart and i were sitting on the couch watching love actually Seth and Anita had gone out for dinner and we had decide – well we kinda didn't have any money so there wasn't much we could do, to stay in and watch a movie. I don't know why we chose love actually, i mean it is us, we aren't exactly romantic movie fans. But i snuggled further into Bart's chest while eating chunky monkey ice cream, pistachio may be my favourite but this comes a very close second!

We were just at the really good bit, where Hugh Grant is knocking on all the doors to find the girl he loves. When Mitzeee and riley carrying the cases stormed through the door wrecking our night. "All i wanted you to do was to stop the guy from harassing me, is that too much to ask?"

"I suppose not" Riley sighed, he knew by now to just agree with Mitz. That way you don't get the massive argument or a black eye. Mitz had kindly giving Riley a huge thump round the face last time. He knew not to do that again, the press had a field day.

So? How was it? I ask excitedly, way too eagerly for me but i was really actually interested this time for once in someone else's life other than my own. I know i can be a bit selfish sometimes but i dunno it is just me, and i can't change that and believe me i have tried so hard.

"Ahhhh", Mitzeee squealed, "you should have seen it Jas. It was wonderful and we have some news." she waggled her hand at me. Oh My God, i never saw this coming! I said trying to act all surprised. "I know, i know me neither" Mitzeee giggled, obviously too happy to realise that i had known all along.

She got up from the sofa and joined Riley who was now standing in the kitchen, they stood there standing over us as they prepared to tell us all about the wedding, Riley looked about as bored as i did. And Bart, well he was already sitting up putting on his shoes.

Oh no, if i have to stay and hear all about it. So do you. I hissed in his ear, smiling slightly. As i pulled him back towards me.

"We have set a date for the wedding" Mitzeee exclaimed "It is next week"

I shot up next week that was so soon!

"And Jas i want you to be my bridesmaid!" Mitzeee said. And the look on my face must have been worse than i thought it was.

"Please it would mean so much to me?" she looked heartbroken as she sat down next to me, flinging Bart off the sofa in the process.

Fine, ok i will. I sighed, i felt bad i am sure it wouldn't be too bad. Then again this is Mitzeee we're talking about.

"Great, i have brought you a dress already. So you will be pleased to know you don't have to go dress shopping and i have called Jem and she is coming up at the week end as well and we are all going to travel down together!"

Travel where exactly?

"Well" Mitzeee began "Ever since i was little there has always been one place that has meant so much to me" Enough with the anecdote Mitz, Jas doesn't really care she is just trying to be polite! Riley interrupted. "We are getting married on the Isle of Wight" "it is a really beautiful church and the hotel is lovely too!" Mitzeee butted in. "It should be i am paying enough for it" stated Riley.

And at that moment Seth and Anita came stumbling through the door, kissing.

They jumped apart the moment they saw Riley, me, Bart and Mitzeee staring at them.

Seth proceeded to walk through sit between me and Bart on the couch and steal the ice cream from my lap and starting wolfing it down like an animal. I don't know what Anita sees in him. she was still perched in the doorway shyly fumbling with her bag, something she always did when she was nervous.

As they continue to inform Seth of their plans completely ignoring poor Anita, and as Bart and i exit the flat i can't help but wonder if Riley knew about Anita already or not. By the time i was downstairs all i could hear was Seth shouting, something about the marriage most probably and then a dining room chair came crashing down and landing about an inch from my feet. I may be completely wrong here but i think Seth was angry.

**A week later... **

**28****th**** of January**

**Bart POV**

I left my chaotic house and made may way over to the pub only to discover that it was even worse there than my own house Riley was at footie training – on a Monday afternoon, he is ridiculous and therefore Mitzeee was taking the opportunity to try on her very expensive wedding dress. Jem was helping her and Jas was supposedly 'helping' too – although this statement is only true if you count sitting on a sofa drinking champagne helping. Her face broke into a smile as soon as she saw me. she patted the sofa indicating for me to come sitting down, i very nearly walked back out again but i decided to relive some of her pain by joining her. I don't know what i was thinking. Let us just say now that Jas, alcohol and expensive things do not mix.

"The wedding is in three days" Mitzeee cried "How an earth am i going to fit into this dress in three days?"

"That will teach you not buy clothes that are two sizes too small from now on!" Jem informs Mitzeee.

Well i like the fact your clothes are tight Mitzeee, they show off your assets very well. I piped up. "Oi, you" Jas punches me on the arm really hard "That is my cousin you're talking about how would you like it if i said it about one of yours?" she clearly hadn't thought her words through. Well all my cousins round here are girls, so i would either be very happy or slightly worried depending on how serious you were of course. I laughed, she could be so adorable sometimes her face clouded with confusion over what i had just said. Don't worry babe, i was only joking. I say her puzzled complexion now starting to irritate me.

"NOOOO" Mitzeee wails "I will fit into this dress, even if it kills me"

"Well if it kills you then you won't need to wear it, and we can sell it and keep the money!" Jas isn't helping the situation much, and i take Mitzeee's expression as a cue for me and Jas to leave.

Come on Jasmine; let's get out of here and do something fun. "No, i like this it is fun" she says bouncing on the sofa champagne sloshing over the sides of the glass onto the expensive Italian leather sofa. No come on, you have had way to much of that i say trying to remove the glass from her hand. "NO!" she shouts yanking her hand out of my grasp and as she does so the champagne goes flying from the glass all over the front of Mitzeee and her expensive wedding dress.

Mitzeee screams as she falls to the floor clutching her wedding dress in both hands. "He He, who is she the wicked witch from the wizard of Oz. Melting when liquid touches her?" Jasmine giggles. I can't help but laugh to she was quite right Mitzeee was acting a bit dramatic, even for Mitzeee there was hardly any champagne even in the glass anyways. But that is Mitzeee for you always over the top.

"I'm melting" Jas squeals, her impression of Mitz.

"Get that bitch out of here, she has ruined my wedding!"

Come on Jas time to go now. I say dragging her towards the door.

"NO, I'm melting help me I'm melting! Ha ha, your wedding is about you and Riley preparing to spend the rest of your lives together, you AND Riley not just you. Think it about"

She is right you know, not about the melting but everything else. I declare, closing the door to avoid the airborne champagne glass.

**Jem POV**

"Oh, Jem what am i gonna do?" Mitzeee mumbles through the sniffing and sobbing. "My wedding dress is ruined! And i know their right but i just wanted something special for me AND Riley."

He would marry you in a paper bag Mitzeee. I say, and do you know why? I ask her. It is because, i beginning, i put my arm around her and pull her in close stroking her hair. It is because he loves you, just remember that and. Look at me Mitz, i say turning her face towards mine. He loves you so very much and you love him too, and that is all that matters. Understand?

She nods sniffing "I just wanted a big wedding that everyone would remember" she cries "nobody will remember us otherwise, the model and the footballer, big shock" I know Mitz, i know. I pull her in close for a hug, she reciprocates this and hugs me back.


	23. Newlyweds First Kiss

**Chapter twenty Three: Newlyweds First Kiss **

**Seth POV**

"Get the fuck out of my way, i need to get ready!" My ever so polite cousin screams at me. Then Jasmine my increasingly always kind sister barges past me on the stairs and wanders into the bathroom oblivious to the fact that Mitzeee was about to go and do her thing in the bathroom. "Oi bitch, i was next" Mitz shouts at Jasmine. "Calm down, i will only be a minute, bitch!" Jas shouts as equally loud back. I do love living here so very much. I should probably explain why in god's name Jas and Mitzeee are up at the same time in the morning. It is 6 am and we are all getting ready to travel down to London to pick up Mitzeee's new wedding dress then going on from there to Portsmouth to get the ferry to the Isle of Wight, it is a fucking long journey for a wedding. But then again this isn't just anyone we are talking about here. It is Mitzeee with three e's the girl who changed her name to Mitzeee with three e's i mean what was she thinking?

**3 hours later... **

Mitzeee finally emerged from the bathroom after having been in there for two and a half hours! And we are finally on our way to London, by we i mean me, Jasmine, Bart (i am surprised they are allowed to come to pick up the dress after what Jem told me), Mitzeee and Jem. Apparently this dress is nicer than the other one not that i care, not that anyone in the car actually cares. But mitz keeps going on and on completely unaware to this fact!

**Another 3 hours later... **

We materialize from the wedding shop stuffed full of cake (Mitzeee refused to give any of us except her and Jem champagne – i have no idea why though) and luckily not empty handed. Then more driving and a ferry which was the most fun part of the day and me, Jas and Bart were feeling really childish and ran around the ship playing hide and seek, i know. I know terribly juvenile but so much damn fun! Then Jas has to ruin our fun by getting sea sick and insisting that Bart go and sit down with her instead of having fun with me. i stormed off in a huff and still being childish got lost and ended up leaving the boat with some German family that looked similar to my own. I eventually realised when they hadn't said a word in English to me. it was one of the more eventful trips of my life. Mitzeee then decided once we were there she didn't want to get married in the ugly church and we had to rush around and find somewhere that would do a wedding ceremony in one days time, the locals must have thought us mad.

**The day has arrived...**

We checked into our hotel the Shanklin hotel, in Shanklin and to our luck we found that we could have the wedding there, thank god! Mitzeee does give this family some tough times.

"Seth, honey have you seen Bart?"

No mitz i haven't sorry why?

"Oh, i just have a favour to ask of him that is all. Could you go find him for me?"

**Bart's POV**

I am never going to another wedding ever in my entire life Jas, they are terrible!

"What not even ours?" she asks me completely shocked by what i have just said.

Do you think we will get married then? I say putting my arms around her, she can be so cute sometimes.

"Of course Bartholomew, why would we not?"

Just it is a long way off in the future you know me i live for now not for the future, not after i became completely shocked when i was planning our future back in 2010. You really kinda ruined my plans Costello.

"Oh Bart, i am so sorry i was just, well you know confused and everything" she starts to cry.

Oh no please don't cry i didn't mean to make you cry. I say wiping the tears from hers eyes with my sleeve. Come on we best go get ready and i hear that Mitzeee is looking for me. so i best go see what the bride wants, cus this bride always gets what she wants.

"Oh Bart there you are" Mitzeee comes running up to me panting, "Your gonna make me all hot and sweaty Bartholomew McQueen making me chase around after you like this where were you- actually i don't wanna know" she stops me before i can even speak.

"Will you do me a favour?"

Of course anything for the bride. I nod

"Will you walk down the aisle behind Jas and Jem holding Heidi?"

Shouldn't Seth be the one to do that? i ask confused

"No, because it is my wedding day and i want you. Plus Seth is Riley's best man therefore he will be standing at the altar with Riley awaiting my grand entrance."

Ok, alright, sure, fine, whatever. She squeezes my arms and tells me to find Jas because she needs to go and get her hair and makeup done. She is gonna be thrilled when i tell her.

I couldn't find Jas so i went to hair and makeup, and i found her. Oddly enough she seemed very content in some many applying lip gloss to her and a woman curling her newly lengthened blonde hair.

"Hi Bart" she smiles at me a lovely warm smile which makes me melt inside, then her head gets whipped back round for coat two of five of mascara. "Do you like the new hair? Or is it too... not me?"

No i love it! It is so different and it looks amazing you look just flawless and wow just wow, wow, wow, wow.

"Ok Bart, i get it. I look good" she laughs as she stands up removes the gown she is wearing and slides on her dress, it is a lovely and i am surprised and relieved to say understated midnight blue dress. And sliver diamante shoes. That's the Mitzeee i know and i love. Jem walks in behind me,

"Awww Jas you look great just great."

"As do you Jem" she smiles, another lovely warm smile. I don't know why she is so happy today.

Then Mitzeee glides elegantly through the door way, i stand there mouth open in complete shock.

"Come on Bart, close your trap i look fucking amazing as usual but really don't go overboard!" she smiles as she lightly smacks the side of my face a few times indicating i should close my mouth.

But i can't, she is right she looks amazing, her dress is long (she picked all long full length dresses which is strange for Mitzeee) an ivory colour with a small amount of embroidery on the front, she wears the same shoes as Jas and Jem and she has a long veil on her head along with a small glittery tiara.

Well i better go and get changed into my tux and i will see you ladies in a moment. I return moments later in a tux and carrying Heidi in my arms she is very a very tiny, very cute version of Jas's dress and little sliver dolly shoes she looks so cute and so much like her grandma, Heidi would be so pleased with her little granddaughter!

We make our way downstairs and into the wedding: Jem then Jas and second to last me and Heidi. Once we are down the front Mitzeee enters with Trish – who is crying, and then Riley turns to look at his beautiful bride and everyone starts to cry. I look at Jas, she looks back to me we are remembering the last time Riley had a wedding and we are praying this one will go better. This makes Jas cry even more because at least at that wedding both her parent were still alive and her family was not yet torn to pieces. She is now in complete floods – not that she wasn't crying loads already, i mean all she ever does is cry. I pass her a tissue and she dabs her eyes, Jem reaches out to her sister and squeezes her arm, she wasn't even at Riley's last wedding.

_I, Riley Costello, take thee, Ann Minniver, as my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part. _

_I, Ann Minniver, take thee, Riley Costello, as my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part. _

Then they kiss and the photographer takes a picture of the newlyweds first kiss.


	24. The End?

**I know i skipped about a month but hey, nothing else happened in the month – so why not skip a few days and make it more dramatic. Please review this is a chapter i really wanna know your thoughts on xx **

**Chapter twenty four: The End?**

**Bart POV**

The 24th of February should have been a happy day for us instead, it was one of the worst days of my life – actually screw that. It was the worst day ever in the history of bad days, this one is a sure winner.

It started off as any other day – well actually that is another lie it was a special day, it was in fact Jas's birthday her 18th to be exact and not that she hadn't had proper nice birthdays before she had. This was however the first one she had, had with me as her boyfriend. We weren't really on great terms for her 16th and well i completely missed her 17th, i thought she was in America – she was really in Chester – you know the story. Anyway back to the morning, it began perfectly but as soon as we left the bedroom it started to deteriorate and it just kept getting worse and worse. I didn't give her a present exactly – i couldn't really top what i gave her for her 16th so i decided to take her away, travelling to all the places she had always wanted to go but never been – after 6th form was over. We went back to sixth form together along with Seth at the end of January, we decided to go back as we weren't allowed to miss anymore time off otherwise we were told we wouldn't be able to sit our exams. Anyway none of that will ever happen now because of that evil bitch – she took her from me, she took the people who meant most to me away from me. She did this. It is all her fault. That bitch. How could she do this to me? I never did anything to her. I just... tried to ... i don't know why she ... how she ... could do this to me. i expected her to be angry but not like this. I hate her, i dislike her with a passion – jas would say. No not this time Jas i physically hate her – for what she did. What she did to us. I hate her with all i have i hate her. I hate...

FERN.

Everyone was so happy that day, Mitzeee and Riley were back off of honeymoon and Riley had been offered a football contract – a really great one – i didn't actually take much interest but anyways. Jas and Seth were given money each and a lot of it. And then Jas and i went to London for the day, i took her to see a west end show and for a posh meal. It was great all lovely and that, then we came back home. We would have stayed but Seth and Anita were throwing a big party so we came back. And that's when it happened; Fern showed up and ruined everything.

**Jasmine POV**

"Come on Jazz, just five minutes that is all i want – all i am asking for is five minutes – i can even come back when the party is over – if you would prefer." She smiled that devious little smile. I played along with her little game, for her sake. I did feel quite bad for her. I mean she always seemed to be alone no family, no friends – not anymore.

"Fine come back later, when i may be ready to speak to you" i sigh, giving up, i was never gonna win against her best thing to do – give her what she wants. Little did i know she wanted to do more than talk.

**2 am **

Bart had gone out with Jono, Neil and Seth. Mitzeee and Riley were round at Darren and Nancy's for the night. And i was alone in the flat, a little apprehensive about Fern coming over but i supposed i thought nothing bad would actually happen. There was a knock on the pub door. My mind flashed back to the last time i was in this situation with Fern: she was blackmailing me about Jason (my secret at that point).

**Flashback...**

There is a knock at the door, it isn't loud but the pub is closed and Jem could have easily heard... thinking back i wish she had heard and come rushing downstairs to help. None of the rest probably would have ever happen.

I open the door, Fern is standing there she strolls into the pub all calm and poised and there is me moments away from shitting myself at the prospect of getting caught stealing money and my painful secret going viral.

"You can't stay my sister is upstairs" i had decided that even if Jem wasn't in that would have been my excuse to get the transaction over as quickly as possible.

"I don't know what you look worse as a boy or a girl" Fern sneers at me, i can't believe her of all people is looking down her nose at me she is such a hypocrite at least i wasn't afraid (eventually) to be who i thought i truly was.

"That for me?" she looks down at my hand and prises the notes out of them. I let her take them hoping she will go straight away, my efforts and hopes all fall short when she goes to sit down at a table.

"You've got to go" I whisper. Getting really anxious now.

"In a minute" she says, flicking through the cash counting it. She knows she can do whatever she likes to me, and i will go along with it because i am so scared.

"I can't believe i trusted you, i never told anyone half the stuff i told you" i knew on some level, i couldn't trust her even when i was spilling my heart out but i just couldn't stop, once i started i didn't want to stop. I had to get it out there and tell someone all my deepest thoughts, feelings and memories. And who better than a closet lesbian, someone who wouldn't judge or look at me in disgust. But as usual i was way off base with my perceptions of people.

She is laughing in my face now. "Maybe this all be your lesson not to be so open in the future" What future, if she spills my secret i won't have a life worth living. I think to myself, and she knows this the selfish cow. And i highly doubt what she says, i am the kind of person who cries at the slightest thing and will spill secrets to anyone that will listen, if given half the chance. Just takes this with Fern as an example.

**Present day... **

Fern strolls in same as before, however this time i am also confident and self assured, she goes around back of the bar and pulls a bottle of beer from the fridge, and takes a swig from the bottle. I snatch it away from her lips as she tries to take another mouthful. She is surprised by this. I slam the bottle down on the bar and it smashed because i brought it down with such force. My hand is cut and bleeding Fern grabs a towel from the side and wraps it tightly around my hand, she is being oddly caring towards the girl who sent her to prison and 'ruined' her life. She clasps her hands around my not bandaged fingers. I pull away, she is doing it again. Trying to be intimate with me, even though she already knows i like men.

"Come on Jas, i love you and i know you love me too. You just can't see it though. But i can it is in your eyes every time you look at me, your face it brightens" she grabs my face with both hands and kisses me hard on the mouth. I push her away. Just like before, and if she tries again i will do the same.

Get off me Fern. I say shoving her out of the way walking past her. I don't love you, i never have and i never will and as for my face brightening every time i see you, that isn't because i am happy, it is because i am so fucking angry with you. For ruining my life. Telling Ethan about Jason, to get you behind bars was the best decision i ever made!

"Well if that is how you feel!"

Yes. It most definitely is!

"Then i am sorry, but i have to do this, because if i can't have you nobody can"

And i feel the knife penetrate my skin and rip through my insides, i can't breathe i fall into Fern's arms. I feel the touch of her moist lips on my head and the sound of her voice in my ear.

"I love you, I'm sorry, it wasn't meant to happen this way."

I fall slowly to the floor, i feel like i am falling through the sky. It is magical the sky is blue with fluffy white clouds and mum is there she is talking to me, just talking and dad too. Just talking, nothing really special just memories of the day they took us all to Warwick castle. It was the greatest feeling ever. Until... i suddenly begin to feel hot, my skin is burning. All of a sudden i see Jason. He speaks to me, he tells me:

"Don't worry Jasmine, all will be fine. Everything happens for a reason. This is for the best"

... Then i don't know, i don't remember. Nothing my mind is a blank.

**Bart POV**

I am wandering round the village half drunk, laughing my head off with the lads. About how Jono wasn't allowed into the club even though the rest of us were and the fact that we only realised an hour later was just the icing on top of the already totes amazing cake.

Me and Seth were eventually the only ones left, so we started the walk back to the dog. And thats when we saw it.

"Holy shit Bart, call 999"

I whip out my phone and punch in the three numbers my hands all wobbly. Hello i need the fire brigade please and quick. Err... the dog in the pond, hollyoaks village. I say my voice begins to tremble with fear. WHAT ABOUT JASMINE, WHERE IS SHE? Seth can u see Jas anywhere?

"No, i will go look around"

I hear the sirens going on and on in the distance, i get more nervous as they get closer and closer, until i can't hear them anymore. The next thing i know is there is a paramedic standing over me.

I fainted, that's all i wasn't in the building. I find myself telling her.

Excuse me. mate?

"Yer son, what ya want?"

Charming this bloke just charming. Well i was wondering if you found anyone in the fire, i think my girlfriend may have been in there?

"No, son sorry we didn't pull anyone out. And if they are still in there, there is no chance i am sorry"

Seth is now standing beside me. he falls onto my shoulder sobbing, i try to hold back the tears but i can't, it is just too much.

_**It has been a year since the fire, the pub was too badly burned to even try and look for a body i have to face the fact that i will never be able to bury Jasmine and that her killer isn't even in prison, the police knew that it was Fern, everybody did but she was let off on a technicality and she just loves to rub that in whenever i pass her in town. Seth and the Costello's found a new place just outside the village, they decided to move as there were too many bad memories here, i still get a message from Seth every so often and last i heard him and Anita had a baby. A son, Jason.**_


	25. Happy Birthday Bartholomew

**Chapter 25:** **Happy Birthday Bartholomew**

**Bart POV**

Everywhere i look all i see is Jas, it has been over a year and everyone else has moved on, but i. I can't just leave her behind she was my life, i keep thinking she could walk through the front door at any moment. I can't and i won't except the fact she is gone and will never return. Seth has Anita and Jason, Riley and Mitzeee have each other and Heidi, who do i have? No one i have no one. The McQueen girls aren't exactly a great source of support they didn't know Jasmine like i did – nobody else in the world did and it is just too hard to carry on without her.

I now live with Jono and Ruby, when i say live with i mean sleep on their couch on the rare occasions when i actually go back at night. I usually spend the evenings getting inordinately pissed and going back with some random girl to whom i will never speak to again or even learn the name of. You may think this is a complete waste of time and that i should get my act together and do something with my life, but the truth is i get wasted to forget block out the memories i have of Jasmine and... Jason. It is how i have made it through the entire year, if i didn't go out and get drunk near enough everyday i would be dead by now.

I wake up with a splitting headache on Jono's couch, to the sound of Ruby singing in the shower. It is terrible worse than anyone even Myra!

"Alright mate, happy birthday!" Jono says punching me on the shoulder as he hands me a card.

I am 19 today. I state as obvious as it is to Jono, he just nods at me.

I feel about 90 Jono not 19 so much has happened to me over the past four years, so much.

"Tell me about it"

Your unbelievable mate your life is literally perfect you found the girl of your dreams. Who may i tell you now for the hundredth time is wayyyy out of league.

"Happy Birthday Bartholomew" Ruby says cheerily thrusting a bunch of envelopes into my hands, i throw them on the sofa next to me beside Jono's – it doesn't feel right this will be my second birthday with Jas and i don't want to celebrate it. The cards will all be ones from Myra and co. Anyways.

"Fine then don't open them ignore your birthday like last year, but i ain't gonna sit here with you moping around – as much as i would love to some of us have to get to work. Isn't that right babe?" Ruby nods drying her hair with a towel. "Bye baby – have fun"

Jono now owns college coffee; Tony gave it to him after he moved away with Cindy and Holly. And Ruby is a sales assistant in some shop in town. Me i just spend the days moping around the flat listening to sad music – which seems to fit mine and Jas's time together.

I get up and turn on the telly and flick over the channels finding something to watch – i settle on old episodes of Made in Chelsea – Jas's favourite show, she loved all the drama and stupidity of it. Just as the 'characters' are jetting off to Finland i here the door slam, Ruby has gone and so has Jono – FINALLY i am alone, i turn the telly off and pick of the pile of cards. And choose a song on the old iPod – skinny love – Jas's fave song.

The cards are from Myra, Theresa and Kathleen-Angel, Mercedes, Jacqui and Rhys, Carmel, Michaela and even my dad Victor. Then there was Jono and Ruby's, Neil and Sinead's, Maddie and Callum, George, Tilly and Esther's. There was also one from all the Costello's – that one made me cry (a lot)

And then one i didn't know it was a normal and average Happy Birthday card (just a card nothing else) and i read:

_BART_

_HAVE A HAPPY 19__TH__ BIRTHDAY_

_X_

I begin to ponder who this mysterious person is who sent me a card.

**Pretty little liars: WANTED: Trapped inside the house, Alison is presumed dead, although her body is never found. **


	26. Flashbacks

**Little notes **

I am sorry for all the recent uploads like everyday kinda thing but throughout February, i won't be posting much, so i am posting quite a few now xx

Thanks for your reviews lovely to know what you think xx

LOL ITS ME: ok people call him Bartholomew all the time (usually when they want to get a message across to him and he isn't listening) and there are great little things called flashbacks which tell you all about the past (which if you have read my story – i would know this if you bothered to review) you would know i like flashbacks and do not try to tell me a massive Bart McQueen and Jason Costello (not to mention others) fan what their personalities are like. And i would love to read a story written by you! And if you continue to read you will get to find out what has happened over the past year. Could say at least one positive thing to be nice. Xx

Please review and tell me what you think i do appreciate it. And yer i just hope your enjoying it xx

**The part of the very long flashback that is in italics didn't actually happen it is just my imagination of JART running wild. Xx and also if you wanna see an actual version of the (funeral) playlist check out LittleMissHollyoaks on YouTube xx**

**Chapter dedicated to the reader Lol it's me – if your still reading – is this enough about the past year for you? xx**

**Chapter twenty six: Flashbacks**

**Bart's POV**

**Flashbacks**

I walk up to Jason along with Sinead and Tilly, i look at Jason the expression on his face and his body language he is sad, lonely, depressed and has some very important news to tell us. Yet i still ask in a completely innocent and confused way.

"What is it?"

Tilly speaks next "What's happened?" she always assumes the worst, then again the amount of stuff Jase went through it was no wonder she always prepared for the worst, i should have done that too.

"Jase?" Sinead says worried – she pretends like she doesn't care but she really does.

"Come on" he says pointing his head in the direction of the centre of the folly – still giving us no clues as to what sort of news he will break although we can all tell that it is something big, huge even. I follow first, i look confident but i am blagging i am so scared not as scared as i have been in the past – trouble seems to follow Jason around and being his best mate i had learnt to deal with that. Sort of.

"You're going tomorrow. why soon?" i ask Jason has just told us he is leaving – but i don't wanna believe it i refuse to think this way. He couldn't and wouldn't do this to me. Would he?

"Tomorrow, the next day. Next week, what difference does it make. Maybe it's better this way. Short and sweet" he says his voice coming over all teary and sad, yet he doesn't cry. Me – i hold back the tears – cus i is a man and men don't cry. Instead i roll my hands up inside my t-shirt, i can't believe he's leaving.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" Sinead reply's. She knows his answer but she still goes ahead and asks anyway.

"This is all I've ever wanted" that's his response. It is a lie. He has never mentioned moving away before and before he came here he wasn't decided on being a boy or a girl. He is still trying to convince himself this is actually what he wants – when it isn't.

"Then that's all that matters. It's just hard to think about you not being around though!" Tilly says tears welling in her eyes – what she is saying is right, but i can't help but think that Jason always only thinks of himself not of anybody else and especially not ME! Even though i only do everything i do for him, mostly to protect him but i love him so much. But it's hard.

"It's gonna be weird" Sinead says believing and accepting what Jase is saying.

"It feels like i have been here a life time, i can't believe it's only a year" Then why i think why leave why now, a lot has happened yes. But your running your just running away, trying to be who you think you are, what happen to the Jasmine inside of you, the feisty blonde girl who never gave up and never said no?

"A lot can happen in a year hey" is my response i can't bear the thought of him not being here, after all we have been through together as a couple (short lived yes but it still counts) and as mates.

"A lot has happened" he thinks the same as me, and that's when i realise. How serious he is, and how much he needs to leave and get away from all the bad and some good memories of the village.

"I know we've had our differences and i am sorry for the things i said and did." Sinead steps forward first and moves in for the dreaded goodbye hug. "I'm sorry too. Friends?" is the reply she receives. They hug.

"Keep in touch. I hope you get everything you wish for." Their hug seems to last a life time. She kisses him on the cheeks and walks away.

"Where ya going" again i ask another pointless question we both know she is giving me and Jase time alone to say goodbye. "This is the last time you two will be together, me and Tilly will be here tomorrow and the next day. You need to say goodbye properly. Don't waste any time" Jason now begins to cry "Thank you" he whispers to Sinead as Tilly goes for here goodbye.

"Come here" she pulls in for a massive hug. I can't look at him, the tears dribbling down his gorgeous face. "I'll keep an eye on Seth for you."

"YER" he softly reply's, arms still tight round Tills back.

She walks to Sinead and they go away together crying.

I have to turn and face him now, i still believe it is one of the hardest things ever to look at his face and pull back the urge to softly wipe away his tears with my sleeve and grab his small, heart shaped face and kiss him for always, never letting go. Even though i am with Sinead – i think she may have understood if that had really happened. And oh god, you will never know how much my heart ached for me to do that, but my brain said no and for that one time only i thought with my brain and not with my heart. So i turn and face him scratching my head, "so you really going then?" even though again i know his answer.

"This is the last time I'm gonna see ya?" my heart is literally about to jump out of my mouth, and can actually feel it crawling up my throat. I feel like i am about to throw up. But i don't. He doesn't reply he just stands there with a blank look over his face. I don't think i have ever loved Jason more than at this moment in time.

"It's harder than i thought" he sighs we've sat down now and are looking deeply into each others eyes.

"What is?" i know the answer to this as well, but i just have to hear him say it. i think to myself maybe just maybe if he says it out loud he won't leave and he will change his mind and stay with me forever. I think if he had done that we would have gotten together. (horrible for Sinead i know, having just got her back and taken her away from her boyfriend but still – no need to dwell on that since it never happened).

Here comes the answer. "Saying goodbye? Figuring out all that has happened?"

"It'll take me years to figure out what's happened" i say truthfully, it has been four years since i first met Jase or back then Jas and i still don't know what went on between us. Not properly anyways.

We stare at each other for what seems like years, but is really only seconds. "Hey, you'll slay those American lads" i say playfully punching his leg – trying to be all normal about this conservation and situation. But then i realise when has my situation with Jase ever been normal?

"Yer" was his answer.

"Yer" i say – almost back to 'normal' now. I move my hands down into my jean pockets. "It's not really goodbye, is it? i mean we can Skype and stuff. And once you've settled in over there, I'll come out and visit ya. And you'll visit back over here" i could have guessed what was coming next, i saw his expression change half way through what i was saying.

He breathes in. "I'm never coming back here" he says so surely.

"What ya talking about. Course you will." I say utterly confused by his statement.

"And you're not visiting me" he says shaking his head. My faces break and i nearly – but not quite – let a tear collapse down my face.

"Why not?" i mumble shaking my head now i am really confused.

"Because, i wanna start again. Somewhere where no one knows who or what i was before" i nod not actually comprehending what he is saying. "So this really is goodbye, i will never forget you Bart McQueen" _and with that he stands up and walks away, at the top of the stairs he turns around as a tear cascades down his face he swivels away from me once more. I breakdown and let the tears fall down my face as he walks into the misty distance i mouth I WILL NEVER FORGET YOU... JASMINE COSTELLO._

**Present day**

At least that time Jas left i had Sinead to comfort me this time nobody i have been utterly alone. Oddly i have grown closer to Callum maybe it was because of how his first love left him (well he was whisked away from her – but still) i remember the words i once to Jason: Love hurts, so much. But life is short and without love it's nothing. I also think i may have said: sometimes love is about holding on and sometimes it's about letting go, but in the words of Rose and Jack from Titanic: never let go. Never ever, ever let go they say if you love something you should set it free and if it/they love you they will return... eventually, so i let Jason go and she returned and now i will never give up hope as long as i shall live. I only wish i had made my time with Jas count more than it did. All the fighting and the arguing if I'd known... well i wouldn't have bothered with it so much.

I fall asleep again – i seem to be doing that a lot at the moment sleeping, i haven't changed my clothes in over a week and i have not had a shower in 2. Even at the beginning of this, i wasn't this bad. I kinda seemed like she was off on holiday or we had, had an argument or we were spending time with family...

**11 months previously **

**JAS HAS BEEN DEAD A MONTH HERE.**

Today is the day of Jasmine's 'funeral' we never found the body so we are burying some memories of her. Although we did pay for a plot so we could come and visit. Her headstone reads:

_Jasmine Costello_

_24__th__ of February 1995 – 24__th__ of February 2013_

_Aged 18_

_Beloved daughter, sister and girlfriend._

Me and Seth couldn't physically write anything else, it was too hard. In one respect we wanted to put something about Jason on there but we just couldn't. We have decided that she should be 'buried' her next to Heidi and Carl we thought it right.

We arrive at the church where people could put in their most sacred items to do with Jas in there. Seth, Anita, Mitzeee, Riley, Gem and I arrived together hand in hand to an overcrowded service area. That is when we realised how many lives Jas had touched, people we had completely forgotten about were there. Mark – Jason's best mate was there, Jasmine's posh school friends – Olivia and Ellie. So many others as well, then the entire room went quite and we six turned around slowly still holding hands for support. He was standing there clutching a photograph and a tatty little toy... Silas. We stepped forward towards him, he spoke first.

"I am so sorry, if only i had been there i could have stopped her, if only" he broke down in tears and sunk into a seat next to my leg. I knew what he had done but Jas was that one thing that made him... human – she made him have feelings of empathy and compassion, sorrow and pain, guilt and sadness. Without her Silas would have been unstoppable or in the words of Brendan Brady: bulletproof.

"I am sorry for your loss" i said to Silas, it wasn't fair to any of us to deny him access to his granddaughters funeral after all it is what she would have wanted.

"I am shocked you son are speaking to me after what i tried to do to your cousin" Silas mumbles quietly.

"Well i am first and foremost Jasmine's boyfriend and always will be – and this is definitely what she would have wanted. And i am not about to disapprove now" i inform him.

"I do thank you for this Bart – and i never had you down for the sort of lad that would respect a girl. So i am pleased"

"I am not some Psycho, i loved Jas and i still do and i would never do anything knowingly to hurt her or any girl for that matter!" i hiss in his ear and i turn and walk away. I walk towards the front and i slowly stumble up the steps and clear my throat.

"Ah hmm..." i wait for the noise to die down. Silence follows my throat clearing immediately. I begin my speech, tears are already filling up inside my eyes. I hold a piece of paper between my trembling fingers, it was completely blank – i had no idea what to write, to write something make it visible on paper, it meant that she was really gone and i could feel deep inside my heart she wasn't and that she was still out there somewhere. So instead i composed a playlist of her favourite songs.

Thank you for coming today everybody, i know this would mean a lot to Jas seeing how many lives she touched. I don't really know what else to say so i have composed a playlist instead.

After the playlist had stopped and everyone wiped their eyes many people came up to the front to leave all their special belongings of Jas that would be put into her grave plot. I hadn't known what to choose i didn't want to throw away any cherished memories i had of Jasmine or Jason where i could never see them again. I had made my choice the night before my collection consisted of the photograph of me, Jase and Sinead, a pencil Jason had given me in the middle of our GCSE maths exam (It had his name on it) and a postcard from Jas which she sent when she went away to 'America' it had been through Seth to get to me so as i would know year she was or nothing it simply said:

I will always be here Bart. Love you x

xx

I have now also written a postcard to put with it saying:

It is you Jasmine, and always will be x

They can stay together forever under the ground as a symbol of our never ending love for each other.

As we walked slowly to the grave i overheard Seth talking to Silas, i couldn't hear the whole conversation but it was something like: How could you do that and then turn up here? Do you not have any decency or respect? And then a reply along the lines of: i have to say goodbye, you only get one chance in life and i know i screwed that up but Jasmine was always different and i still have my rights you know.

We arrived at the grave side i felt Jem's hand slip inside mine as we threw our items one by one into the hole in the ground. Various items were thrown in including: a necklace, a belt, shoes, flowers, many photograph and a beautiful drawing of Seth and Jasmine together at the pier when they were 7, i frequently saw her copy on the desk in her room. We each chucked a handful of dirt over the items and turned away, i walked to the top of the hill in the graveyard and sat for an hour or so while they filled in the hole.

**Present day**

There is only one thing i can think of during the last year which i really regret. The day after Jasmine's funeral i was so depressed and distraught that i pick up my phone and dialled the only person i could think of.

**The day after Jasmine's funeral**

07767484339 was the number i tapped into my mobile it began to ring. It rung for ages and ages and as i was about to hang up she answered...

"Hello"

"Hi it's me" i sigh

"Bart?" she asks confused

"Of course who else calls you and says it's me?"

"Err. Nobody i guess, i just- you sound really depressed"

"Well let me think – why the fuck would i be feeling depressed, my life is just awesome and i am on top of the world at the moment. Oh no wait reverse that of course i am fucking depressed you thick whore my girlfriend died less than a month ago!" i was angry ok, she wasn't a whore, and she knew that, she actually dealt with what i said pretty well.

"Alright, alright calm down, please just calm down. Why did you call me exactly Bart?" now it isn't just her that is confused i am too.

"I don't know. I don't know" i wail into the phone "I needed to speak to someone and you were the only person i could think of, i mean i saw you at the funeral yesterday after everyone had gone. I was still there and i saw you, i am glad you went. After the party you two seemed to be off with one another – more than before i mean. What happened?"

"Well... i dunno if i really wanna tell you this considering what you have just been through and how you must be feeling, especially not over the phone. Why don't you come over later? Say 5?"

"Err" i am hesitant at this i mean it is Sinead after all.

"If you wanna know, come round and i will tell you, this is not something you want to hear over the phone Bart"

"Ok, fine i will be round in an hour" i cave in, it sounds serious what she wants to tell me about her, Jas and the party so i am going to go and find out, then i will leave. Simple.

_It wasn't that simple, i was naive to think things with Sinead would be._

I hung up the phone as soon as doing so i regretted the entire phone call, i mean what was i thinking Jas had been dead a month and i was already calling up the ex-girlfriend for comfort using the cliché line of "i didn't know you else to call" even though what i had told her was the truth, i didn't know who else to call. My mates didn't understand, Seth was in his own little world. And i had never been close to Mitzeee or Riley not after i sprayed _Mitzeee is fat _on the arch and messed with Jason's head saying i wanted to be with him and then changing my mind because he was brave and came to school as Jason – his 'true' self. Riley never properly forgave me. so Sinead was literally the only person, i tried to speak to Carmel – with her having gone through the same situation with Calvin a few years previously, but she refused to acknowledge me.

By the time i had finished thinking about it, i was already knocking on the O'Connor's door, Sinead opened the door and i was shocked she was in her Pyjamas, i had expected her to be in much less, maybe i do underestimate her.

"Hi, come on in, just to inform you we are alone Finn is out with some mates and mum is out shopping – so she will be back shortly."

Ok. I respond slightly baffled at why she is bothering me with the events of her family's day when we are just two friends hanging out. I flop onto the sofa and Sinead sits comfortably in the armchair just to the right of me.

"So what do you wanna talk about?" she asks fiddling with her nails, it is obvious she wants to avoid the fact she invited me round to tell me what went down between her and Jasmine.

You asked me round remember i remind her.

"Well i thought you may wanna talk about something else as well, seeing as you sounded so bad on the phone. I was right to oh my god, you are only wearing one sock and odd shoes, what is going on" she enquires moving from the arm chair to the sofa and sitting down on her legs with a pillow covering her stomach.

Well they were the only clean clothes i could find. And i wanted to make an effort. I say jokingly try bring a sense of humour into the conservation.

"Bart, seriously? I have seen you in way worse states of clothing. Do you remember the time when we ran away together and your yellow jumper had to last you for 3 weeks? You stunk so bad that it was the first thing Jase commented on, when he came to visit us!" she laughs, a proper full good heartily laugh, i haven't seen one of them in a while and they always make to smile.

Yer i do, i also remember you wasting money on a new top! So you didn't stink to bad, look after yourself why don't ya! i say also in full hysterics now. She places her hand on my shoulder.

"Bart, everything happens for a reason and everything always works out for the best. I thought i was gonna die when you and i spilt up (both times) and i know this isn't like that but i do want to understand and help you. You know that right?" she tells me now both her hands are on my shoulders and she is sitting up on her knees bent forward towards me slightly.

Yer i know you wanna help, and i think i could do with some help right now. I smile at her. She smiles back at me a lovely warm smile, and before i know it our lips are pressed up against each other and she is on top of me. i snap to my senses push her off of me and sit up straight my head in my hands, i rub my hands over my face in an attempt to wake myself up. I can't it is no use.

"I'm sorry Bart, i shouldn't have done that. it was wrong of me, but it just felt... so, so..." she says rubbing my shoulders for me.

Right? It just felt so, so right? I finish the sentence off for her. And the next thing i know is we are upstairs in her bedroom pulling each other's clothes off.

I wake up to the beeping sound of my phone, it is a text message i reach down and delve into my jean pocket. I retrieve my phone the message is from Auntie Myra, where am i? Is the question she wants an answer to. The only problem i have no idea, i recognise the place but my mind is a blank. I let the phone fall out of my hand as i throw the sheets back over my head.

Then it happens the door clicks, the coffee spills and the girl yelps in pain. And she speaks in that stupid accent of hers and i suddenly become conscious of where i am and what has happened.

"Shit" is the only thing i say grabbing my clothes and shoving them on, wondering why an earth i only have one sock and odd shoes. I push past Sinead and escape the O'Connor's house with Diane shouting at me. i keep on running until i don't know where i am, then i recognise the place. I have run to the shack, i barge through the door and fall on to the old, grotty sofa and let the tears escape my eyes and run down my face.

**Present day**

Sinead and i still haven't spoken about our encounter yet. I get up and walk towards the window, i draw back the curtains and look deep into the distance. I am sure i see someone in the far distance. Then i blink and they have gone, disappeared, vanished into thin air. I am almost certain that i saw a flicker of long blonde hair in amongst the grass and the trees, i must be seeing things and i move into the kitchen to get a drink, what i don't see as i turnaround is the figure re appearing. And walking away further from away into the trees.


	27. Because As You Know

**Guys this chapter maybe a little confusing, i mean i got totes confused while writing it, it is set in the present (i think) with little references to the past. Please feedback on any mistakes you think i may have made. xx**

**Chapter 27: Because As You Know**

**Maddie POV**

I found a toe nail in my-"

Don't even go there! I say... ok more like shout at some snotty nose brat. How did i end up like this? Two years ago i was a rich 6th form student who went skiing in every possible school holiday and i spent money like it was going out of fashion, now i am out of fashion. I work in some grotty fast food restaurant, it started out as an after school weekend job, to pay towards my car as mummy said i had to contribute towards it – so i could learn the value of money. Then it became my after school job and now since the end of year twelve it is my day job. I had to drop out of school as my family and i needed the cash, god now i now how George used to feel. Always hanging around us little rich kids, well now the tables have turned.

And why may you ask? Well i shall tell you...

It is all because of a certain boy. Well a few really. It all started with Bart he was my first love, and well his step-mum died and he moved away, then i dated Callum – i really thought he was it we were it and meant to be together forever and ever. But he was just like all men out there don't let his – i am cold, dark and mysterious (kinda hot vampire thing) facade fool you, he is a normal teenage boy. As soon as he got what he wanted he was on to the next.

Well basically i am now working in this fast food restaurant because daddy's company went bust and yer well you can kinda gather the rest... no more ski holidays or weekends in Chelsea no more Prada shoes and handbags nope just toe nail clippings and puke to mop up. Fun times.

Anyways back to the boys. After Bart broke my heart when he left, i swore to get revenge first upon his new girlfriend Sinead, that didn't quite work out so well so when he dumped her for Jasmine or Jason (whoever he/she is) we decided to team up and get seek our revenge together, because as you know if you can't beat them... join em! Then Jasmine died, and Sinead felt all sorry for Bart and all their love for each other came rushing back and after a night of ill-informed passion, Bart again wrecked Sinead's heart and she came running back to Madds – just the way i like it! Because as you know Maddie is always right! So i suppose i should tell you now before i delve deeper.

It was me who sent Bart the text pretending to be Myra. Daft cow left her phone in the SU bar (where i work) and i saw a chance and took it. I haven't told Sinead this. Then after that we sent Bart a mysterious birthday card, making it look kinda like Jas had sent it... without being too obvious. And i have proceeded until now to sit in the woods behind Jono's flat and watch Bart day in day out going about his 'business'. I have been on this 'mission' for the past two months and today was the first time he noticed me, well i think he noticed me. i may have ducked out the way just in time. I pick up my phone, bag and keys and make my way to Sinead's.

**Calling... Sinead**

**Alright babe? Yer i am good too. **

**I am on my way over, we need to talk about the plan. **

**We need to step it up a gear**

**Oh that is a good idea, talk about it when i get there babes.**

**Totes, totes mwah love you babe **

And i begin to make the long trek to Sinead's house.

**Sinead POV**

I gave Madds the idea, let's get that clear now.

And even though i haven't spoken to Bart since our little encounter the day after Jas's funeral (over a year now) it does not mean that i haven't been keeping tabs on him!

Maddie turned up to my house about half an hour later looking windswept to say the least. I kiss her on the cheek as she walks in the front door. Shaking from the cold, it may be may but it feels more like December.

Hi babes

"Hey, it is so cold outside"

Yer, i can see that from your face! Come on in, i will help you get warmed up. I say flouncing off to the kitchen to make hot chocolate, when does that never work on a cold day? I bring the drinks over minutes later.

"Thanks" she says as she grasps the mug with both hands and taking a long gulp of the chocolaty substance. "So, you wanted to...?" gesturing me to repeat what i had previously said on the phone.

"Yer, like i said before i wanna call him up and like just say hardly anything until he says her name and yer that's it." i stop finished with the idea.

"Oh so kinda like..." Maddie imitates Bart's voice and mine in a mock conversation.

"Bart" she says quietly and very slowly her voice is almost silent – i can barely hear her.

"Yes, Hello, who is speaking please?" she makes out Bart to be all cocky and confident – just like he would try to be.

... nothing she stays silent for 'Jasmine' next words.

"Jas? Is that you? Jasmine please speak to me?" she says speaking really fast. Pretending to be really anxious and worried – i laugh so much she gets Bart so well – that is exactly what he would be like all manly and confident to begin with and as soon as he thinks it is Jas he becomes all soft and soppy.

Oh My God that is totes ridic Madds, he is gonna totes fall for this, maybe you should call up?

"Nah babe, you! You haven't spoken to the guy in like a year plus you can do Jas's voice better than i can!"

Too true too true, pass us the phone. She hands me the phone, i tap in Jono's home number Bart will be the only one in and he will know if i call him on his mobile.

**Calling... Jono Home **

**Hello? **_He answers straight away Oh My God, Oh My God, Oh My God, i can't do this i love the guy. He may not feel the same but i still love him. NO Sinead man up, you are gonna do this._

**Bart?** _My voice goes all high and squeaky not like Jas at all, i compose myself and start again._

**Bart? **_My voice is now deep and husky like Jasmine's and very believable too._

**Yup, speaking, who wants to know? **_I stay silent and ridged stiff on the stop where i am standing in the kitchen – i feel like if i move i will cave and confess all, but i don't want to this guy ruined my life. And i can't get over him, him with his light brown, hazily coloured eyes, his impeccable body and his soft lips touching mine. I snap out of my trance he is speaking again, right in my ear, his voice makes me wobble at the knees and my insides turn to mush. Then i realise he doesn't know it is me he thinks it is her._

**Jas? Is that you? Please Jas! Talk to me! I love you. **_I have to hang up, before i do something i will regret, like telling him what Maddie and i have been doing. Oh My God, what have we been doing? We need to stop we are just gonna ruin the poor guys life, i mean his girlfriend is dead murdered even and we are making him think she is still alive how sick is that? how twisted am i? _

Maddie, this is over i can't do this anymore. I'm out. And by the time i get back i want you to be gone as well!

"But Sinead where will i go? I having been staying here for months now! Where do you expect me to live?"

I don't know. And i don't care Because you know... i only care about my friends. I say storming out of the house.


	28. Pretty Little Liar

**Please please please review my story it would mean so much pleaseeeee xx thanks xx**

**Chapter 28: Pretty Little Liar**

**Bart's POV **

It had never occurred to me that our lives that had been so personally interwoven could disentangle with such haste. If i had known perhaps i would have kept a tighter grasp on them and not let concealed tides draw us away from each other.

My name is Bart McQueen and i am 19 years old, it has been over a year since i lost her, Jasmine Costello. The love of my pathetic excuse for a life. When she was alive i had made her miserable, always coping off with Sinead when she wanted to be Jason, my love for Sinead despite what i may have previously stated was never real, and never would be. I regret all the times i got close to her. Especially the time after Jas's funeral. I was in a vulnerable place and didn't know what i was thinking or doing. I am not trying to blame it all on Sinead, because i obviously had some part in it but i think it was largely down to her as she knew how broken and fragile i was. What i am trying to say is that in some ways i think she may have taken advantage of me. And i know that there is nothing what so ever i can do about it now as it was like such a long time ago, but i just wanna let you know that i regretted every minute of it. I placed the photo frame back on the mantel piece, centre because Jas was the centre of my world and everything revolved around her.

I do this nearly every day, sitting and staring at a photo of Jas, a different one each time – sometimes even the few i have of Jason. How pathetic is that? Just another pathetic thing i do, to add to the pathetic list of pathetic things i do in my sad and pathetic life.

It should have been me, i mean i should have been there to protect her or at least get her out before she was engulfed by the flames and torn apart from me forever. What is the point answer me that? i shout throwing a photo at the wall, i smashes, into tiny pieces and falls onto the floor. As i sink into the sofa with a bottle. I lie back on the sofa and the bottle drops from my hand just as the doorbell begins to buzz repeatedly.

**Sinead's POV **

It wasn't how i the first time i saw him was supposed to go, after i left the house i walked around the village for a while, and then i went back home but i could see (through the window) that Maddie was still there – i could hear her as well. She had all the house lights on the TV and IPod blaring out and a drink in one hand pizza in the other dancing around the living room, taking full advantage of them empty house. I had a good mind to go in there and pack her stuff for her, but i knew Maddie and i knew that if i stayed away long enough she would realise i was serious and just leave and i would probably never have to see her again.

So i turned away and began to walk through the village again; i sat at the fountain for a while it was 11 and a Saturday so people were out and partying. I saw Barney and Rob walking together hand in hand: i had always thought that Barney was gay but not Rob he was so... yer anyways people i didn't recognise also walked past the village had drastically changed since Jas died. People came and went like this was a holiday town. They stayed a month then left. I made my way through the crowded streets and started my journey to Jono's.

**After about 20 minutes...**

I arrived at Jono and Ruby's flat – i can't believe they lasted this long i mean none of the rest of us lasted anywhere near that even Bart and i – though i can clearly see now he doesn't love me like that and he never has as much as i want him too, he just doesn't feel that way about me, but that doesn't mean i can't help him. He is still my friend after all even if i haven't spoken to him in over a year.

I remember him telling me those many moons ago about Jas and the fire, he spoke very fast and i couldn't really hear him very well but i think he said something like: "There has been a fire at the dog, they didn't find anyone" he had seemed happy, but also so sad at the prospect that her body was never found in all the rubble. The pub was recently reopened by Darren and Neil, god that boy! What a doofus.

I began to knock on the door and i thought i heard footsteps so i banged loud and louder for like an hour. I knew Bart was in there and i hadn't ever once said it was me. I started to feel really anxious and worried, i had a feeling something was wrong. I had to find a way to get in there! I walked round the back i noticed the open window, it was just open wide enough to squeeze through. I made my way up the side of the flat praying nobody would see me and call the police thinking i was a burglar. Why did Jono and ruby have to live in a flat and not a bungalow? I thought to myself as i scaled the wall like Spiderman – woman – whatever, i edge the sticky window open slightly more than it was already and lifted my legs through then my body, lastly my arms closing the window slowly behind me. I wandered round the flat, i had no idea where i was having never actually been inside, and no matter how many times Ruby asked me to pop over for chat. I was standing in the middle of Bart's bedroom, it was raining outside so i found some of Bart's old clothes to shove on as i looked around the rest of his room. All the photos of Jas and me too – i was really surprised at that, i made my way through to the lounge Jono had certainly done alright for himself having a three bedroom flat in the village.

BARRRT i scream as i run towards him, falling with a thump onto the wooden floor next to him, i grab hold of his hand and tap his face gently repeating over and over again "Bart? Wake up Bart".

**Bart POV**

I heard Jason crying out my name, i had just been stabbed by Fern after i came back to protect him from Fern, she had a knife and well she plunged it into the right hand side of my stomach. Jason ran towards me and held me in his arms as i drifted into unconsciousness. I still recall his voice speaking to me though, at least i think he was actually saying these things we never properly spoke about it to be honest. He said:

"They're gonna be here any minute, just staying awake yer..." then he asked me...

"Why did you come back for me? You should never have come back!" afterwards he told me...

"I never meant to hurt you, you were never meant to get hurt. I'm so sorry" then he breathed the words...

"I love you" so quietly to me so that i could only just barely hear them, but i did. And then he kissed my mouth and his warm tears fell onto my face and he only let go once Malachy and Mercedes came running over, i sometimes wish they had never turned up and we could have stayed kissing forever, but then i may be dead now and me and Jas wouldn't have had anywhere near as much time together and i wouldn't want her to have gone through what i have.

Then i heard my name again, someone was shouting it at me and shaking me, but it wasn't Jason.

"Bart? Wake up, you gotta wake up. Come Bart just fucking wake up! You bastard, wake up.

It was a girl's voice and i recognised it as Sinead's. And that is when i snapped out of the dream about Jason and woke up in reality.

**Sinead POV**

He woke up just as the ambulance arrived and Jono walked in the door. He chucked his phone and keys on the table.

"What the fuck Sinead? What have you done to him?" he bellows in my face.

I wipe away his spit from my eye and shout back.

Nothing, i ain't done nothing i found him like this 20 minutes ago!

I rode with him in the ambulance and sat by his bed side waiting for him to wake up. It definitely wasn't how i expected to next see him, but still i had to tell him what i was gonna tell him over a year ago, i couldn't keep it from him any longer. As soon as he woke up i would tell him what happened between me and Jasmine at the party, which is where everything started to go wrong.

**Bart POV**

Sinead was sitting in a chair to my left read a magazine when i woke up, i had drunk way too much the other night to forget all my problems and it hadn't done me much good. Had it?

"Hi, Bart. How you feeling?" she seemed genuinely concerned.

"I have a splitting headache" i tell her rubbing my forehead while speaking.

"Well, i am not surprised" she laughed "Seeing how many bottles you drunk last night! Jono was here but he left to see Ruby, he'll be back later though he promised" she smiled holding my hand like i was a little child.

"There is actually something i need to talk to you about, and i know it may be hard for you but this conversation is well over due, it is about Jasmine. In fact it was what i was gonna tell you last year before we 'hooked up'" she rests her head on her hands beside my arms, awaiting my reply.

I take a deep breath... Ok i am listening, what do you want to tell me?

"Well, i don't really know how to begin this Bart"

Well neither do i, as i don't know what it is about but you know take your time, get it just right. I say sarcastically.

"Ok, fine just promise you won't go over the top or get angry etc"

Why would i...?

"Just promise ok?"

Ok, i promise. Now tell me what it is.

"Right well you two were fighting and i told her that she was the love of your life and that you would do anything for her. Then i gave her a quick kiss and a hug as she was gonna go get you back. And i then proceeded to drag her to the door to go tell you how she felt, but she hung back. I can see now she didn't wanna go into the crowds, they weren't her thing...but... at the time i took it the wrong way and moved in to kiss her and i did like properly like i used to kiss you!"

What the fuck were you thinking Sinead you are not gay and weren't you with Jono?

"Yer but you know better than most the affect she has on people. I mean she turned you gay, even if you wouldn't admit it. if she had fully become Jason you would have still loved her right and wanted to be with no?"

Yes, i suppose i did love her as a dude.

"Well it was the same for me the way she made me feel, i had never felt it before and i had to let her know how i felt. I thought she is such a brave, kind, and thoughtful person. That was why i was so mean about her. Because i loved her and she only wanted you!"

So... are you gay?

"I dunno, i haven't felt it since Jas or nothing i dunno if it was just her or i didn't even feel that way about you Bart. I just don't know i am so confused Bart, especially know she's gone, i just don't know. But what about you, i kissed your girlfriend... and you're not bothered?"

Not really... well we were on a sort of break, she didn't feel the same way, and it was years ago, and she is...

"DEAD" she finished the sentence for me. I still don't wanna accept the fact she is dead.

She moved in towards me for a hug, and she kissed me lightly on the cheek. I think we are finally over the feelings we had for each other, since we are both on the same page.

"Bye Bart, i am gonna go now, i have said my piece and am now gonna leave you in peace. See ya around"

Bye Sinead, i give her a small smile and wave as she leaves Jono and Ruby enter carrying grapes, balloons, flowers and a pile of cards. I lift the top one off the pile...

Bart

Get well soon

J x

I kick back the bed sheets and run after Sinead. I catch up with her in the hospital reception. Sinead, i pant very out of breath, i haven't been working out as much since Jas.

"Yes Bart, when i said see ya around i meant around the village like later in the week not five seconds later" she joked.

It isn't that look! I say producing the card and showing it to her. She is still alive look i knew it i have been getting cards, notes and phone calls for months now.

"Bart it isn't what you think" she is shaking her head at me.

What do you mean? My face begins to crumple.

"I am so sorry Bart; it was Maddie's idea after you slept with me and then ran out. She decided to get you back by calling you, giving you fake cards and watching you, she has been doing it for months, since before we had sex, she thinks i don't know but i found the text, the other day one her phone and i recognised the date, she text you from Myra's phone to make you realise what you had done that morning Bart. I am so sorry but i wanna help you... please i didn't mean for you to get hurt... i don't know what i was thinking, i realised we went too far and said no more, but it is obvious she is carrying on"

What? I cry. Sinead how could you do this, you know what Jas means to me, how could you make me think she was alive when ... when... you loved her too how you feel if i had done this to you, if you were her girlfriend? How could you, you bitch! I spit at her, i walk away back to my room.

How could she do this? I understand Maddie; she has always been a conniving, devious, manipulative little bitch. It is why i ended it with her, but Sinead? I never had her pegged as a pretty little liar. Then again she has been really honest today, but i... what if it is a trap all cooked up between the two of them. No i can't be, i can trust Sinead. Can't i?


	29. Innocent Until Proven Gulity

_**To purple and pink. Thanks for the review it means a lot. And i actually like writing them in different POV but anyways, and i can't write in 3**__**rd**__** person very easily and as for the flashbacks, the whole chapter of flashbacks was a lot but otherwise there has only been a few and they actually work with the writing and it is written word for word and everything about each flashback is perfect but there won't be any for a while as i have run out of amazing flashbacks of Bart and Jason that work with my fic. And as for Jason, i think he deserves being happy with himself and i ain't gonna copy other people's ideas, also as for Jason reverting back to Jasmine loads what does it matter each story is different in the way it is written and in its storyline. And if people don't like my fic, it may sound rude but i actually don't really care it is just me getting stuff i would have like to have happened in the show across to other fans, well it was like that at the beginning not really any more as i don't want Jase to die. And i don't like people having a go either if your gonna have a go at least get the facts and spelling right first! Lol xx check out my other fic it is co written with girlwednesday. **_

**Please review please review please review **

**Chapter twenty nine: Innocent Until Proven Guilty **

**Bart POV**

What do you think can i trust her? I ask Noodles, ruby's dog while rubbing his ears and face and repeating the cliché phrase of who's a good boy. I speak to Noodles in a patronising voice so much so, if he was a person he would be swearing at me by now.

No, you're right, people do deserve a second chance, yes they do. Yes they do. Again in that really annoying voice you only use when "talking to a dog"

I have decided to trust what Sinead tells me as true give her the benefit of the doubt because i know better than most everyone is innocent until proven guilty.

**Meanwhile across the village... Fern POV**

Sinead, hey Sinead isn't it wait up for a second.

"What?" she snaps at me. she seems really angry and i don't really know the girl.

"What do ya want bitch, Bart and Jase told me all about you, you fucked up bitch. And then you go do that to Jasmine, the sweetest, kindest and bravest person ever? How could you?"

You would understand, and why should i explain to you i don't know you. All i wanted to ask you was if ya wanted to come to a party tonight.

"Yer, i could do with a party and your right i probably wouldn't understand. But you should explain to me because i was a very good friend of Jas and Bart's"

Oh, a very good friend? Fine i will tell you, i did it cus i loved her, more than anyone else. Do you know what that feels like loving someone so much but them not feeling the same way? Probably not ya get everything ya want don't ya?

"No actually i do get it, i loved Bart like that but he loved Jas and i loved Jas like that but she loved Bart, they only saw me as a friend and that killed me inside but that doesn't mean that i wanna kill them!"

Oh, i didn't know you were a lesbian too? Well that is not the biggest surprise ever but it is up there. Maybe we could go out some time? I say biting my lip and picking the nail varnish off my fingers.

"I dunno Fern, i dunno if i am a lesbian or not i have only ever felt that way about Jas. But having said that ... yer ok why not it is just a date."

Ok, cool, meet you at the bus stop in half an hour. I say running off. I turn around half skipping i am that happy. Bring your bikini! And i leave her wondering with a devilish smile i turn and skip away.

**28 minutes later... (Btw it is like 10 in the morning here)**

**Sinead POV**

Alright Jono, Neil looking good today! I smile and nod i do it all the time to make him happy i don't actually believe it (all the time).

"Looking good yourself Sinead where ya off to with the bikini on and can i come?" he says peering down my shirt, ok it was unbuttoned most of the way down but still.

Oi, i say pushing his head back up towards my face. I am going to the beach and no you can't come! Ha ha, i laugh at him jokingly sticking my tongue out and flouncing off over to the bus stop watching them as they walk into price slice pretending they are buying food but "secretly" watching me, Jono and Neil are so predictable.

"Hey" fern waves at me i smile and tell her we are being watched she agrees to pretend we aren't together and when a fit guy walks past i chase after him. thankfully Jono and Neil wander off not interested anymore, i make up some story about my ex stalking me to the guy and return to join my date.

We climb on the bus and ride it all the way to the sea. We climb off the bus 20 minutes later and the chilly spring air hits us in straight in the face, Fern grabs my hand and pulls me towards the ice cream stand.

No, i protest. It is way too cold for ice cream today Fern!

"How, Sinead can you come to the beach and not have ice cream? Answer me that!"

Fine, i give in as long as you pay. I say to her.

"Deal" she says practically sprinting towards the ice cream stand, at least there is no queue we order two posh toffee double scoop ice cream cones and lick them fast and within 5 minutes there is nothing left.

We go on the big wheel and the rollercoaster 3 times and go swimming in the sea. I walk out of the sea running my fingers through my hair. The last time i went in the sea i never walked out again. I woke up in hospital with Bart by my side before everything got ruined that summer was when things changed for worse.

We grab some chips for tea and head off for a wander around the seaside shops, i love the seaside it has everything: the smell, the food, the views. I love it here. I emerge from the shop with 6 bags, fern with 1 she does nowhere near as much shopping as me we don't actually have anything in common but despite what she has done i enjoy spending time with her she seems quite a nice person underneath.

We walk down the pebbly beach, i slip but Fern turns and catches me and my shopping. I stand there staring into her eyes, her beautiful brown eyes, i drop the shopping bags and grab her faded denim jacket pulling her towards me bringing our lips together. We break away after what seems like hours the other people on the beach are staring at us and a guy tells us to go as he doesn't want his young daughter seeing our 'disgraceful and inappropriate' behaviour, what a jerk. We run to catch the bus back to hollyoaks and continue to kiss for the entire journey home, nobody on the bus seems to care and as we depart the bus we have a last long slow lingering kiss at the bus stop. Then we go our separate ways.

"I had fun today Sinead" i hear Fern call out to me i turn around. I had fun to; it was lovely and very unexpected, bye. I wave bye, i just realised i waved bye like a lunatic but i don't care. I was too happy to give a flying monkey about what anyone thought of me especially not Jono or Neil who were sitting by the fountain watching me intently.

**Fern POV**

I knew i could get her to fall for me, i told you didn't i? She once loved Jasmine or Jason and now she loves me, who knew i could have something that was good enough for Jasmine Costello. I will use and abuse her like i did with you and there is nothing you or anyone else can do to stop it!


	30. You Only Get One Chance

**Please review - it means a lot to know what u think xxx**

**Chapter thirty: You Only Get One Chance**

**Bart POV**

"Oh Bart, I like this girl I really do she is so nice and kind and just everything I ever wanted from someone in life, granted I did think that person would be a man but I can't help who I fall in love with. Can i?"

Love? You have only been on one date how can you love her already?

"You loved Jas after you met her a the beauty salon for 10 minutes when she waxed your leg" Sinead laughed at me.

Yer and look at how we ended up. I shout at her gesturing around the apartment. Sinead I live on my mates girlfriend's couch and I have no job, no money and no qualifications. I am miserable Sinead, anyway less about me more about you. How is this girl, when do I get to meet her?

"AND HOW FAR HAVE YOU GONE WITH HER?" Jono pops his head around the door. "Could you not have found a lesbian sex partner when we were together? We could have had so much fun the three of us"

"What about me? You can't leave me out mate" Neil shouts from the bedroom. He and Jono have been locked in there since yesterday playing Xbox and play station. Neil has the best job ever he tests out new computer games to see if they are market worthy and he is married to the fittest girl ever, she is an underwear model and is way out of his league, but still if they are happy then that is all that matters.

"Oi, calm down boys. You don't get to be involved with my sex life anymore Jono and I am sorry Neil that means you won't be either as Jono won't have any information to relay on to you! Oh and if you must know I kissed her that is all"

Tongues? I say joining in, I know it is wrong but it feels like old times and I can't resist a small chance to live in the past when everything was good.

"Hey! Don't you start!" she thumps my shoulder hard and leaves the flat, she knows me well enough to know that I will follow after her in a bid to get more juicy info on her girl on girl experience.

we walk around town for a while in silence after I catch up to her, she seems to be building up to say something big. I consider turning and running as far away from her as possible at this point. Sinead and something big are to things that should never ever go together. She stops me by reaching up and planting her hands on my shoulders then she runs her hands down to my hands reaches out and grabs them pulling them closer towards her chest.

"Bart" She sounds scared, worried and anxious. "You know I love you and I would never do anything to purposely hurt you right?"

Yer of course I do, why do you ask? I am starting to get worried now, my voice trembling as I speak to her.

"It's Fern"

What's Fern? I say my voice rising in anger just at the name, nostrils begin to flare, deep breathing to calm myself down starts and the rubbing of neck too.

"I am in love with Fern, and I know how you feel about her and if you don't wanna be friends anymore I would completely understand" she begins to cry. So I suppress to feelings of anger and become her friend again.

Come here! I say pulling her into my chest and wrapping my arms around her for a big hug, I don't know what it is about them, but hugs always make you feel better no matter what has happened. Look Sinead I hate Fern after what she has done to me, but you are one of my bestest and oldest friends and I promise you that will never change, it is up to you who you date not me. Though if I were you I would have a serious think about whether you can trust her or not, after what she did to the love of your life.

"I know what she did to you was awful but I really think I love her so much"

I didn't mean me Sinead. I know you are trying to put it to the back of your mind, but I can see it in your eyes. Deep down your wondering what if I stop loving her and don't want to be with her anymore. What will she do to me? Sinead the possibilities are endless, she has killed before and I can't think of anything worse she could do to you. You're a strong girl and can get through things, surely you can get over your feelings for her and see sense?

"I know, I have thought about it so many times myself" she licks her lips and swallows as the tears fall down her cheeks. "But don't you think she deserves a second chance?" she looks deep into my eyes searching for an answer.

I shake my head, No Sinead sorry she has had too many chances in her life, you only get one life use it well. She took a life from someone and didn't get punished that was her second chance. And what about Jas think about her, she won't ever get a second chance will she, she won't ever come back to me will she!

"I know your right, but I love her, how am I supposed to let that go! Please Bart help me"

I will, I will help you. I am wondering though what she wants with you, because I am sure she didn't know you were a lesbian, you didn't even know! So what does she want with you. She must be planning something. Something big!

"Well then, if you think she is planning something maybe we could use my feelings for her to manipulate her and find out what."

Ok but what is in it for you?

"I get to spend time with the woman I love and prove to you she isn't a psycho killer like people including you think she is"

Sounds fair. Meet at mine tomorrow when Jono and Ruby are at work to discuss?

"Sure, cya then"

Bye I say giving her a hug. "Bye Bart" she says hugging me back, I miss getting a hug off someone.

**Fern POV**

Look nobody knows about you hunny and I have gotten away with this for years, and I have done it to countless women, you're not the first and you certainly won't be the last.

"You won't get away with this for much longer Fern, my boyfriend will come for me. People will come looking eventually" the voice tells me, but she is wrong nobody has been to the shack for years, and she won't be around for much longer to complain anyways, I love her so very much, but I will have to do her in sometime we can't go on like this because someone will come looking one day, and they will find us dead together like Romeo and Juliet. Her being Romeo me being Juliet.


	31. Us Against The World

**soz for taking a while to update, i have no excuse really, except skiing and school work. hope you enjoy and please review it would be really nice. thanks xx **

**Chapter thirty one: Us Against The World**

**Sinead POV**

9:15 am on a Tuesday morning, it was relatively warm for Liverpool, with a soft breeze blowing through the trees, making like a kind of whistling sound. It may sound like a perfect morning but it had been anything but i was on my way to Jono's to see Bart, like he had suggested yesterday, and i walking through the park minding my own business when i was bombarded by all these people running, i don't know why and quite frankly i wasn't that concerned. I was more concerned with the fact that i looked a complete and utter mess, i was lying flat out on the floor after being completely trampled on by like 20 people and my new top was completely torn to shreds. And that was just the beginning of a terrible day.

I stood up a slowly began to hobble out of the park and on to the street where Bart lived when some guy ran past me knocking me flying and nicking my bag as well. It was safe to say by the time i reached Bart's place i was extremely tired and pissed off. I mean i was in floods tears, with blood trickling down the side of my face and arms. I had a right to be like that. Bart buzzed me up without a word, but from the massive sigh i heard through the intercom i can presume i had probably woke him up and he would be in a foul mood. Great. Just my luck.

As i reach the door, Bart opens it up with a tired look on his face, which turns to horror as he sees me.

"Oh my god, Sinead! What in god's name happened to you?" he said as he ushered me inside the flat sitting me on the sofa and pouring me a glass of water. I take it hands shaking as i proceed to explain my terrible journey to him.

"Well, that's... that's just awful Sinead, bet you wished we had met at your place now"

Yer, they may have made my morning better and less eventful. Sorry to be a pain but do you mind if i get cleaned up? I say walking towards the bathroom.

"No no, sure go ahead, i will find you something to wear" Bart replies walking towards Ruby's clothes room. I whole room for her clothes! That girl don't know how lucky she is. Err, Bart. I say stopping him just before he enters.

"Yes?" he questions me.

Maybe i should borrow something of yours, she'll go mental if you mess up her system.

"Right yer, maybe you should. I will go find you something" he laughs and turns around "I'll get you a towel too"

I emerge from the steamed up bathroom 20 minutes later with a towel wrapped round me and another one over my hair. "The clothes are on the bed" he shouts to me, as i walk past. I am sure i saw him looking me up and down as i walked away.

I take a seat next to Bart on the sofa; he switches off the telly and turns to face me. "Are you sure your alright?" he says wiping new blood away from my head.

Yer course, it will stop soon. I say holding a tissue to it. The real question is what to do about Fern. Because the more i think about it the more i think your right, why should i trust her of all people? And then i come up with more theories as to why she is back again. And i come to the same conclusion each time, it must have something to do with Jasmine. I am yet to discover what but i just have that feeling you know?

"I have the same feeling" he sighs deeply "It is good to know i ain't the only one. And i couldn't tell anybody cus they would just think i was crazy. I just know what they would be thinking: there goes that crazy bastard again the one who thinks his dead girlfriend is still alive and out the somewhere. But he mental cus if she was, why hasn't she got in touch"

I have an answer to that, she can't get in touch with you or me or anybody because she isn't only someone is keeping her from making contact. It is like those movies you know where the undercover cop gets kidnapped and then his or her colleagues have to track em down. That is what we have to do Bart track her down. And the only way that is gunna happen is if i pretend like nothing is wrong and continue to go out with Fern, because we both know she has to have something to do with it.

I move closer towards him and place my hands on his shoulders. I know it is dangerous, but we have to find out what happened to our friend, it has been over a year. We can see something is wrong but nobody else can and it is because Fern is so good at hiding evidence she evaded prison once who's to say it won't happen again. I start to physically shake him. It is up to you and me now Bart. It is us against the world, you and me against them all. Bart are you listening to me? I slap him lightly on the cheek.

"Yes, yes of course i am listening there was no need for that, i was just thinking." And your finale thoughts are? "I think you should stop quoting Westlife" he laughs. Bart be serious now, this is gunna get messy and we may uncover things we don't like. But we will have to deal with that if we wanna find Jasmine. You wanna find Jas don't you? I say shaking him harder this time.

"Yes of course i do what kind of question is that?"

Alright, sorry calm down i just wanted to make sure. So it is you and me know right? We tell no one about this, now i want you to get your stuff and come and live with me so there is no chance of others finding out.

"I understand" he nods "But don't you live with your mum and Finn? We won't have any privacy there?"

Well, i have been wanting to get my own place for a while. And now i have a reason to don't i? See you at mine tomorrow morning 8 am sharp! Ok?

"Urgh, why did i agree to this. That is so early!" he groans. I laugh, i stand up and make my way to the door. We will find her you know Bart, have a little faith.

"I'm all out of faith, Sinead you're a little late. I have nothing left if we don't find her ... so i ain't pinning all my hopes on it. It is how i feel."

Ok dude we should really stop quoting songs now don't ya think. I say as i close the door carefully behind me.


	32. PLAN B, Wales and Nandos

**Chapter thirty two: PLAN B, Wales and Nando's**

**Bart POV**

I haven't told Jono i am leaving yet and it is like 7am and i am just about to leave and load my crap into the car, i don't think i can tell him. He will ask far too many questions with answers i am forbidden to discuss with him. And he is my best bud, he knows when i am lying. He will be happy i have gone it will give him more alone time with Ruby in the evenings.

I arrive at Sinead's in my battered up old car, never been properly fixed since the 2012 Technoville incident, i never had the money. Sinead dumps her stuff in the back seat – there isn't a lot which is strange considering this is Sinead but i am too tired to question it and i just drive, with Sinead directing me oh turn here and second left at the roundabout. It is safe to assume that it was a long drive and i was way more tired by the time i got out the car than when i got inside it. having had my rant about Sinead and all her faults she had picked a nice place, quiet, secluded, no one around to bother us and it was cheap too.

As i lugged our stuff up the stairs while Sinead tried to find the room, she stopped dead in front of a door.

"Number 17, oh and Bart the reason this place was cheap – it is only one bedroom"

Oh, i suppose i will be on the sofa then?

"Sofa? There is no sofa, i replaced that with a desk and computer this place is strictly work. We won't be getting much sleep anyway you want to find her as soon as possible right? And it has been over a year? So i should think we don't have much time."

Sound like the proper little detective don't we. I say smiling and my nose twitches a little. Right well we better get cracking then, no time like the present let's get unpacked and begin shall we. I smile again shoving a bag into her arms and pushing past her, she looks a tad confused at my response.

I dump my stuff in the "bedroom" and begin to pin up, lay out and file away all the data and evidence i have collected so far Sinead does the same over the other side of the room. The "living room" is set up like and office, the place is open planned and so we commandeered the "dining area" as extra office space. The kitchen and bathroom were the only places that stayed as they were the bedroom became a storage room, full of our clothes and extra filing systems not to mention the slightly visible bed.

I have collected a lot of articles and things over the year that Jas has been missing and by the looks of things Sinead has done too, she is really intent on finding Jasmine and has set up another "date" with Fern tomorrow, she says we have to be careful that Fern doesn't find out what we are up to and we won't have long until she figures something out as she is a sly, manipulative bitch. Sinead's words not mine, mine would have been a little stronger.

After a few coffee fuelled days i came across something interesting.

Sinead come look at this. I called out to her. I am kneeling on the floor of the kitchen with a full scale drawn map of the pub (my "art" skills finally coming in handy). She squats down next to me holding down the top right hand corner of the map.

Now i am thinking that, Fern wasn't planning on Jasmine refusing whatever Fern's meeting was about and that torching the place was a plan B.

"I think you could be right, with that theory, Fern loved Jas right and wanted to be with her even when she was a boy right? Well with Jas now being fully comfortable being a girl, Fern is gonna want her even more. It is my theory that Jas knocks back Fern's advances and in a last desperate attempt Fern decides if Jasmine won't come with her she doesn't deserve to live or more specifically be with anyone (namely you) so she sets the pub alight."

Yes, but that doesn't explain why there is no body of Jasmine and how Fern escaped, she wouldn't have had time i came running along with Seth within minutes of it starting and called the fire brigade. One of us would have seen her Seth was round the back exit looking for Jas and i was at the front. How do you suppose she escaped? I gesture at the map waving my arms frantically around the place.

There, Sinead's beautifully polished finger lands on the map. "That was her way out and i am betting you any money this wasn't the first time she has done this and if by some miracle i am wrong then she must have been planning this for a heck of a long time"

What about both?

"Huh, i don't understand what do you mean?"

I mean she was planning it for ages because she has done it before, come look. I walk through the piles of scattered papers to the computer. I Google searched Fern Warrington and this article came up, but i didn't make the connection until now. I am so stupid! How could i be that thick?

"Let me see, come on scoot over fatty" she begins to read the article intently, and then she sees it. "I get it, i get it. So you think this Fern Moore is our Fern Warrington?"

YES, don't you see it all make sense, see this part read it. i say pointing to the screen.

"Fourteen year old Fern Moore is the only survivor of a house fire, in which her best friend Millie Warrington died of stab wounds and smoke inhalation. Fern hide in the family's basement until police investigating the scene found a trap door which lead down to the cramped room in which Fern lay unconscious"

"Well it would make sense, but moving from best friend to lover?"

Think about it they say best friends if she had died? Or if she was older? And maybe she has escalated. It could have been an accident but she feels responsible. I don't know it is just a workable theory. You need to find out more about her, take her out for lunch and find out about her tell her about you as well but not too much.

**Sinead POV**

I set a date with Fern, we are going to lunch to today – Nando's. Bart are you listening? Whose there with you? I can hear laughing. Fine whatever i should be back by three.

Alright babe? I say as i kiss her on the cheek and embrace her into a hug. It makes me sick and my stomach is full of butterflies at the possibility that she is a murdering psychopath perhaps holding the girl i love hostage. But if i ever want to find her again i must act normal and not go over the top. She kisses me back and we walk into the restaurant and sit down in the only available table in the whole place.

We went up and order then i began the interrogation sorry conversation.

Babe, we've been on like countless dates now, and i dunno where we stand. What is going on with us?

"Well, i thought. Well i have been telling people your my girlfriend but i... is that alright with you?"

I breathe a pretend sigh of relief. That's great babe, that's what i thought but we didn't make it official and i was just totes confused by the whole fucking thing. But for us being a couple we don't know much about one another do we? But i think we can skip the first "date" rules, considering we are a bit further along in the dating spectrum.

"Well Hun, what ya wanna know about me? cus i know a fair bit about you."

You don't know the half of it. But since you mention it where did you live before you came here?

"Erm... well i moved from Wales when i was fourteen because my parents didn't think it would help me to grow up after people i loved had moved on, our town was small and she thought it would be better if i grew up somewhere busier and a little bit realistic. In hindsight she should have picked London but oh well"

I'm sorry; if it helps my life is pretty screwed up too. My brother was 12 when he got a girl pregnant and he has a kid, and then there's me i am a complete bitch to the girl i love because she fancy's someone else (a guy) so i know i can never have her. Which is a shame cus she is the most beautiful person i have ever met and now she is fucking dead and i won't ever get to see her again.

"Is that Jasmine, you're talking about by any chance?"

Yer, how'd you know?

"Cus i feel the same way and that is why we are perfect for each other, that girl had such an effect on people they all loved her. You couldn't not, even her psycho killer granddad accepted her and treated her the same."

Do you miss her?

"Yes, all the time and everyday i regret what i did because it was awful and now she is dead and you and everyone else who loved her so much don't get to see her anymore. You obviously do, that is clear from how your expression changes when you talk about her"

Oh god, your right i miss her so much but nobody knew how i felt about her so i don't show it and keep it bottled up, which just isn't good! I say sobbing (i can fake tears well when i want to – i learnt that from living with Finn, Diane and Rob they weren't the easiest people to get along with but i had em wrapped round my little finger – and it is the same now with Fern, she believes she is pulling the strings when in fact it is me).

I make my excuses to leave as i am too "distressed" to carry on and i walk away from the table with tears spilling down my face, but as soon as i turn the corner i wipe them away, smile and run back to the flat to tell Bart everything!


	33. I Promise

**Hey trying something different with the chapter, let me know what you think, please.**

**Chapter thirty three: I promise **

"So let us run through what we have so far. We know she was involved in the death of her best friend right before she came here, and suspiciously in a fire too. And we know she didn't escape the fire as me or Seth would have seen her."

"Right"

"Let me finish! So she probably hid somewhere, and we are guessing the vault? As it is underground and completely sealed off from the pub. Anything i have missed?"

"Nope, i don't believe you have"

"She told you that she regrets what she did every day? That could mean the fire, stabbing me to get at her, blackmailing her Fern did a lot of things to all of us. She ruined all of our lives, and now we are going to put it right."

"We don't know anything for sure yet though"

"True, true. If she still has Jas – which is more than likely as Jas would have come back by now, she never spends longer than a year away. Where would she be keeping her? It can't be somewhere obvious but it must be a place that means something."

"I don't know things have changed dramatically since we arrived" she said walking towards a box full of many papers, tipping them on the floor and searching through them.

"What are you looking for Sinead?"

"I don't know Bart but we must have something here, that tells us where she is. So you just gonna stand there? Or you gonna help?"

"Here, drink this. It will make you feel better, i promise. When have i ever lied to you?"

"Really, that is the choice of words you use Fern, when have you ever lied to me? look at the situation we are in because of you! Ouch, stop hitting me what i say is true it is ALL your fault"

"Hey that ain't fair, you had some part to play too, if you had just spent the rest of your life with me it wouldn't have had to be this way"

"It still doesn't i could just go back home, no one would ever have to know. I disappeared for a year before it is no big deal"

"Shut up, just shut up. Be quiet and let me think" she placed the tape back over the girl's mouth and walks outside.

"Fern?" Sinead answers the phone confused.

"Yer, i was wondering if we could meet up somewhere?"

"Sure why not? I ain't doing anything special"

"Great see you in ten minutes, the folley"

"Bart, i found it. it was a place me and Fern went, a hotel not far from here"

"You think she is being kept in a posh hotel with loads of people around? Get real Sinead! Take this seriously this is my girlfriends' life at stake here"

"Hey, don't take that tone with me! no there was this old restaurant near the hotel, it was boarded up and it gave me the creeps has we walked past. We will check it out later right now i have to go see what Fern wants!"

"No you ain't going, not if she is as dangerous if we think"

"Bart, you ain't my mum and she is the key to finding Jasmine so i will do whatever needs to be done to get that girl back and safe with you. Whatever it takes, whatever the cost. The reward is worth it!"

"Then i am coming too, don't roll your eyes at me, i am trying to keep you safe i care about you ya know. I will stay in the shadows. I promise."

"I don't trust your promises, so i propose, you go sit in college coffee (get a drink) and i promise to be careful"

"NO WAY, that is too far i can't look out for you"

"I promise i will keep my phone on a call to you the entire time and if i am in trouble i will shout bananas"

"You promise?" he says with that about to cave in look travelling across his face.

"I promise"

"Fine, you win i give up" he says deflated.

"Banana milkshake mate"

"Bro, you look like shit. What's up?"

"My life is falling apart dude around me pieces are just breaking away and i don't think i can fix it"

"God i have missed you! It has been quiet since you left – apart from Ruby's constant moaning" He smiles as does his friend while chomping on a biscuit from the jar.

"Go sit with Neil, i will bring over the milkshake oh and Bart man, that's £3.65"

"Where the extra 50p come from?"

"The biscuit" Jono says laughing at his friend.

"What biscuit?" Bart questions spraying crumbs over passing customers

"The one, that you just spat in that poor girl's hair"

**Calling...Bart**

"You must think i am one stupid bitch don't you?" the devious smile inches across the girl's face.

"And a hello to you too, babe"

"Don't try it BABE, you know what i am talking about, don't play the innocent with me"

"Seriously WTF, FIY i have no clue what shit you are talking about love, your mental. I ain't done nothing"

"Oh, so you ain't living with Bart McQueen and seeing him behind my back?"

"Half true. i am living with him cus i couldn't stick it with Finn and Diane, but sleeping with the bloke nah, no way you ain't pinning that on me"

"Sorry, Sorry, sorry. I didn't mean to accuse you of anything i just saw you walking together into the building and well..."

"you put two and two together and thought it equalled five"

"Exactly, now i wanna show you something. Please follow me Sinead it is important, i hope you can still trust me." she turns smiling that evil smile of hers. As Sinead begins to follow, she drops the keys she has been holding.

"Oh Bananas" she exclaims as bends down to pick them up.

"Keep it Jono, and the change i gotta be somewhere" Bart shouts knocking Doug over on his way out of the coffee shop

"Alright Bart, where's the fire?" Bart's face turns to thunder as he gives Doug a sharp look and runs away. Doug turns to watching Bart run away and shouts.

"Can't you English take a joke!"

Bart speeds through the village, he runs faster than ever before, this might be the time he has been waiting over a year and a half for. He arrives at the Folley, but stops dead before getting to the entrance pausing looking over his shoulder he enters warily. Exhaling a held in breath and panting his chest heaving up and down from all the running. But Sinead isn't there her keys carelessly strewn across the floor. Hopefully she still had her phone on. But Bart would have to make a pit stop at his house. For two reasons: he needed the loo and he found something when rifling through his cousin stuff last week, he'd kept it in case it came in handy.

"Shit my keys where are they? No time Bart, you have no time to hesitate – great now you're talking to yourself" he says out loud to nobody in particular.

"Only one thing i can do in a situation like this" he takes a run jump at the door failing the first and second time hitting his head in a clown like fashion.

"Third time lucky" as he tries shoulder barging the door, the lock gives and the door swings through, he runs upstairs and the bathroom. He zips his jeans back up and pulls back the bedcovers searching for it. he finds it eventually the underwear draw of course – he should have looked there first – that is where they keep it in the movies of course!

**A review would be great!**


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